A Light in the Darkness
by JenRar
Summary: On one of history's darkest days, Edward finds his other half. Bella wakes to find that her guardian angel may just be a figment of her imagination. A journey of two lost souls as they find the light when darkness surrounds them.
1. Chapter 0 - Story Warning

Prologue:

This isn't technically a chapter. But because of the sensitive subject matter, I felt a greater warning was needed than just putting it at the top of the first chapter, so no one just skips over it.

This is the story of a teenage Bella on a field trip with her class to the World Trade Center...you guessed it...on September 11, 2001. She is trapped in the North Tower when the planes hit and the towers fall. Every bit of the first two chapters revolves around that, most of the third, as well. From there on out, there are some flashbacks, nightmares, etc, so there are plenty of references, but they are most concentrated in the first two chapters.

I know that day in our history is a touchy subject for a lot of people. I won't be offended if you just simply can't read the story. I tried to be sensitive about it, to handle it with the care that all the victims, as well as their families, the rescuers, and anyone and everyone affected by the horrible attacks, deserves.

I hope I do it justice.

– Jenny


	2. Chapter 1

_A/N: Not much to say here, since you probably read my first "chapter" with the warnings. If you haven't, please, please do. This story could be a big trigger for some, and I'd rather not surprise anyone. Now, if you've read this far and are still up for the journey...welcome! :) I pitched this idea to drotuno...gah, last year, at least. But this was a hard one to get started, and no matter how hard I pushed, it just wouldn't come. A month or so ago, for whatever reason, my muse and plot bunnies decided to get together, and they pretty much screamed at me to sit down and write...so I did. This is the result. I hope you enjoy. :) Will earn the M rating later in the story, btw. ;)_

* * *

**Chapter One**

Bella woke up to darkness—nearly pitch black. She was lying on something hard, like big, broken rocks, and something heavy was on her stomach and legs. Her head was aching, and everything hurt. It was so quiet, she couldn't even hear her own breathing. When she tried to lift her left arm to touch her forehead, the pain was so sharp, so intense, she nearly vomited, and then everything went black once more.

~oOo~

The next time Bella came to, sound had returned. It was still eerily dark wherever she was, and she was still hurting more than she'd ever hurt in her life, but she could hear...something. Sirens, maybe. It was as if she were underwater. Sounds were muted, but there. Almost foreign-sounding to her ears as they competed with the pounding heartbeat in her head.

Remembering the pain when she'd tried to move her left arm before, she tentatively lifted her right, relieved when she could lift it without screaming. She reached up toward her face, and when her fingers touched her forehead, they felt wet...sticky.

_Blood._

Bella began to panic. She was trapped, alone, in the dark. Her arm had to be broken, since she could tell it was lying at an odd angle, and she was bleeding. Her heart was racing, and she couldn't seem to catch her breath.

"Shh," a voice soothed from the darkness. "Slow your breathing down, or you're going to pass out."

Bella watched as a flashlight was clicked on, illuminating the face of an older boy—a man?—as he peered down at her. She could see his shoulders and chest move, like he was breathing deeply, so she tried to copy what he was doing, hoping he could help her.

"There ya go," he said once she was breathing more normally.

"Wh-Who are you? Where are we?" she asked, trying to turn her head to look around. Without the light from his flashlight, it was too dark to see anything, so she turned her gaze back to the stranger.

"My name's Edward...Masen," he finished after a pause. "What's your name, Little Bird?"

"Isabella Swan," Bella answered automatically. "Bella. Where are we? What happened?" She couldn't stop her voice from rising, nearly becoming hysterical again.

"Bella, you need to calm down, okay? I'll answer your questions, but you have to slow your breathing or you'll hyperventilate."

Bella nodded, trusting this stranger—Edward—even though she didn't know him.

"How old are you, Bella?"

"Fifteen," she said and then clarified, "in two days."

She watched the shadows from the flashlight on Edward's face and saw him frown and then nod.

"Can you tell me the last thing you remember?"

Bella closed her eyes for a moment and bit her lip, thinking back to that morning.

"_Keep up!" Mr. Stephens called as he led the rest of the class into two elevators to continue down._

_Bella looked over at Sarah when she groaned and asked, "Mom, can we find that bathroom now? I really don't feel well."_

_Sarah's mother, who was one of two extra chaperones for their class's trip to the Windows on the World in the World Trade Center, nodded, wrapping an arm around her. "Come on, girls. Let's go ask someone where we can go."_

_Bella and Ashley followed behind as Sarah clutched her lower stomach._

_When they finally got to the bathroom, there was a small line. They waited, talking quietly about what they'd seen and heard on the tour._

_By the time a stall was free for Sarah, most of the bathroom had emptied out, the last two women leaving the other two stalls and washing their hands after Bella's group had been in line for almost ten minutes._

_Just after the door closed behind them, Sarah called, "Anyone have a...something?" She sighed, sounding frustrated. "I forgot to bring one."_

_Mrs. Peters opened her purse and pulled out a wrapped package, putting it into Sarah's hand as she held it out from under the front of the stall. "Here, sweetie. Try to hurry. The others will be outside already, so we need to catch up as soon as we can."_

_Sarah muttered something under her breath, and Mrs. Peters raised an eyebrow, shaking her head. Ashley and Bella hid their giggles behind their hands, turning to the mirror to check their hair before they had to leave to meet the group._

_Just as Sarah walked out of the stall and met them at the sink, there was a huge thud, muffled but still the loudest thing Bella had ever heard in her life. The room shook, and they all screamed as the lights flickered and then went out, leaving them in total darkness until an emergency light came on in the corner._

"_Was that an earthquake?" Ashley asked, clutching Bella's arm so hard it stung._

_Bella had never been in an earthquake, but it didn't feel like what she'd imagined an earthquake would feel like. Especially not with all the noise she could hear from outside the bathroom. People were screaming, alarms were going off... She wanted to cover her ears and cry, but she couldn't._

"_I don't know, sweetie," Mrs. Peters responded. "Hold hands and let's go out to the hall to find out what's going on._

_When she tried to push open the door, it wouldn't budge._

"_Mom! Open the door!" Sarah cried, pushing the door beside her mother._

_Mrs. Peters tried again and then shook her head. "It's stuck, girls. Something's in front of it. Just stay calm. Someone will move whatever fell in front of the door and get us out of here soon, I'm sure."_

_The four of them clung together for well over an hour, crying as they heard more screams, explosions, and then nothing but the fire alarms. The air was thick with dust and smoke coming in from around the door. It felt to Bella like they'd been abandoned. They yelled and pounded on the door until Bella's arms felt like they were going to fall off and her voice was hoarse from the strain._

_Almost two hours after it all began, the walls began to shake, the floor under her feet rolled so hard that they all fell to the ground, and a noise much louder than before—sounding like bending and screeching metal—began, and the next thing Bella knew, she was falling into blackness. She screamed, throwing her hand out to try to reach Ashley, but her friend was gone._

_Bella screamed out their names before something hit the back of her head, and then she heard nothing as her eyes closed and everything faded away._

"Oh, God!" Bella cried, even more scared now than she had been. "What happened? Where are my friends?"

Edward was right there, grasping her flailing hand as Bella tried futilely to search for Ashley and Sarah.

"Hold still, Bella, please," he murmured loudly enough that she could hear over her sobs. "I'll explain, but you need to be still for me, okay?"

Bella registered the cold touch of his skin, but it was a relief to have someone there...someone else who was alive and she could touch.

She listened as he told her about the planes hitting the towers, sobbing as she thought of her friends and classmates, about the people in the buildings and on the planes. Her panic rose again as fear settled deep in her bones.

"So we're...trapped?" she asked, feeling the urge to get up...to run...bearing down on her. She tried to sit up, but the pain in her arm stopped her from moving much at all. Still, Bella couldn't help but try again. Trying to move her legs instead, she found that she couldn't. "I'm paralyzed! I can't move!"

Edward's hand tightened slightly on hers as he spoke. "Lie still, Bella. You're hurt, and moving could hurt you more. Can you wiggle your toes?"

Bella tried, and though it hurt, she nodded. "Y-Yeah," she gasped, sighing in relief.

"You aren't paralyzed," Edward said, glancing down toward her feet and then back to her face, the flashlight keeping half his face in shadow. "You're pinned under some rubble."

"Are you my guardian angel? Is that why you're not trapped like I am?" Bella asked, beginning to feel a little more safe with him beside her.

She saw him make a face, like he was in pain, and then he shook his head. "I'm no angel, Bella. I...just got lucky."

"'Kay," she said, nodding again.

"Can you tell me what hurts, Bella?" Edward asked. "Your head? Neck? Back?"

Bella shook her head minutely. "Not too bad. Just...sore, like I tripped—I do that a lot," she admitted sheepishly before continuing. "M-My arm really hurts, and my chest hurts a little."

Edward nodded once, squeezing her hand gently, and Bella fell silent.

After a moment, he spoke again. "Tell me about your family?"

Bella suspected Edward had just asked her to keep her occupied, but thinking of her parents and stepfather made her feel better, so she was okay with that.

"I live with my mom and stepdad, Phil, here in New York City. We moved here in June, when they got married. Phil plays baseball, and my mom..." Bella wanted to laugh, trying to figure out how to describe her mother to Edward. "Sometimes, she's more of a kid than I am. She has a lot of hobbies, and one of those is sculpting. She sells some of her pieces to some of the smaller galleries. Anyway, my dad lives in Washington State. He's the chief of police in a little town there. I go see him every summer."

"Where did you live before New York City?" Edward asked after Bella had been quiet for a minute.

She sighed. "Florida. I liked it there. It was sunny all the time, and there were a lot of open spaces compared to New York, where there are buildings and people everywhere."

Edward nodded, and Bella caught the glimpse of a frown. "Yes, definitely a lot of people here." Then he smiled and asked, "What's your favorite class at school?"

Smiling, Bella answered, "English and art. I love reading and writing." She felt her face heat when she admitted, "I love Harry Potter, and I've written some stories for that series."

"Oh yeah?" Edward smiled again. "Let me guess. You're a Harry and Hermione fan."

Bella giggled, which felt odd to her, given the circumstances, but she couldn't resist his teasing. "Yes, but mainly, I like to write stories centered on Cedric Diggory. He's my favorite character."

Edward hummed his amusement and nodded. "Besides reading and writing, what do you like to do in your free time?"

"I like to draw, and I like music," Bella told him, enjoying the smile that he gave at her answer.

"What kind?"

"Pretty much everything. My mom likes to listen to everything from Irish folk music to classical to eighties rock. I usually do my homework while listening to classic rock, but then I like to fall asleep to classical because it's soothing."

A piece of rock fell somewhere to the side, causing Bella to remember exactly where they were and what was happening. Suddenly terrified again, she began to struggle to get up, unable to help herself because of the trapped feeling.

"Bella!" Edward's voice was firm. "You need to calm down, Little Bird. You're going to hurt yourself."

"I can't!" Bella gasped, struggling to move her legs, to kick the heavy weight from her body. "Please! I can't breathe. I need to get up!"

Bella ripped her hand from Edward's grasp and, forgetting her broken arm, tried to push herself to a seated position. The pain was enough to make her cry out, and the next thing she knew, darkness clouded her vision, and then she felt nothing at all.

* * *

_A/N: Tough, tough chapter, I know. This and chapter two are probably the roughest of the whole story. My heart absolutely broke writing them, and I cried more than once._

_So many thanks go to Deb (drotuno), for prereading and letting me bounce ideas off her left and right. She's got a new story starting today called Masen Manor, and it's SO MUCH FUN and so different from anything she's written to date. I guarantee you'll love it. Check my Favorite Authors for a link to her profile. Thanks also go to my prereaders: Beffers87 (who also made the GORGEOUS banner and a manip for a later chapter that will make your heart stop, I promise! ;) Check my profile for a link!), Cara, & Pamela. Their help was invaluable on this._

_I'll be posting once a week on Wednesdays starting this coming week, so keep an eye out, and please, let me know what you think! See you then! – Jen_


	3. Chapter 2

_A/N: You guys... *sniffle* You seriously made my week with your responses to the first chapter! Thank you so very much. :) A lot of you asked if/suggested that Edward is a vampire in this one. You'll learn Edward's story this chapter. He's very canon in this story until later on, so... ;) Now, read on! (And again, warning this chapter, as well, just like the first.)_

* * *

**Chapter Two**

Edward watched Bella sleep, although he knew sleep wasn't quite the correct term for it. She'd passed out from the pain of her injuries—in particular, from the very broken bones in her arm. From what he could see just by looking and not touching, he could tell that both the radius and the ulna were broken. She was lucky—Edward nearly scoffed at even the thought that Bella was _lucky_—that neither had broken through the skin.

He'd been relieved to hear that her head and neck didn't hurt, _which_ hopefully meant there was no damage to her spine and she didn't have too bad of a concussion, if she had one at all. Maybe she'd lucked out and hadn't hit her head on the way down. She'd only been out a couple of minutes this time—he had no idea long she'd been unconscious after the fall—so he would wait to see if she woke on her own after a few minutes and then simply do his best to keep her awake until rescue came.

He began thinking of her other injuries while he waited. The chest pain wasn't good. The pain coupled with the raspy sound of her breath made him think that at least one rib was broken, and although the thought terrified him, it might have punctured her lung. She seemed to be breathing okay, even though it sounded wrong, so he wouldn't do anything for the moment.

There was a steel beam across her legs and a big chunk of concrete on her abdomen. That worried him more than anything now that he knew her head and neck were okay. There was too much blood from Bella's scrapes and bruises to know if she were bleeding internally—yet. That she hadn't mentioned pain in her stomach and legs was also worrying.

Even though she was out, he didn't want to move from her side. Edward still couldn't believe that here, buried deep in the rubble from the towers, he'd found his mate—and a teenage human child at that.

He'd been searching through the building's debris on the hunt for survivors and had just about given up...when he'd heard her cry out. He'd heard her heartbeat and breathing, but had foolishly assumed it had belonged to one of the firemen who were struggling through the concrete nearer to the top of the wreckage. When he realized it was a survivor he'd heard, buried deeper than he'd expected, he'd raced through the ruins, trying to locate the mind of whoever had cried out. He was so used to relying on his gift that it had taken him several minutes to realize he couldn't hear one. The victim's mind was completely silent to him. Using his ears, rather than his mind, he'd quickly found the young girl in front of him.

The moment his flashlight had passed across her face, Edward felt like someone had reached into his chest and squeezed his heart. He'd never felt anything like it in all his life—human or immortal. He hadn't realized then what he'd felt, but he'd known he couldn't leave her. So he'd sat and waited. When she'd awoken again and he'd looked into her eyes and heard her voice, it had been like the sun had come out from behind the clouds. His entire being had flooded with light and warmth. That was when he'd known... He'd remembered Carlisle and Esme, Rose and Emmett, and Alice and Jasper... Even now, decades after finding their mates for the first time, they each felt that way when they looked at one another.

He still wasn't sure what to make of it all. The thought of leaving her made him skin crawl, but he knew there was no other option. He would stay with her and make sure she got out of the remains of the building alive, and then he would leave. She was young, innocent, and he would not be the one to take that away from her—no matter how much it hurt him in the process.

Bella woke a few minutes later, stirring with a cry of pain as she tried to move her arm.

"Be still, sweetheart," he murmured.

"Where am I?" she asked, but then she shook her head. "Oh, yeah. How long was I out?"

Edward frowned. "Just a few minutes."

"I'm scared..."

"I know, Little Bird. I am, too," he admitted. "But I'm here, okay? We're gonna get you out of here. I promise."

She nodded, wincing at the movement, and breathed deep. Edward could hear the rattle in her chest that all but assured him she'd indeed punctured her lung.

"Wh-Why do you keep calling me Little Bird?" Bella asked.

Chuckling, Edward answered, "You remind me of a little bird. So small, so weak-looking, but strong. You're so strong, Bella. You're a fighter, just like a little bird who's trying to survive in a big, scary world."

Bella nodded. "Then I'll call you angel," she wheezed before falling silent.

Edward thought about protesting, yet again, that he wasn't an angel, but decided if it helped Bella's peace of mind, he'd let her call him anything she wanted.

As he watched her breathe, Edward hummed the melody aloud that he'd been composing in his head since first finding Bella, trying to ignore all the voices he was hearing in his head. The last victim he'd heard had been pulled free from the rubble a few hours before, and now the only voices in his head were of the firemen and other emergency personnel as they searched for survivors and bodies to recover. The devastation was beyond anything he'd ever witnessed in his hundred years. At a later date, he knew he would need to truly face what he'd seen and heard in the last twelve hours, but for now, he was putting every effort into blocking everything but Bella that he could.

He thought about Emmett, who was on the other side of the rubble, working with firemen to clear a portion of debris blocking what had been a stairwell. His brother had yelled Edward's name in his head a few hours before, just checking in. Edward hadn't been able to gather the courage to leave Bella's side, so he'd called as loudly as he'd dared—hoping it would be loud enough for Emmett to hear, but not so loud as to catch the ear of any of the rescue workers—telling him that he was fine, but busy. Emmett had responded in his head immediately that he'd heard.

He and his brother were the only two members of the family that were at the site of the former Twin Towers. Carlisle was at one of the closest hospitals, helping treat the victims, while Esme and Rose were at one of the places that family members were being sent to, in order to help in any way they could. They five of them had made the five and a half hour trip to New York City from Rochester in under three hours, leaving the car parked out of the way about a hundred miles outside the city so they could come in on foot and avoid the police and military that were blocking traffic.

Jasper and Alice had stayed behind in Rochester. Neither of them were in the right frame of mind to be anywhere near New York City. Alice was blaming herself for not being able to prevent the attacks—or more correctly, for not seeing them happen beforehand. Even though they'd all tried to tell her that she couldn't have foreseen them, she was hating herself and her "gift." And Jasper... Besides the fact that the scent of blood was almost overpowering, especially outside the rubble, the emotions and devastation were strong enough that they would've brought his brother to his knees. Jasper was one of the strongest vampires, emotionally, Edward knew, but this would've been too much for him to handle.

Bella groaned, bringing Edward back to the present, and he switched the flashlight on, holding it up so Bella would be able to see his face.

"E-Edward?" she croaked, her voice dry and harsh-sounding.

"I'm here, Bella." Reaching around beside him, Edward grabbed the water bottle and then pulled a cloth from his pocket. He and Emmett hadn't known what they would need going into the wreckage, so they'd just stuffed their coat pockets full of everything they could think of. Wetting the corner of the cloth, he held it to Bella's lips. "Suck on this, sweetheart. If I try to give the bottle to you, you'll choke."

She hummed as she sucked the water from the cloth, her voice much more clear when she said, "Thanks."

"More?"

There was a pause, and then she told him no. Bella gripped his hand tightly, whimpering. After a minute, she begged, "Talk to me..."

Edward chuckled low. "What do you want to know?"

"Tell me about yourself?" The request came out in the form of a question, but Edward could hear the silent plea to her voice, as if she needed him to talk to keep her mind off her situation.

A thousand thoughts raced through his head. He couldn't tell her the truth, and he hated that. "I'm...seventeen," he said after hesitating. "I was born in Chicago, but I live with my family in Rochester."

"Tell me about your family," she requested when he'd been quiet for a bit.

He moved the flashlight, settling it just to the side so she could still see him but it wasn't shining in their faces. Then he smiled and squeezed her hand, which was still clasped in his.

"My parents—Carlisle and Esme—have been married...for what seems like eighty years." He chuckled. "They're almost disgustingly happy. He's a doctor. She's a stay-at-home mom, although she's big into interior design. She's designed every home we've ever lived in."

Bella interrupted with a gasp as a flash of pain crossed her features, and then she asked, "How many times have you moved? Sounds like a lot."

She made a face at that, making Edward chuckle.

"A few times. My dad likes to move around and take jobs at hospitals that need his help."

"C-Cool," Bella stuttered, the shock she was in making her speech slur. "Wh-Who else?"

"My older brother, Emmett," Edward began, if for no other reason than to keep her awake and alert, "is married to the girl of his dreams, my sister-in-law Rosalie. I have a twin sister, Alice, and a foster brother, Jasper."

"Wow." Bella smiled. "I always wanted brothers or sisters."

Edward looked at her worriedly as her speech got more and more slurred, but schooled his features when her eyes met his again. "It's nice having siblings, but sometimes I wish for more peace and quiet," he said honestly, thinking both literally and of his mind-reading.

Almost so distorted he couldn't understand her, Bella slurred, "Silence is overrated."

Listening to the eery silence around them, including even the few voices he could hear in his head, Edward was inclined to agree with her.

"What's the song you keep humming?"

Edward smiled. He'd wondered if she'd noticed. Not being able to hear her thoughts was...disconcerting. "Just...music," he hedged, not sure why he didn't want to tell her it was something he'd made up on the spot.

"Mm, I like it," she said, grimacing when she tried to move.

He started up again, glad when it seemed to help her relax.

The next handful of hours passed much the same way. Bella slept off and on, her body weak with exhaustion and pain, and in between, they would talk. She told him more about her life in Florida, more about her parents and the move to New York. He told her everything he could about his life, fudging details when he had to. It seemed neither of them could hear enough about the other. Edward knew a lot of it on her end was because there was simply nothing else to do and because she needed something to take her mind off where she was and how much pain she was in. But he was soaking up every detail about his mate and committing to memory, which would have to last him the rest of forever.

"How long have I been here?" Bella asked suddenly. "What time is it?"

"It's just before midnight—a little over twelve and a half hours since the tower fell," he answered, taking her hand when she reached blindly for him. "I'm right here, Little Bird. I'm not going anywhere."

"I...I'm cold," Bella admitted, sounding pained, and then a shiver racked her frame.

Edward shrugged out of the firefighter's coat he'd been wearing and draped it over her, even knowing she wasn't really cold. He had a feeling it was shock and blood loss, so it wouldn't do much good physically, but the psychological effect might be worth it.

"Th-Thanks," she stammered.

It was dark, but Edward's vision allowed him to see her with perfect clarity, and he watched as she bit her lower lip. He was about to ask if she was okay, even though he knew that was a ridiculous question—of course she wasn't okay!—but then Bella spoke again.

"Hurts," Bella groaned, coughing. "Why does it hurt? What happened?"

Edward could immediately smell the scent of fresh blood in the open air and turned the light more toward her face. There were specks of red dotting her lips, and he knew Bella was beginning to cough up blood. Panicked, he opened his senses fully and took a deep breath in—something he'd been avoiding, given the air around them—and realized while he'd been holding his breath, the scent of her blood had grown exponentially. Bella was so distracted by how she was feeling, she barely seemed to register as Edward slid his hand inside the coat and up her torso. When he pressed lightly on the upper left portion of her abdomen, she cried out.

That was bad. That pain plus the blood and the confusion meant internal bleeding, most likely from the punctured lung and maybe a ruptured spleen.

"Bella," he said in a rush, "I've got to get you out of here now. We can't wait anymore for someone to get to you. This is going to hurt, sweetheart. I'm sorry."

Bella blinked, gazing up at him blearily, and slurred, "Edduurd."

Edward grabbed the steel beam across Bella's legs and lifted it—as heavy as it was, it was no match for his supernatural strength—maneuvering around obstacles to set it down away from Bella. Moving the concrete from her torso was just as quick.

When he got back to her side, her eyes were wide, more clear than they'd been for hours.

"H-How?" she asked, but Edward didn't have a chance to ask before her eyes rolled back and she passed out.

Worried about the sudden drop of her blood pressure—her heart had slowed to half the beats per minute it had been—Edward scooped her up and began making his way through the rubble, muttering softly to Bella the whole time.

"Stay with me, sweetheart."

"Keep breathing, Isabella."

"Please, Bella. I can't..." Edward swallowed, not able to go on.

When he knew he was close enough that he knew they would be able to reach her, Edward set Bella down amongst the concrete, rebar, and wiring, reaching for one of the pipes littering the ground.

Finding another pipe to bang it against, Edward began making noise, hoping to draw the rescue workers' attention. Minutes passed as Bella's breathing got more and more labored, her heart slowing even further, before yells from the men closest to his position let Edward know that help was coming.

With a few more loud, rapid bangs of the pipe, Edward tossed it down and then squatted down beside Bella. Brushing her hair back from her forehead, he whispered, "You're gonna be fine, Little Bird. Just hang in there. Help is on its way."

He waited as long as he could, but as the two rescue workers got close, Edward melted into the shadows, watching as the men dropped to Bella's side.

~oOo~

It was a long twenty minutes before the men were able to secure Bella to the backboard, and every minute, her heart slowed more and more. Edward didn't know what he'd do if it stopped before they were able to pull her from the wreckage and get her to the hospital. To Carlisle. But finally, she was clear of the rubble and being taken to the ambulance, which had been driven as close as possible to the downed buildings. Edward had followed their progress through the rubble, and as soon as he saw Bella loaded into the ambulance, he raced away from the crowd on foot, knowing he'd be able to beat the vehicle to the hospital.

Once there, he zeroed in on Carlisle's thoughts and found him in the ER, coming out of a curtained trauma room.

"Edward?"

In words too fast for human hearing, Edward said, "I-I need you. Now."

Carlisle nodded and led him through the emergency room to a doctors' lounge in the back. "Talk to me, son," he said as soon as the door closed behind them.

Edward suddenly felt every emotion he'd bottled up inside the wreckage with Bella come flying out, and he began shaking. "I..I met my mate," he uttered, feeling his gut twist. Worry for Bella was at the forefront, but there was also sadness over the fact that even if she lived, their relationship would never be.

His father, for all intents and purposes, looked shocked and then nodded slowly. "I'm guessing since you don't seem...happy about it that it's not...wanted?"

Shaking his head, Edward said, "She's..." He swallowed. "She's fifteen, Carlisle. And she's hurt. She was in the North Tower. She's coming here. I need you to... I can't..." Edward gripped his hair and pulled so hard, he was afraid he'd rip it from its roots. "You can't let her die. She can't become one of us—she's too young, and I wouldn't steal her life from her that way—but I have to know she's safe. Please, Carlisle. Save her."

Carlisle reached out and pulled Edward into a fierce hug, and Edward took a moment of comfort in the embrace. His eyes were stinging with venom that would never fall, and he felt wrecked inside, hollow, and like he couldn't catch his breath.

"Dr. Cullen?" A nurse stuck her head into the room and cleared her throat. "We have a trauma coming in...a victim pulled from the tower. Her stats are dropping, and they're afraid they're going to lose her."

"I'll be right there, Linda," Carlisle said.

Edward murmured to low for the nurse to hear. "Internal bleeding, dangerously low pulse and respiration, possible punctured lung and ruptured spleen, and multiple fractures—the radius and ulna on her left arm are definitely broken, and her legs were trapped under a beam." He'd been through medical school twice, so he knew what he was talking about, and he knew none of that was good.

"Call and have them prep OR 2. I have a feeling if she's been in the wreckage this long, she'll need immediate surgery," Carlisle said aloud to the nurse, taking Edward at his word.

"They're two minutes out," she said quietly, closing the door behind her.

"Edward," Carlisle started, but Edward stepped back, looking up at him through eyes that felt like sandpaper.

Shaking his head, he said, "Go, Carlisle. Save her, please."

Carlisle nodded once and then turned and left the room.

Edward stayed around the corner as Bella was wheeled into the ER. Carlisle immediately got to work, listening to the EMTs call out numbers and information. He stood at the end of the hallways watching as his father and two nurses loaded onto the elevator with Bella's stretcher.

Just before the door closed, one of the nurses called out, "She's not breathing!"

Carlisle glanced at him before turning his attention to Bella, and then the elevator door closed and they were out of view.

Edward raced to the stairwell, barely keeping his speed in check, and ran up to the fourth floor, to the surgical wing. From Carlisle's thoughts, he could see one of the nurses pushing air into Bella's lungs through a bag and mask. His father was issuing instructions to the nurses even as the elevator doors opened. As Edward watched from his spot in a small alcove, Carlisle and the others exited, and they were greeted by two nurses who took over for the ones from the ER, as well as another doctor. Bella's stretcher was pushed through the OR doors, and with one last glance at Edward, Carlisle hurried behind them.

Edward sank to the floor, head in hands, and prayed.

* * *

_A/N: So yes, he's a vampire. The Cullens are all vampires, just like in canon. Poor Bella isn't faring too well right now, is she? Don't worry... For all those that are worried about her being too young, I agree. She is too young to be changed right now. So that should give you some idea of how this will progress. :)_

_Don't forget to check out Deb's (drotuno) new fic, Masen Manor. You can find her on my Favorite Authors list. MM is amazing, something totally different than I've ever read. So please do check it out! :)_

_Okay, as I stated last time, I'll be posting regularly on Wednesdays, so I'll see you next week. Leave me a note and tell me what you thought of Edward! Mwah! – Jen_


	4. Chapter 3

_A/N: Thank you guys so very much for all your reviews! The response has been tremendous, and I feel blessed. You'll get answers to a lot of the questions you had so far, so I won't bother you with them in the A/N. ;) Now, on to chapter three!_

* * *

**Chapter Three**

Bella's head was fuzzy, but nothing hurt as she slowly became aware once more. She wasn't sure where she was, although, from the sounds and smells, she guessed the hospital. From beside her, she heard whispering, and she strained to make out words. Unfortunately, between her head, which felt like it was stuffed with cotton, and because she was so tired that she couldn't move, she only caught a few words.

"...fine, son," one voice said.

"...so quiet," another responded. "Did...hurt...when I moved her?...waited because...stable...knew...could injure...more if..."

There was something so familiar about the second voice. She was having trouble remembering how she knew it.

"Edward, you did...you could do...have died if...hadn't."

_Edward!_

Bella wanted to see him, but when she tried to open her eyes, they wouldn't cooperate. She settled for calling his name. "Edward," she cried softly.

The whispering stopped, but before Bella could say anything else, she felt sleep pulling her under, and then she heard no more.

~oOo~

The next time Bella awoke, she was able to open her eyes, and she looked around, panicked, until she realized that she was indeed in the hospital. Her mom was asleep in a chair next to Bella's bed, her head tilted forward and a soft snore coming from her lips. When Bella shifted, pain shot through her chest, and she whimpered.

Her mom's head snapped up, her eyes wide, and she sighed, "Bella..."

"Hey, Mom," Bella said, and when her mom's eyes filled with tears, Bella couldn't stop her own from forming. All of the fear and sadness she'd felt since being trapped in the World Trade Center came pouring out as she began to sob, the pain in her chest and arm only adding to the tears.

"Oh, baby," her mom said, leaning over and cupping Bella's face, soothing away the tears as fast as they flowed. "I'm right here, sweetheart. You're safe now, I promise. You're going to be okay."

Bella continued crying, letting her mother's presence wrap around her like a hug.

"Sarah? Ashley?" she finally asked when she could think again.

Her mom frowned and shook her head. "I'm sorry, honey," she said softly.

Bella's tears started anew and shook her body so hard, all the pain came rushing in at once. "Hurts," she gasped, feeling unable to catch her breath.

"Hold on, Bella," her mother said urgently. "I'll call the doctor."

Bella tried to breathe, only able to draw shallow breaths, as her mom pressed the call button beside her bed to summon a nurse.

An older woman came bustling into the room with a syringe, and she smiled down at Bella as she injected it into the IV attached to Bella's arm. "That should help, sweetheart," she said softly, pushing a button on the monitor beside the bed. As the medicine started working, Bella began breathing easier, and the nurse nodded. "There now. That's better, isn't it?"

Bella couldn't answer as sleep pulled her under once more.

~oooOOOooo~

From outside her room and down the hall, Edward listened to Bella cry for her friends, his still heart aching at the pain she was feeling. He wanted to go to her, to hold her and comfort her...but he knew he couldn't.

She was going to be okay. That was the important part. Carlisle had assured him of two things. One, he'd done the right thing by waiting to move her. Too often, someone pinned under something heavy—whether it be a steel beam, concrete, or a vehicle—was moved before rescue was ready, which led to their death. Edward had made the right decision to wait, since Bella had been relatively stable. The second thing Carlisle had assured him was that the surgery had been a success: there should be no last effects of the punctured lung; the broken rib, arm, and leg would be back to normal as soon as the bones healed; and she could live a long, normal, comfortable life without her spleen.

But Edward knew the emotional damage would last much, much longer. And as much as he wished he could be there, he couldn't be. If he stayed, he would draw her into his world—and the vampire world was no place for a fifteen-year-old human child. No, he wouldn't be the one to ruin her life, which was going to be altered forever after the events of the past forty-eight hours anyway.

As soon as Bella's mother left the room to go to the cafeteria, Edward stole into her room one last time, wanting—needing—to say goodbye. As he edged up to the bed, Carlisle spoke in his head from where he was standing at the nurses' station outside the room.

_Your sister called and asked that I leave you something in Bella's room, Edward._

Curious, Edward looked around, and his eyes fell on the thin black marker on the tray. Immediately, he knew just what Alice must have seen. Uncapping the marker, he moved around to the other side of the bed, where Bella's casted arm lay atop the blankets and a pillow that was helping to keep it stable. With a deep breath, he began to draw.

Five minutes later, he put the lid back on the marker and slid it into his pocket, satisfied by what he'd drawn. He could see Bella's mother's thoughts, and she was beginning to finish up her dinner. As much as it pained him, he knew the time had come to say goodbye.

Leaning down, Edward brushed a finger down Bella's pale cheek. "Goodbye, Little Bird." He bent and pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead, inhaling her scent, so strong and intense, even through the medicinal smells of the hospital, and closed his eyes, savoring the contact until she stirred beneath his lips.

"Edward," Bella murmured, and for a moment, he worried that she'd awoken.

When she said nothing more, he stood and, with a pang in his chest, left the room, fleeing from the hospital without a backward glance.

~oooOOOooo~

When Bella woke again, her mother wasn't in the room, but a doctor in a white coat was standing beside the bed, looking at the monitor, which was beeping softly. He was young, very handsome, with very unique eyes—some sort of golden color that reminded her of something, although she couldn't remember what.

"Oh good, you're awake," he said in a calm, friendly voice. "My name is Dr. Cullen. I treated you when you first came in...Bella, right? I was told you like to be called Bella, rather than Isabella."

Bella nodded. "Yeah, Bella," she croaked, clearing her dry throat. "Water?"

Dr. Cullen held up a finger and walked over to the other side of the room. He was back in moments and reached up, placing a flat stick-like object against her lips. "This should help," he said. "We'll see how your lungs are doing before giving you a glass of water, okay?"

Bella sucked on the sponge and let the thin trickle of water wet her dry lips, mouth, and tongue. When she felt like she could speak again, she asked, "Where's my mom?"

He smiled and took the sponge when she held it out. "She ran down to get some coffee and something to eat. She should be back anytime. Your dad is with her. He arrived at the hospital a few minutes ago."

Afraid of the answer, but needing to know, Bella asked, "Wh-What's wrong with me? Am I gonna be okay?"

Dr. Cullen smiled. "You're going to be just fine, Bella. You have a broken rib, which punctured your lung—"

Bella began to breathe heavier, and Dr. Cullen reached out and laid a cool hand on her right arm.

"Breathe, Bella," he soothed. "You're all right now. When you got to the hospital, you were immediately rush into surgery. I repaired your lung, and it should heal just fine. I'm afraid you ruptured your spleen, as well, so it had to be removed." He held up a hand before she could panic. "It's serious, but you're an otherwise healthy young woman, so as long as you take antibiotics when needed and get vaccinated against a few things you wouldn't normally need to get medicine for, you should be just fine. Okay?"

Bella nodded, feeling oddly calmed by his comforting nature and words. "That's why my chest and stomach hurt?"

Dr. Cullen nodded. "You also broke both bones in your left arm—your mom told us you're right handed, so that's good, isn't it?" He smiled. "We set the breaks during surgery and put it in a cast. You also fractured your ankle, so there is a cast on it. It wasn't a full break, so you won't need the cast on nearly as long for it."

Bella glanced down and looked at the cast on her ankle and then up to her arm, and when she saw what was drawn on her arm, she startled.

A beautiful pair of wings—angels wings—curved around a little bird. _Little Bird_...

"Where is he?" she asked the doctor. "Where's Edward?"

The doctor barely reacted, but she saw it when he froze for a moment before saying calmly, "I'm not sure whom you mean."

Bella gestured to her arm. "He drew this. He was here. I heard him talking—to you! I heard him talking to you earlier, after I woke up the first time."

"The TV was on," the doctor said smoothly. "I'm sure that's what you heard."

"He was with me before I was rescued," Bella argued.

Still calm, Dr. Cullen said, "Bella, you were alone when you were rescued."

"No," she said, shaking her head. "He helped me get out from under the wreckage, I swear. He moved the beam from my legs and the concrete from my stomach. I saw him!"

Just then, her parents entered the room.

"Bella, you're awake!"

Bella accepted her mother's hug, but before she could say anything more to the doctor, he was gone.

"Bells, it's good to see you, kiddo." Charlie, her dad, bent down to hug her awkwardly, ending with a pat on her shoulder.

"Hi, Daddy. You didn't have to come... I'm okay."

"Of course I had to come. It took me a while to get into the city because of security, but..." He patted his badge, which was attached to his belt, and smiled.

"When do you have to go home?"

He shook his head and pulled up the two guest chairs, sitting in one after her mom sat in the other. "I'm here until you're sick of me, kid."

She smiled. "'Kay."

~oOo~

Over the next week, Bella continued to ask everyone she saw about Edward, her guardian angel. No one knew whom she meant. She'd told them all over and over again that he'd rescued her, that he'd moved the beam off her legs and the concrete off her belly, only to be told that a fireman had been the one to rescue her and there'd been no beam or concrete on her.

"It's just your mind playing tricks on you, sweetie," her mom and dad had assured her several times. "That happens during a trauma. Your mind dreamed him up to keep you company while you waited for someone to find you."

"How do you explain this?" Bella had asked, shoving her arm toward her mother. "He called me Little Bird, and I said he was my angel."

Her mother's explanation that a nurse must have heard her say it—"You know you talk in your sleep, Isabella," she'd said—and then drawn it... Bella just knew that was wrong. It had been Edward. He'd been here, and she didn't know where he'd gone. She wanted him to come back. Her heart already missed him, like there was an ache in her chest that didn't have anything to do with her broken rib or any of her other physical injuries.

"Bella?" Her mom poked her head into Bella's room, interrupting her thoughts, and smiled. "Oh good, you're awake. I have someone here who would like to officially meet you, sweetie."

Bella gasped and reached up to tuck her hair behind her ear. "Edward?" she asked, looking hopefully at the door.

Her mother frowned, shaking her head, and stood back.

Following her dad into the room was a young guy, maybe ten years older than Bella herself, with dark blond hair and a tentative smile. He was wearing a faded pair of jeans and an FDNY T-shirt, holding a small stuffed animal—a pink bear with the words _Get Well Soon_ embroidered on the stomach. He stepped up to the bed and said, "Bella? I'm Franco Salvatore."

"Nice to meet you," Bella murmured, accepting the bear when he held it out.

"Mr. Salvatore is the man who saved you," her mother chimed in.

Bella wanted to protest, to say that Edward had saved her, but she knew it would fall on deaf ears. Instead, she said, "Thank you," squeezing the bear close and wishing it were Edward's hand she were clutching.

He stood there awkwardly for a minute as Bella gazed into her lap, wishing they would all leave her alone. Finally, he said, "Your mom said you're healing well. I'm glad to hear it. I'll get out of your hair now, but I just wanted to say that I'm glad we found you in time."

Bella nodded. "Thanks. Me, too."

After another moment, he turned and spoke quietly to her mother.

"I'm going to walk Mr. Salvatore out, Bella," her mom said, and then they turned and left the room, leaving Bella alone with Charlie and the bear.

~oooOOOooo~

Edward had been in Alaska for three weeks when Carlisle called him to tell him that Bella had been released from the hospital. His father hadn't remained at the hospital in New York City that whole time. In fact, he'd left the day after Edward, but instead of going to Denali as Edward had, Carlisle had gone back to Rochester. He'd asked the head nurse to call him when Bella was released, as he would be thinking of the girl he'd helped save after the terrorist attack. She had, and once Carlisle had gotten word, he'd called Edward.

For eighty-three years, Edward had been alone as a vampire. It hadn't bothered or hurt him nearly as much as the previous three weeks had. He felt like his unbeating heart had been ripped from his chest and stomped on. He'd never felt as empty as he did now, alone, without his mate. He had known he wouldn't be able to handle being around his family. Not while he was feeling the way he was. So he'd traveled to Alaska, to visit the other vampires he, Carlisle, and the others considered family. He still had to contend with Carmen and Eleazar, as well as the newly mated Kate and Garrett, but there was so much empty wilderness around their home in Denali that he could go days without seeing or hearing anyone, human or vampire.

Until Tanya, one of the unmated sisters, decided to intrude on his private space, like now.

"Edward," she said as sank gracefully into the snow beside him.

Tanya and her sisters, Irina and Kate, were all blond, all gorgeous, and all smart, interesting women. The three of them had been vampires for nearly a thousand years. They were thought to be the originals behind the myth of the succubus. They were friendly and loved to flirt, and all had tried many times to become Edward's first. Irina and Kate had long since given up, but not Tanya.

_Eleazar said your little human was back home,_ she said in her mind. She smiled, although to him, it wasn't a happy one—more like a little snarky and sarcastic. Her next thoughts confirmed that. _Now you can go on with your life. Loosen up and have some fun without worrying about the human child, right?_

When he didn't say anything, she set her hand onto his thigh, squeezing before sliding her hand up until Edward put his on top and moved hers away.

_C'mon, Edward. Surely a little fun in the snow will help take your mind off things._

"Tanya," Edward sighed, tugging at his hair. "You're a beautiful woman, but I'll say it again: I'm not going to sleep with you. She may not know it, but she's my mate and she owns my heart. I can't..." He huffed. "I just can't."

_You're going to be alone the rest of your existence if you feel like that. You know that, right?_

Edward hesitated and then nodded.

Tanya sighed. _All right. You know where I am if you change your mind...and I won't stop trying, just so you know._

"I know," he murmured with a small smile and shake of his head.

She got to her feet in one smooth motion and squeezed his shoulder before leaving him to his peaceful quiet.

* * *

_A/N: Okay, so Bella's alive and she didn't have to be changed. (Did you really think I'd kill her or change her into a vampire at not even fifteen years old?) I warned most of you in review replies that this Edward is VERY canon for a while, and part of that is leaving. I will say now that you should buckle up, because it'll be a bumpy road for a bit, and both of them will tug at your heart strings. ;)_

_Now, in case you didn't get it from this chapter, here's the answer to the big question so many of you had from chapter two: He left her where she was for that long for two reasons: 1) he didn't want to risk injuring her further while she was doing okay. Yes, she could have been injured further when rescuers got to her, but then she would be minutes away from the emergency response team and the hospital. Until it became immediate, he didn't want to risk it (you'll actually read that here in the chapter, but I wanted to explain it a little more in-depth here), and 2) There was a part of him that didn't want to take the chance of exposing himself (*laugh*) to Bella and any rescuers who might have seen him. That was secondary, though._

_Okay, so, Bella's on the mend, Edward has left not only Bella, but the family. I'd love to hear your thoughts on that and where you think it'll go next. ;) Leave me a message, and I promise to get back to you!_

_And be sure to check out drotuno's Masen Manor if you haven't already. It's fantastic!_

_I'll see you next Wednesday! – Jen_


	5. Chapter 4

_A/N: You guys are so great. I love all your theories and questions, and I am giddy over every review. So thank you so much. A bit of a time jump here—which will happen several times over the next few chapters, just FYI. So read on, and enjoy! :)_

* * *

**Chapter Four**

Bella flipped the cover back on her notebook and clicked to dispense her lead. Ignoring the soft music being piped over the speakers in the corners, she tucked her head into her chest and closed her eyes, letting her memories wash over her.

Messy reddish-brown hair, almost the color of a new penny. Thick eyebrows over worried eyes. A nose, not too big or too small, but with just the right amount of a bump to make it imperfectly perfect. Full lips set in a frown. Strong, square jaw.

She pulled lower lip between her teeth and began to sketch. It wasn't hard for Bella to capture the image from her memories. She had a notebook full of them already—some in color, some in pencil, some in charcoal...but all of Edward. It was the one thing that kept her from going crazy, from letting the other memories of that day drag her into the abyss of depression.

Deep in concentration, Bella startled when a hand landed on her shoulder.

"Bella?" the receptionist said, and when Bella looked up, the woman looked concerned. "Are you all right? I've called your name three times, hon."

Bella felt her cheeks heat and quickly closed her notebook. "Sorry," she mumbled. "I...kind of lose track of where I am when I'm drawing."

The woman chuckled. "Better that than the video games and cell phones my kids are glued to." She shook her head, smiling when Bella did. "Anyway, Dr. Phelps is ready for you."

"'Kay."

Bella clipped the pencil back to the notebook and stood. She followed behind the receptionist, who continued on to the front desk, leaving Bella to cross the rest of the waiting area for the open office door. She'd been seeing the psychologist for three months and knew the routine well after all that time.

"Bella," Linda greeted, smiling warmly. The pretty redhead, about Bella's mother's age, stood from behind her desk. She was a thin woman, with a smattering of freckles and an easy smile, and Bella had liked her instantly.

"Hi." Bella smiled shyly and sat down on the loveseat against the far wall of the small room.

As soon as she was settled, Linda sat in the chair across from her. "How was your week?"

Bella shrugged, fiddling with the notebook's metal spiral binding. "Okay." When Linda didn't say anything, Bella added, "The nightmares are still happening. I had one Tuesday night..." She shook her head, biting her lip.

Linda frowned, nodding. "Can you tell me about it?"

For a moment, Bella felt herself drift as darkness threatened to overwhelm her. Memories assaulted her, and she gripped the edge of the cushion as she began to tell the doctor about the nightmare.

"It always starts the same: I'm falling into darkness. Sometimes I can pull myself awake before it goes any further." Bella huffed a breath. "Not Tuesday..."

_Darkness engulfed Bella so intense that it felt like it was crushing the life out of her. She tried to scream, but it was quickly swallowed by the dark. She was falling...falling...until she wasn't. She landed with a loud crash on something hard, and pain shot through her. When she opened her mouth to scream, nothing came out. All around her, she could hear others as they called out for help, begging someone to help them._

_She recognized Sarah's voice, and then Ashley's, as they screamed in pain, calling for someone to find them. Bella tried to move, to get to them, but she couldn't. She was trapped, unable to move or speak, as her friends' cries got softer and softer, until finally, they quieted altogether. She screamed in her mind for them to wake up, to tell her they were okay, but got no reply._

_Then she heard it...the groaning of concrete and metal as it gave way. Just before the debris crushed her, Bella woke up screaming, sweat drenching her night clothes and sheets._

"My mom came running into my room just a few seconds later," Bella said to finish the story. "She changed my sheets while I changed clothes, but I couldn't get back to sleep."

"Does that happen every time?" Linda asked. "Not being able to get back to sleep, I mean."

Bella shook her head.

Linda nodded and glanced down at the notepad in her lap. "And how are your days? Have you had any more panic attacks?"

"They're better." Bella flexed her fingers around her notebook, to assure herself that it was still there. "I'm not having nearly as many panic attacks as I was. When I start to panic, I think of my angel, Edward, and his voice telling me to breathe, like he did when I was trapped."

Frowning, Linda said, "Bella, we've been through this."

Knowing what was coming, Bella steeled her resolve.

"Edward isn't real," Linda continued. "Your mind made him up to help you cope—and that's okay. It was a hard time for you, physically and emotionally."

Bella knew there was no point in arguing. Linda hadn't believed her the first time Bella had told her about Edward, and she knew that nothing she said would sway the doctor. Instead of commenting, she just picked at the corner of the notebook.

"I see you're still drawing," Linda prompted. "Is it helping?"

"It is," Bella answered, trying to find words to explain why. "It..." She shrugged. "It helps."

Linda smiled. "Good. Now, let's talk about how things are going at school. Are you feeling any better about it?"

Bella fidgeted in her seat as she thought of how to answer. "I hate being there. I'm still the new girl, and I'm...here, but Sarah and Ashley, who were friends with most everyone at school since kindergarten, aren't. I know they hate me because of that."

"Has anyone said that?"

Shaking her head, Bella answered, "No, but I know they're thinking it."

"As we talked about last time, survivor's guilt is common for people who've directly lived through a trauma like you did. You need to remember that you were injured—badly—and nearly died yourself. I know you don't have casts on anymore, but you're still dealing with some breathing issues, and your leg still aches sometimes, right?"

At Bella's nod, the doctor continued. "Yes, compared to Sarah and Ashley, you were lucky." When Bella started to protest, the doctor silenced her with a look. "You were lucky, Bella. Had rescuers not found you when they did, you would've died."

"Edward..." Bella's voice trailed off when the doctor raised an eyebrow.

"Time's just about up, Bella. Remember, it's only been three months, so be patient, okay? You're getting better. You'll continue to get better, and eventually, you'll realize the truth: You're strong enough to face this without leaning on a made-up memory."

_He's not made-up,_ Bella thought, but she kept her mouth shut, aside from telling Linda goodbye.

It took her only minutes to set up her next appointment with the receptionist, and on her way down the hall to meet her mom in the lobby, Bella thought once more about Edward.

_He's real. Linda is wrong. Everyone's wrong. The connection I felt to him, how safe he made me feel... It was real, and I know it._

She clutched her notebook tight against her chest and stepped into the lobby, sighing when she spotted her mom. Ever since that day in September, she felt anxious in public buildings, especially without her mother by her side. Like everything but the nightmares, it had been getting better, but therapy days made everything worse, including the panic attacks.

Her mom smiled and wrapped an arm around her shoulder. "How'd it go?"

"Fine." Bella didn't say anything more, even though she knew her mom wanted more details than _fine._

Frowning, her mom sighed. "Let's go home."

Bella felt the tightness in her chest ease a bit as they walked through the door and out into the cold winter's day.

~oooOOOooo~

Edward flipped slowly through the pages of his notebook, looking at the images he'd drawn of Bella's face. His mate. Even after three months, the thought of her still sent a pang through his chest. He never would've thought he could feel the way he was about a human—and a fifteen-year-old girl at that. He'd worried about that part until he'd spoken to Carmen, who'd asked him a simple question:

"_What are your feelings about the girl?"_

_Edward sighed. "I love her."_

_Shaking her head, his friend said, "Explain further."_

"_The moment I looked in her eyes, I knew I would do anything to protect her, like she became my whole world."_

_Carmen nodded. "And if I said you had to kiss her today?"_

_This time, Edward grimaced. "I can't, Carmen. She's just...she's just a young girl."_

_Smiling, Carmen patted his cheek. "There you go, Edward. You love her, yes, but not in a sexual way. Don't you see? If you'd met her a few years from now, sure. Could it grow into that if you were together now? Sure. But for now, you as her mate mean you want to keep her safe—which is what you did. She's home with her parents, alive and healthy, and that's because of you. You did what a mate is supposed to do. Don't worry so much."_

Carmen had been right about Bella. She was alive and healthy—he'd asked Carlisle to keep an eye on her until she was released from the hospital, and he had. So Edward knew Bella was where she was supposed to be, and that thought comforted him...at least a little.

But he was still without his mate. Every part of his being itched to go to her. His instincts were screaming at him that only he could protect her like she needed. But his mind was at war with itself, because while he wanted to go to her, he also knew that she was better off if he stayed far, far away from her. His world was _not_ one that she belonged in. As much as he wanted her by his side, he would not be the one responsible for taking her humanity and everything that went with it.

Edward looked at the last picture he'd drawn and saw everything he remembered reflected back at him: cute little up-turned nose; cupid's bow upper lip; eyes—deep brown pools in real life—filled with fear and pain... He suddenly knew what he wanted—needed—to draw.

He grasped his pencil lightly and made quick work of the shape of Bella's face, slightly full with youth, with high cheekbones. He added her lips, upturned into the smile she'd graced him with a few times during their hours together. Instead of the scared, hurting eyes he'd drawn for the last three months, he thought of her when she'd smiled through the pain, how there'd been a light there that was missing when she wasn't smiling. He wanted to capture that fleeting expression to remind himself that she was more than the fear and hurt in all his previous images.

When he finally set his pencil down, he took in the drawing, his eyes flitting over every part of it. Bella was smiling, and her eyes... He'd captured them exact to his memories. She looked happy, alive...as if she knew she had a future to look forward to, a family.

He thought of the picture he'd drawn on Bella's cast. His Little Bird, so fragile, yet not. Thanks to the many nights he'd had without sleeping, Edward had known the perfect bird to draw. Swallows meant protection, warmth...home. Everything he wanted for Bella. If he had his way, he'd have that tattooed on his body as a constant reminder of his mate.

For a moment, he wondered if that were possible. He knew regular needles wouldn't work—they wouldn't pierce his marble skin. He'd heard of vampires in Europe experimenting with things like titanium needles and the like, but he hadn't heard about the outcome of those. Maybe he could try that with some ven—

His phone rang before he could finish his thought.

_Alice._

"It won't work, Edward," she said before he could even say hello.

"What won't?"

"The titanium needle. You would heal before any venom had a chance to work."

Deflated, Edward nodded, even though she couldn't see him. "Okay. Thanks, Alice." He started to hang up the phone, but Alice's voice stopped him.

"Wait, Edward," she rushed to say.

Edward waited.

"I'm sending you a text with a phone number."

Again, he waited, and she continued, as he'd known she would.

"It's a handheld laser that will be strong enough to sear the skin, like a brand."

Edward immediately began picturing himself firing a laser at his chest, above his heart.

Alice gasped. "Water. You'll need to use plenty of water...and go low and slow."

He chuckled wryly. "I guess I don't need to ask what'll happen if I don't?"

Alice hummed. "Probably not."

"Thanks, Ali." He waited until his sister replied before clicking off the call and swiping to open her text message and immediately dialing the number.

~oOo~

Edward hissed, clenching his jaw so tightly that he was afraid he might shatter his teeth, and slapped a handful of snow to his chest to stop the burning before running a venom and ink-covered finger across the scarred skin to give it color. The metal-based ink helped keep the venom from dissolving it like it would have regular ink.

"Not much more," Garrett said, sounding amused. _Better him than me,_ he thought, smirking when Edward's eyes rose to meet his.

"Just get on it," he growled at the other man. He liked Garrett, despite the man's snarky attitude, and was thankful when he'd volunteered to help.

A few minutes later, Garrett set the laser down as Edward slapped another handful of snow to his chest and ran his finger through the mixture and across the line on his skin one last time.

"How's it feel?"

"Like I threw myself in the fire." Edward gritted his teeth as the burning feeling slowly eased. "Better."

Garrett reached into his back pocket and pulled out a small make-up compact. "Borrowed this from Kate." _You can either use it to powder that pale face or check out my handiwork. Your choice._

Edward took the mirror with a roll of his eyes—Garrett reminded him so much of Emmett, which made him want to smile—and popped it open, lowering until he could see the entire thing.

Garrett had done a phenomenal job copying the image Edward had drawn out for him. The small swallow looked like it was floating in the wind, its wings spread. The image had been burned into his skin. Edward's venom mixed with the ink gave it some color and had helped seal it all up, leaving a scar that looked like a cross between a tattoo and a vampire's bite.

It was exactly what Edward had wanted. His Little Bird flying free, without a care in the world.

* * *

_A/N: So time is moving on. Bella's in counseling, but she's still adamant about Edward being real, and she can't stop drawing him. Edward... *sigh* The tattoo... I couldn't NOT do it somehow. Mimi Holmes helped me come up with the laser idea. To see a manip that Bethany did of Edward's tattoo, check out my site (link is on my profile), Facebook, or Twitter._

_Don't forget to check out drotuno's Masen Manor. It's brilliant, with an Edward you'll want to climb like a tree. ;)_

_Next update for ALitD is next Wednesday, so please, leave me a review and let me know what you thought! I love each and every word of them! Mwah! – Jenny_


	6. Chapter 5

_A/N: You guys constantly blow me away with your love for this story, and we're only on chapter 5! There's so much, much more to come. :)_

_Answer to the guest reviewer: Cell phones were a lot newer then, but they were around. And it's fiction, so a little creative license. ;) Also, they stopped at the 20th floor to use the bathroom, so the rest of the class had plenty of time to get completely out of the building before anything happened._

* * *

**Chapter Five**

"What about this one? I think these would look pretty on you."

Bella looked over at her mom, who was holding up a flowy purple skirt and peasant blouse. She shrugged. "It's okay. I'd rather have jeans."

Her mother huffed, shaking her head. "You can't wear jeans all the time, Bella. You're getting ready to turn sixteen. You need to learn to dress up a little, to be a little girly. You want the boys to call, don't you?"

"Okay, Mom," she said with a sigh. "I'll try them on."

Her mom smiled, making Bella feel bad that she wasn't more enthusiastic. As she took the clothes her mother was holding out for her, Bella mustered a smile before moving into the dressing room.

Once she'd changed, she had to admit her mom had been right. The style flattered her figure, and the colors looked good against her skin. And it wasn't all bad. It was a skirt, but it wasn't too short or tight, and it was comfortable.

"Let me see," her mom said, poking her head in.

Rather than berate her about privacy, Bella shook her head and turned, letting her mom see it all.

"Perfect!" She held out a handful of items on hangers. "Take those off and try these on, too."

Swallowing back the eye roll, Bella simply took the clothes and gently pulled the door closed, shutting her mother out of the dressing room.

Two hours later, Bella had more new clothes than she knew what to do with. She'd insisted on adding jeans, T-shirts, and simple cotton undergarments to the skirts, blouses, dresses, and lacy bras and panties her mother had made her try on and then added to their "to buy" stack.

"Can we go home now?" Bella asked as she exited the dressing room. She needed to use the bathroom and was in the middle of a good book she wanted to read more of.

Her mother laughed. "No, silly! I need some new clothes, too. I told you that."

Bella dutifully followed her mom up to the women's dresses, trying to ignore the fact that they were on a higher level than she liked to go.

_It's fine, Bella,_ she repeated over and over in her head. _Nothing's going to happen. Remember what Linda said. You're safe._

Ever since the attacks, she'd been afraid to go into tall buildings, and while the Macy's wasn't the tallest building in the city, the seventh floor was higher than Bella was comfortable. She still wasn't sure why her mom had insisted on coming to the big Macy's, but Bella had been unable to talk her out of it, so she was trying to make the best of it.

After thirty minutes of watching her mom pick out clothes, Bella needed a break. "Mom, I'm gonna find the bathroom, okay?"

Her mother nodded distractedly as she held up a dress for closer inspection.

Bella made her way through the crowd to the escalator. She wanted to go away from the upper floors before her anxiety got the better of her. When she got to the second floor, where she knew the ladies lounge was located, she sighed as she realized there was a line of no less than twenty women waiting. Instead of stepping into line, she decided to ask where another restroom was located.

When the salesman said there were restrooms on the fifth and seventh floors, Bella shuddered. She didn't want to go back up there.

"There's also one in The Cellar," the man said, smiling pleasantly. He gave her easy directions to find it, nodding when Bella murmured her thanks.

The basement wasn't any better than the top floors, but by that point, Bella didn't have much of a choice. She wouldn't be able to wait until they got home, especially since she knew her mom wanted to look at shoes, too.

Hurrying down to the lowest level of the store, Bella was glad to see no line for the women's restroom. She rushed into the stall, already feeling like the walls were closing in on her. By the time she got to the sink to wash her hands, her breaths were coming faster, like she was trying to suck up every bit of oxygen she could.

Looking up into the mirror, she gasped as memories slammed into her.

_She, Sarah, and Ashley were standing in front of the mirrors. There was a huge thud, muffled but still the loudest thing Bella had ever heard in her life. The room shook, and they all screamed as the lights flickered and then went out, leaving them in total darkness until an emergency light came on in the corner._

Bella backed away from the sink until her back hit the wall, and she sank to the floor. Curling in on herself, she drew her knees to her chest and wrapped her arms around them as memories continued to batter at her mind.

_The walls began to shake, the floor under her feet rolled so hard that they all fell to the ground, and a noise much louder than before—sounding like bending and screeching metal—began, and the next thing Bella knew, she was falling into blackness._

Unable to move, barely able to breath, Bella began to sob. She tried to remember Edward's voice, to picture his face as he reminded her to breathe and told her that everything would be okay, but she couldn't. The harder she tried, the hazier her memories became and the more she couldn't breathe.

Somewhere in the back of her mind, she heard a door open and close, women's voices, and then nothing. Through it all, Bella's terror grew until black spots began dotting the inside of her eyelids and she felt like she was going to pass out.

And then her mother was there, wrapping Bella in her arms and murmuring softly into her ear. Bella allowed her mom to help her to her feet and guide her from the bathroom, but her shaking and tears didn't slow until she got her first breath of fresh air as they stepped outside the store.

~oooOOOooo~

Edward stuffed headphones into his ears and turned up the sound on his music as loud as it would go, wincing as it blared out. It wouldn't damage his ears, but it was still gratingly loud. At least it drowned out much of the audible sounds of his family in the throes of passion. It had started with Alice and Jasper, which wasn't unusual, and spread from there when Jasper was unable to keep his gift to himself.

It had been an adjustment living with the three couples again after...her. He'd lived with Eleazar's family for a while, but he'd spent most of his time out of the house. A month after Garrett had given him the tattoo, the rest of Edward's family had moved up to Alaska. On Alice's recommendation, they'd built a house about ten miles from their Denali cousins, rather than staying with them, which was what they normally did. Edward was sure she'd suggested it for him, but she'd never said and she'd kept any thoughts about it hidden from him.

When Edward could no longer ignore the voices in his head, he slipped out the window and jumped to the ground. Maybe hunting would keep his mind off what was going on in the house and the fact that he had no one of his own.

Out in the middle of the forest, Edward took down a bear, fat from foraging for the upcoming winter, and drank until he felt almost sloshy. After leaving the body where animal scavengers could find it, yet it was hidden from any possible human hikers, he climbed a tall tree and settled into the topmost branches. Unlike winter, summer in the Denali National Forest was a mix of colors—greens, yellows, reds, and more. Edward didn't see the beauty as he always had. He saw a vast emptiness, echoing what he felt in his heart.

The house was quiet when he returned. Only Alice remained.

_Carlisle and Esme are visiting Eleazar and Carmen, and Rose went with them to see the sisters,_ Alice said in his head. _Emmett and Jasper are hunting._

"Thanks," he murmured.

Edward jumped in the shower and washed the dirt and leaves from his hair. When he came back out of the bathroom in his jeans and tugging on his T-shirt, Alice was sitting on his bed.

"We need to talk," she said.

When he raised an eyebrow, Alice simply opened her mind and let him see the vision playing out.

"No!" he snarled, curling his hands into fists at his sides. "I won't do that, Alice."

Alice had shown him booking a plane ticket into New York City a few days before the anniversary of the terrorist attacks and then finding Bella's apartment, waiting, watching to catch a glimpse of her. He refused to let that come true. He wouldn't disrupt her life. He wouldn't be her downfall.

Turning, Edward moved to the closet as Alice gasped.

Her voice was sad when she spoke. "You can't go..."

"I have to," he argued. "I can't stay. I'll go overseas. Maybe visit some of Carlisle's old friends." _I'll be far enough away from Bella to keep her safe,_ he thought, but didn't voice it aloud.

As he was stuffing clothes into the luggage he'd pulled from the closet, she said in a small voice, "At least wait until Carlisle and Esme get back. You'll break her heart..."

After a moment, his shoulders slumped as he nodded. "All right. I won't leave until I've said goodbye."

Alice smiled sadly and handed him a T-shirt.

~oooOOOooo~

Bella shuffled her books as the bell rang and then stood, listening to the chatter that instantly filled the classroom and spilled in from the hall when the door was opened. Only one more class and she'd be free for the day—and one day closer until the end of her sophomore year. It couldn't come fast enough. Her mom had promised they'd go to Florida in the upcoming summer. Bella was looking forward to the beach and getting away from the city for a while. Sometimes, it felt like all the buildings were pressing in on her from every direction, smothering her. She hadn't had a panic attack in weeks, a nightmare even longer than that, but the city was stifling and made it hard to breathe sometimes.

She followed a group out of the room to head to her last class. They were talking about some party they were going to that night, one to which Bella hadn't been invited. That was okay with her. She had friends, girls she sat with at lunch, but she wasn't close enough with anyone to get party invites. Most had long since stopped giving her the cold shoulder because of Sarah and Ashley, but Bella was quiet enough that no one paid much attention to her at all.

As she walked down the hallway, she noticed one of the counselors and an assistant principal walking toward her. Behind them were a small group of kids that Bella didn't recognize. She realized they looked young, and the way they were watching the students in the hall and looking around at the classrooms told her they weren't high school students. Orientation for the eighth graders, she realized. The students that would be coming into the high school the next year as freshmen.

As they began to pass her, Bella recognized a girl with long, straight dark brown hair.

Sarah's sister.

Kaycee was watching her through narrow slits as she glared at her. It didn't surprise Bella. The only time she'd seen Kaycee since the attack was at Sarah and her mother's funeral. Bella had been released from the hospital the day before, and she'd insisted on going, so her mom and Phil had taken her. They'd sat in the back row of the church, since Bella had been in a wheelchair still, and when it had come time to pay their respects to the family, she'd asked her mom to take her up to see Mr. Peters and Kaycee. Mr. Peters had cried and accepted her mother's hug, but when Bella had looked over at Kaycee, the girl had almost flown into a rage, hitting out at Bella and yelling and screaming that it wasn't fair that she was alive and her mommy and sister weren't. Bella had left immediately, calling out that she was sorry, and had cried for hours, until her exhausted body had fallen asleep.

Nineteen months hadn't done much to change Kaycee's feelings. Bella didn't know if she could deal with seeing that look every day, but more than that, she hated knowing that every time Kaycee saw her, Bella would be a living reminder that she'd lived and Sarah hadn't. It had been hard enough dealing with the other kids at school. She didn't know if she could handle it from Sarah's sister.

Bella was even more quiet the rest of the day, unable to get Kaycee off her mind. From the moment she walked in the door from school, her mother could tell something was wrong, and three times before dinner, she asked Bella if she was okay. The final straw came during dinner.

"Bella, please tell me what's wrong. Talk to me, honey. You'll feel better..."

Frustrated, Bella threw her napkin down on the table. "I wish you'd quit asking me that!" She pushed her chair back from the table hard enough that it screeched across the wood floor. "I told you I didn't want to talk about it, but you keep pushing and pushing! If I wanted to talk, I'd talk." Barely registering the hurt on her mother's face and confusion on Phil's, she muttered, "I need to be alone," and then almost ran for the silence of her bedroom.

When she got to her room, she decided to take her mind off everything by studying for the English quiz she had the next day. Bella sat down at her desk, but before she could open the book, her cell phone rang. Looking at the caller ID, Bella smiled. It had been a couple of weeks since they'd talked last, and he was just the thing she needed after such a long, crappy day.

"Hey, Dad..."

~oOo~

Three hours later, dressed in her pajama pants and tank top, Bella felt determined as she stepped into the living room.

"Mom?"

Her mom looked up from her spot on the couch. Her eyes were sad, which made Bella's heart pang, but it also told her that she was doing the right thing.

"We need to talk."

* * *

_A/N: So...Bella had a not-so-slight freakout. Understandable, right? I know several people mentioned not being able to go in tall buildings after that, but basements would be just as bad, I imagine._

_I know you probably wanted more Edward this chapter. He will have more soon. You can see where Bella's headed, right? ;) It'll be a bit until Edward & the others are there, too, so please keep that in mind. :)_

_If you haven't yet checked out Drotuno's Masen Manor (why not?), be sure you do so! It's brilliant—one of my favorites since Angelward. *swoon* You can find a link on my favorite authors. :)_

_Now, leave me some love and tell me how mean I am for torturing Bella, or grinch about how I should've let Edward go check on her. Whatever floats your boat. ;)_

_See you next Wednesday with another update! Mwah! – Jen_


	7. Chapter 6

_A/N: Thank you guys so much, yet again, for your fantastic response to the last chapter. So many of you guessed where we were heading, and yes, you're correct. Bella is heading to Forks. :) Not a lot of questions from last time (although the amount of vitriol I got for Kaycee was astounding... Remember, people, she's YOUNG and hurting. The way she acted toward Bella is completely in the norm for someone who has been through what she went through, losing her mother and sister in a tragedy like 9/11. Saying that she should die? Totally not cool.), so let's get on with it. :) See me at the bottom!_

* * *

**Chapter Six**

Shouldering her backpack, Bella took a tentative step forward in the aisle of the plane. Her body was stiff and sore from sitting for so long during the nearly six-hour flight from New York. She was lucky, she supposed, that weather didn't seem to affect her now-healed bones like it did for some people. She had some Tylenol in her suitcase if she needed it later, but for now, just walking for a few minutes would help.

She followed the other passengers from the plane, and when she stepped into the brightly lit airport, she blinked a few times. Pulling her phone out of her pocket, she turned it on and smiled when she saw a message from her dad.

_Waiting at Baggage Claim._

That was Charlie. Short and to the point. She loved him for it, and it was one of the reasons she'd decided to make the move to Washington.

Bella began the long walk from her gate to the lower level, feeling her muscles loosen and the stiffness in her leg begin to fade as she got closer to the baggage claim area. When she made her way through the crowd, she heard her name.

"Bells!" Charlie's voice called out, and she looked up to see her father smiling her way.

"Hey, Dad." She accepted his hug, holding on tight and breathing deeply. Still the same woodsy with a hint of peppermint scent that she'd grown used to over the years. Ever since her father had quit smoking before she was born, he'd liked to suck on the little mint candies, and it had left him smelling like the sugary treats for as long as she could remember.

"How was your flight?" he asked, but continued without giving her a chance to answer. "Two bags, right?"

"Yes, two, both with a red ribbon tied around their handle so we can see them...and the flight was good. Long."

Charlie nodded and led her over to the correct carousel for her flight. He watched the luggage as the conveyor belt began to move. "How's your leg? I have some aspirin in the car if you need it."

She shook her head. "It's okay. Was a little stiff, but walking helped."

Instead of saying anything more, he nodded again and then reached out to snag her first suitcase as it went by.

Smiling to herself, Bella realized once more that she'd made the right decision. Charlie knew how far to push. If her mom had been the one to ask, she'd have pushed for more details—how bad the pain was, where it hurt, if she'd tried walking around on the plane...—until Bella had gotten frustrated and angry. She knew her mother loved her and worried, but Bella was tired of feeling like she wasn't normal or that she was a little girl who couldn't take care of herself.

She and Charlie were quiet as he grabbed her other suitcase and they walked out of the airport and to the parking garage. When her dad led her down the aisle closest to the entrance, she groaned.

"Dad..." Bella grimaced. "You had to bring the cruiser?"

"Sorry, Bells. I know you hate it. But I came straight from work." Charlie's mustache twitched, and he grinned. "At least you get to ride up front..."

She chuckled. "There is that."

The ride to Forks was long and punctuated with short conversations about the high school and needing to register for the next year, what had been going on at work, and Charlie's friends, Billy and Harry.

Bella looked around when they finally pulled up at the small white house that she had lived in for the first two years of her life, before her mother had packed up her things and Bella and left her husband. It seemed like not much had changed since she'd last visited, except there was a new coat of white paint on the outside, and the green trim looked fresh, as well.

Charlie carried her luggage into the house, even though Bella told him that she could take one of them. He waved her off and jerked his chin to tell her silently to go ahead of him. She led the way up the stairs and into the first room at the top, which had been hers when she was a baby and then every time she visited. When she stepped inside, she had to smile.

"You redecorated..."

He shrugged, his cheeks turning a light pink. "It was time. Sue—Harry's wife—and daughter helped me out with the colors and bedding. We can change them if you don't like it..."

Bella took in the purple hues, the new double bed, desk, and dresser. "No, it's great, Dad," she said, feeling her eyes well with tears that she quickly blinked away. "Thanks...for all this"—she gestured around the room—"and for letting me come live with you. I needed..." She cleared her throat around the sudden lump there. "I needed away from the constant reminders of that day. I know Mom loves me and has just been worried, but the constant questions about whether or not I'm okay is just another reminder. And I know that Mom worrying about me isn't good for her relationships—with Phil, her friends..." She shook her head. "Whether she can admit it or not, this move was best for both of us."

Charlie reached up and smoothed his mustache with his thumb and forefinger, a sure sign of his emotions and nerves, before he spoke. "I've never been...comfortable talking about feelings and all that jazz," he admitted, making Bella smirk inwardly, "but I trust you to tell me if you aren't okay. I'll respect your feelings about the constant questions and worry if you promise me that much."

"I promise," she said quickly.

"Good." He turned to leave, but then paused in the doorway. When Bella raised an eyebrow in question, he asked, "I left a driver's license handbook in the desk for you. Your mom said you still don't have your license, but I'm assuming you'd like to learn?"

Bella nodded, a grin spreading across her face. "Yeah, there wasn't much need for it in New York."

His mustache twitched, showing his amusement. "Study that, and then I'll teach you."

"Thanks, Dad."

Charlie nodded once and then turned and moved to the stairs, leaving Bella to unpack.

~oOo~

Bella tugged her coat on and followed Jessica and Angela from the school. Jessica was chattering away about Mike's plans for Homecoming. Bella couldn't help but laugh. She'd become fast friends with Jessica and Angela over the summer, even though the thought scared her. The last time she'd made friends at a new school, they'd been killed just a few months later. But she was glad she had. They couldn't be more different—Jessica was loud and excitable, while Angela was quiet and shy—but they'd been friends since grade school and had accepted Bella right away when Jessica had come in to visit Mike at work. Bella had just started working at Mike's parents' sporting goods store, and he'd been training her, so he'd introduced her. Jessica had invited Bella over to hang out with her and Angela that night, and they'd been friends since.

"So..." Jessica drew out the word as Bella stepped up beside them. "Dress shopping tomorrow in Port Angeles?"

"Yeah, I'll drive," Angela said. "Unless we wanna ride in Bella's truck."

Bella laughed at the look of dismay on Jessica's face at the thought of riding in Big Red. Charlie had given her the truck for her birthday, after she'd gotten her license in August. "Don't worry, Jess," she teased. "I won't make you suffer like that."

Jessica looked relieved. "I tried to get my mom to give me back my car for the weekend, but she said no. I still have two weeks to go until I get it back." She grimaced. "Stupid speeding tickets."

Bella and Angela grinned at each other, and then Bella waved and split off from the pair. Angela was driving Jessica home, and Bella was going straight to the grocery store. Jake and his dad, Billy, were coming over for dinner, and Bella had promised herself that she would make something other than fish.

~oOo~

"How's the truck?" Jake patted the fender as he and Bella walked past it to the edge of the yard. "Giving you any trouble?"

Jacob Black was two years younger than Bella, but already, he was a whiz with cars. He was currently restoring an old Rabbit for himself to drive when he was old enough, and he'd been the one to fix up the truck for Charlie. He was a sweet guy, and at first, Bella had been worried that she'd have to worry about him flirting with her, but he had a crush on a girl named Vanessa from his school on the reservation, so they'd become friends and hung out whenever their dads got together.

"No, it's been great." Bella smiled and tugged her coat closed. It was the beginning of October and getting quite cool at night. "Runs like a dream—as long as I don't go over sixty."

Jake laughed. "Yeah, that's the problem with trucks this old, unless you restore them more than your dad wanted. Woulda cost a lot more, though, and for now, you don't need the power."

She snorted. "You sound like him..."

He grinned. "I should. That's pretty much what he told me when he asked me to work on it."

Bella nodded, believing that completely.

They walked along the edge of the yard that bordered the forest, quiet for a moment, until Jake stuck his hands in his pockets and looked over at her. "So hey..."

"Yeah?" she asked after a minute when he didn't continue.

"I've never asked you this...and if you don't wanna talk about it, that's cool...but what was it like? I mean, how did you keep from freaking out while you waited to be rescued?"

Bella's thoughts immediately flashed back to those hours in the wreckage, and she felt her heart rate climb and her breathing quicken. In her mind, Edward was beside her, holding her hand and keeping her calm.

_No, Bella,_ she hissed in her head. _Remember part of why you wanted to move here? To get over Edward, who you had to have made up, like everyone said. He's not real._

The problem with that was...deep down, her heart and soul knew he was real, but her head kept trying to convince her otherwise. She knew she'd be better off if she could convince herself that he wasn't real, just so people would quit looking at her strangely when she told them about him.

Rather than voice any of that to Jake, she consciously forced herself to relax and muttered, "Distractions."

Jake started to ask something else, but Bella shook her head, and he frowned and nodded once before changing the subject.

"I think Vanessa likes me..."

~oooOOOooo~

Edward listened as the music flowed from the piano, both delighting and cursing him all at once. He'd hummed the song to Bella while keeping her company that day in the rubble, and since then, he'd turned the melody into a full-fledged composition on the piano. It was a comfort, reminding him that she was out there somewhere, living her life, but it was also his punishment...a reminder that he couldn't be with her, that his drawings, the tattoo, and the lullaby were all he had of her.

It had been two years since that fateful day. He'd spent nearly a year traveling, a lot of it in London, a month on Isle Esme off the coast of Brazil, and had finally come back to the States just over a month ago. His family had moved to Portland a few months before Edward had moved back. Carlisle and Esme had bought a home just outside the city, and because it sat on nearly twenty acres of land, Edward had asked if he could build something for himself on the back of their property. He couldn't live with the family again. Not yet. He'd barely been able to speak to Carlisle and Esme on the phone. Being around the others was too...much. It made him even more angry, more sad, than he already was.

Being without his mate was killing him bit by bit, he was sure. He only fed when he absolutely needed to, in order to ensure the safety of any humans who ventured too near his little cabin. He knew Esme especially worried for him, but he'd promised her that he wouldn't go to the Volturi. The one time he'd thought about that—right after Alice had had the vision of him going to New York to see Bella—Esme had been near hysterical at the thought, and when she called him, shortly after he'd arrived in London, he'd sworn to her that he wouldn't even entertain the idea again.

His mother, for all intents and purposes, had wanted him home again, but his little cabin, a little over a mile from their home, was as close as he could get without losing what little sanity he had left.

Edward cursed himself as his fingers slipped on the keys and then started again, closing his eyes as he pictured his Little Bird.

His solitude was interrupted a few hours later by a knock on the door. He stood abruptly, the bench for the old upright piano he'd tucked away in the corner of the cabin scraping against the crude wood floor. He'd been so caught up in his thoughts that he hadn't heard his sister's approach.

_Let me in, Edward,_ she said in her head. _You know I'll stay here until you do._

With a sigh, Edward strode to the door and flicked the lock. "As if a locked door would have kept you out," he muttered.

Alice, who was conjugating verbs in French in her head, shrugged, pushing past him and looking around before turning back to him as he shut the door.

Through her thoughts, Edward looked at himself. He'd been alone so long and he hadn't put any mirrors into the cabin, so what he saw shocked him. He had dark purple circles under his eyes—a clear sign that he'd gone too long without hunting—and he looked...tired. There was no other way to put it. He was thinner than normal, so much so that his cheekbones were prominent, and his shoulders were hunched, like the weight on them was too great to hold himself up straight.

He closed his eyes and turned away. "What do you want, Alice?"

"The family misses you," she said without apology. "Esme misses you."

"I'm here, aren't I?" he snapped, flinching when it came out harsher than he'd intended. "I could've stayed in London."

Alice sighed, coming up to him and putting her hand on his arm. "I know it's hard, being around everyone—"

"You don't know, Alice," he growled, shaking her hand off. "You have no idea. You have Jasper. Emmett has Rose. Carlisle has Esme. I don't have..." He let his voice trail off as the ache in his chest grew.

His sister frowned. "Edward, you know it doesn't have to be that way."

He gripped his hair and tugged. "Yes, it does. I won't condemn her to this life. She's only seventeen, and she deserves better."

Alice frowned. "I can't change your mind, can I?"

Edward shook his head without looking at her.

With a sigh, Alice wrapped him in a fierce hug, and then she was gone before he could take another breath.

* * *

_A/N: So Bella's in Forks and Edward's...brooding, for lack of a better word. I KNOW most of you don't like Emoward, but a) this is pretty canon, and b) trust me, it has to be this way for it to work out how it works out later. It WILL veer from canon for him. I'll spoil and tell you that. So how he feels now may not be how he continues to feel later—although yes, for a few more chapters, he'll be Emoward. ;) As to Bella, she's in an infinitely better place, being in Forks, than she was in New York, what with all the reminders everywhere. So yay! ;)_

_Okay, leave me some love and then head over to drotuno's Masen Manor if you haven't yet! It's fantastic. :)_

_I'll see you next Wednesday. Mwah! – Jen_


	8. Chapter 7

_A/N: I say it every time, but thank you guys so much for all the sweet words. I love the love you have for this story! Just a quick note: You have to remember that Alice hasn't met Bella. So until Bella does something to put herself on Alice's radar, the pixie won't see visions of her. At the end of the last chapter, she simply wanted to hide exactly why she was there: to talk about the family missing him. He hasn't been very receptive to that stuff, so she knew if she didn't keep it from him until she was inside, he wouldn't let her in. :) Okay, so...another small time jump here, but I think you guys will be happy with this chapter, so I'll let you get to it. :)_

* * *

**Chapter Seven**

Two weeks after the Homecoming dance, Bella was on Jake's couch, reading through her history report assignment. Charlie was with Billy at Harry's house, watching football, and Bella had come with him to help Jake with his English and to grill him for her report. They'd been able to pick their own subjects from a list the teacher had given them, and Bella had chosen the history of the Quileute Tribe, which had settled in Washington in the middle of the 1800s.

"Tell me about the history of the tribe," she requested.

Jake smiled and puffed up his chest. "It all started with Kahelaha, the First Spirit Warrior," he began.

For fifteen minutes, Bella jotted down notes about the tribe and its history, including how it came to be in the present.

"You mentioned the bonfire..."

Jake nodded. "The elders love to gather the young tribe members and tell stories—the legends of our tribe."

"Legends?"

He laughed, shaking his head. "Yeah, like the Quileutes survived the Great Flood by tying their canoes to the tops of the tallest trees on the mountains to survive."

"Oh, like Noah and the ark?" Bella grinned.

"Yeah," he agreed. "Another says we're descended from wolves. Even now, It's against tribal laws to kill them. Supposedly, our ancestors have been able to transform into giant wolves—like werewolves—the size of bears or horses or something...but no matter how hard I try, I've never been able to do it." He squeezed his eyes closed and tensed his muscles for a moment, sighing when nothing happened. "See? It sucks!"

Bella laughed. "Anything else?"

Jake looked around furtively and his voice was nearly a whisper as he said, "Well, there are the stories about the Cold Ones..."

Amused, Bella played along, hunching over and leaning in to speak as quietly and furtively as Jacob had. "Cold Ones? What are they? Zombies?"

He chuckled and sat back. "According to the legends, my great-grandfather, Ephraim Black, knew some of them. He was the one who first made the treaty with them." He rolled his eyes. "Again, according to the legends, the Cold Ones and the werewolves are natural enemies and had been for a thousand years. But the Cold Ones that came to this land and met my great-grandfather were supposedly different, so my great-grandfather made a pact—a treaty—with their leader, Carlisle."

Bella jolted at the name. Something was pinging in her subconscious, but she filed it away to look at later. "What was the treaty?" she asked, scribbling notes as fast as she could write.

Jake explained about how the tribe would keep the Cold Ones' secrets if they promised to stay off Quileute land.

"If they weren't dangerous, then why worry about them coming onto the land?"

He shrugged. "According to my great-grandfather, they're safe until they aren't. Even the civilized Cold Ones could be tempted."

"'Civilized'?"

Jake snorted. "According to their leader, they didn't hunt humans. They preyed on animals instead—which is easy, I guess, since they're apparently super strong or something."

Again, Bella's radar was pinging, but she kept her voice even as she asked, "How can you tell if a Cold One is 'civilized' or not?"

"I dunno." He shrugged. "Legend says their eyes are different or something. Not the freaky red ones like the others, but not like yours or mine."

Images of beautiful, warm, golden eyes flashed through Bella's mind. She pushed the memory aside and asked, "And what are they? The Cold Ones, I mean."

"Blood drinkers," Jake replied with a grin. "Your people call them vampires." He shook his head and picked up his soda, taking a big drink before setting the can back on the table in front of them. "But of course, none of it's true. They're just stories that get told around the campfire and shared down from generation to generation."

Bella nodded, chewing on her bottom lip as she made notes at the bottom of her notepad.

_Carlisle._

_Super strong._

_Golden eyes._

_Cold Ones = cold skin?_

After a moment, she added one last note:

_Edward._

~oOo~

For several days after her visit with Jacob, Bella thought about his story. She bought colored pencils at the store on her way home from school and, from memory, drew her doctor at the hospital in New York. She wasn't sure she'd gotten it all exact, but his eyes... His eyes were definitely different than hers or anyone else she'd ever met—except Edward.

She couldn't get over the memory of his lifting the beam and concrete from her body, as if they'd weighed no more than a loaf of bread. Jake had told her the Cold Ones were strong enough to take down a bear or a giant wolf.

She didn't remember how cold Edward's touch had been—she'd been so cold already, given that she'd been in shock—but Dr. Cullen's had been shockingly cold the first few times he'd touched her when he'd checked on her injuries, until she'd gotten used to it.

Surely the tribe's legends couldn't be real, could they? Men who shifted into wolves the size of horses? Vampires? But somehow, Bella knew they had to be. It would explain so much about those days in the rubble and after, in the hospital.

If Dr. Cullen was the Carlisle in Jake's legends, then he had to be the same Carlisle that Edward had called his father. Their last names were different, but then, that wasn't totally unusual in today's world, and especially not if they were...vampires. It was that, or Edward had lied about his last name. Either way, Bella was determined to find them.

That night, Bella decided it was time to do some research. Her laptop was open as she dropped onto the mattress, settling in under the sheet and propping her laptop up on her knees as she leaned back against the headboard. Opening the browser, she typed in vampires. The first few pages of search results were a bust. _The Lost Boys, Interview with a Vampire,_ Anne Rice, the new Charlaine Harris Southern Vampire Mysteries series, Dracula... Not what she was searching for. She pulled her lower lip in between her teeth as she thought for a minute about Jacob's stories. As soon as the idea came to her, she reached up and typed in "cold ones," in italics. The title of the first result gave her hope.

_Quileute Tribe of the Northwest_

She quickly clicked on the link and opened the web site. Scanning through, she saw many of the stories Jake had told her: Kahelaha, the First Spirit Warrior; Taha Aki and his three wives; canoes tied to trees. Nothing about being descended from wolves or about the Cold Ones.

Clicking back to the search results, she continued looking, gaining hope when she saw lots of references to words like "immortal," "blood drinker," "demon," "strong," and "beautiful." An image of Edward's face, then Dr. Cullen's, flashed through Bella's mind, and she smiled. That last one certainly fit them both. Neither of them had looked or acted like a demon, though she supposed if it were like Jake's stories, not all vampires were civilized, so maybe some of the uncivilized ones were more like demons than not.

Bella felt her heart skip a beat when she found a promising link buried in the middle of the tenth page of search results. It was another page for Quileute legends, but this one was nowhere near an official-looking page like the last one, and one of the phrases underneath the link was "descended from wolves." She quickly clicked on the link.

There it all was, in black and white. Every one of Jake's stories, including being descended from wolves and the Third Wife sacrificing herself to save her sons as they killed the Cold Woman. There was still no mention of the treaty Jake had told her about, and no mention of the name Carlisle, but there was a description of the Cold Ones: cold, pale skin of marble; red eyes; unnatural beauty; and a supernatural speed and strength.

Substitute gold eyes for red, and it was an almost perfect description for Edward.

Grabbing her notebook of sketches from the locked drawer of her bedside table, Bella quickly wrote down everything she'd learned. Then she turned back to the computer and continued to look around the web site. There wasn't a lot more information that she didn't already know, but there was a link to a group on Facebook. When she clicked on it, it took her to an open group called "Believers in the Supernatural." The description read: _If you are a true believer in the supernatural—angels, demons, vampires, ghosts, witches, psychics, and more—feel free to join. We welcome everyone with an open mind to things of the unknown._

Bella quickly clicked the button to join the group. She wasn't sure she would learn anything new, but maybe someone else would have stories about vampires that would help lead her to Edward.

"Bells?" her dad called, knocking once on the door just as Bella was ready to start reading through the messages on the group's page.

"Yeah, Dad, come in." Bella closed the laptop and smiled when her dad opened the door and poked his head in. "What's up?"

"I'm heading to bed," he said, giving the clock a pointed glance. "Don't you have that biology test tomorrow?"

Startled, Bella glanced at her bedside clock, shocked to realize she'd spent two hours on the computer. "Yeah, I'm going to bed now. Thanks. I got caught up in what I was reading and didn't notice the time."

"G'night, Bella," her dad said, waiting until she'd echoed him before he reached up to flip the switch for the overhead light.

When he'd closed the door, Bella set the computer down on the floor, leaning it up against the bedside table, and then turned on her alarm before turning off the small lamp next to her bed. Her mind was a whirlwind of information as she closed her eyes and burrowed under the covers.

~oOo~

The day after Bella's discovery of the Quileute legends web site and the Facebook group, she was sitting at lunch with Angela and Jessica, and she couldn't help but bring up the topic of the supernatural.

"Do either of you believe in ghosts and angels and...and vampires and stuff?"

"My grandma's house is haunted," Jess gushed, reaching up to open her milk. "Like...seriously creepy—noises in the attic and walls, and I swear I've seen a shadow at the end of the hall when I visit."

Bella looked at Angela, who grinned and shook her head before turning back to face Bella.

"I'm...not sure," Angela said with a shrug. "Ghosts and angels, maybe. Vampires?" She made a face. "I dunno, Bella. That's kind of...Hollywood, isn't it?"

"Yeah," Jessica interjected. "_The Lost Boys_..." She sighed dreamily. "Michael..."

Bella forced a laugh into her voice. "Yeah, you're right."

Angela raised an eyebrow. "Why?"

Trying to sound casual and uninterested, Bella said, "Just something my friend Jake was telling me about the other day." Deciding it best to change the subject, she said, "You guys wanna come over and study for the math test after school?"

The Facebook page saved on her laptop would have to wait.

~oooOOOooo~

_Edward, we have to talk._

Alice's voice echoed in his head, but Edward ignored her, as he had the last three times she'd showed up at his cabin.

_It's important._

"Is someone dead?" he asked without glancing up from the piano keys as he played.

_No, but—_

"Then I don't wanna hear it."

He waited, and moments later, Alice growled and left.

~oOo~

Two days later, Edward finished burying the bear he'd drained and began the long run back to his cabin. He must've been distracted, because until she stepped into his path, he hadn't heard Alice coming—literally or in his head.

He sighed. "Alice," he groaned, spinning and scrubbing his hand over his face.

He loved his sister, he really did, but he needed to be alone. His voice alone was all he could stand to hear in his head. In a way, the silence made him feel closer to Bella.

"I'm sorry," she finally said, stepping in front of him so he was forced to look into her eyes. "I tried to tell you before, but you wouldn't listen."

Edward shook his head. "And I don't want to listen now. I love you...I love the others, but I need time."

"Bella—"

He flinched at the sound of her name. "Don't," he growled. "I don't want to hear again that I'm doing the wrong thing, that I deserve to have her in my life. I can't—"

"Bella left New York, Edward."

Edward froze. After a moment, he said, "Where?"

Alice shook her head. "I don't know. I didn't see that. I only saw that she'd left New York and was looking up information on vampires, which leads her to trying to find Carlisle."

Fisting his hands in his hair, Edward sighed. "Show me..."

At the sight of Bella—looking infinitely more mature and even more beautiful than he remembered—Edward's dead heart cracked wide open, and the pain he'd been holding in came spilling out as he fell to his knees.

He had no idea how long he was down on the floor. He vaguely remembered Alice leaving the cabin. His heart felt battered and his mind was numb when he finally became aware enough to hear a knock on the door and then Esme's voice as she opened the door without waiting for him to answer.

"Oh, Edward," she sighed, rushing to him. Before he could protest, she pulled him up and into a hug, nearly crushing in its intensity. "Come, son. Sit down. It's time we talked."

He raked a hand through his hair, but followed her dutifully back to the couch, where he took a seat next to her. No matter how bad he was feeling, he couldn't take it out on Esme, who'd been a source of motherly concern and love for over eighty years. He could tell from the sadness in her eyes just how much his absence from the family had hurt, and he hated it, but he wasn't sure she'd be able to get the answers she so obviously wanted.

"Esme, I don't want to talk—"

"Good," she interrupted. "I don't want you to. I want you to listen." When Edward shifted, she said softly, "Please, son. For me."

Edward swallowed the protest he'd been about to give and nodded, trying not to flinch at the relief that slumped Esme's shoulders.

"I love you, Edward. You're my son, just as much as if I'd given birth to you myself."

She got a faraway look in her eyes for a moment, but in her mind, she was thinking of what she and Carlisle were going to do on his next day off, so he couldn't tell what she was hiding from him.

"I was young when I first met Carlisle." He opened his mouth to speak, but she shook her head. "I know you know the story, but give me some leeway, please." When he didn't say anything, she continued. "I was only sixteen when I came in to the hospital with a broken leg. I was...crushing hard, as teenagers might call it nowadays, on my doctor by the time I was discharged. He was handsome, an older man—much too old for me. He was so very kind, so very gentle as he tended to my leg.

"He left a month after I was discharged from the hospital—I learned later that he'd wanted me to have a normal life, and I was still a child in his eyes, so he walked away, even though he knew I was his mate. I didn't see him again until years later, of course. By the time he found me after I jumped off the cliff, I was so near death, he wasn't sure I'd make it, but his venom healed my body as his love healed my soul."

"Esme..." Edward started, shaking his head. "I know all this. What—"

"Patience, Edward," she huffed. "I'm talking about fate. Fate brought me back to Carlisle—or rather, fate brought me to Ashland, and fate brought Carlisle to the bottom of that cliff to find me.

"Look at what your siblings all had to go through to find their way to each other. Poor little Alice... Her parents put her in a mental hospital, and she was changed and left all alone to find her way as a newborn by herself. Jasper fought so hard, it left him physically and emotionally scarred. Emmett was mauled so bad by a bear that he was barely alive when Rose found him. And Rose... Rose had not only her heart and spirit broken, but her body, as well, by the man she loved."

A deep sadness came into Esme's eyes then, and Edward wanted to look away at the pain that flashed through her mind.

"My son...he was an innocent little boy, and he deserved a long, happy life, but he died. I was so distraught, I threw myself from the cliff." She shook her head slowly, and when she looked at him again, her eyes were clear, her thoughts strong. "But in each and every instance—with Alice and Jasper, Emmett and Rose, and Carlisle and myself—fate intervened and brought us to the person that would love us with their whole heart, cherish them, and make them whole again."

She reached over and took his hand. "As much as you want to stay away from Bella, to give her a full, long, human life, you can't control fate."

"I can," Edward said firmly. "I'll stay out of Bella's life."

"I understand, son. I truly do. But you need to realize that fate may not give you that choice. Just look at what happened two years ago. Fate brought you to that moment in time, at that exact place, to find a young woman who needed you. Even then, fate was intervening."

Edward frowned. "Maybe," he agreed, "but I don't have to make it easier on fate by voluntarily putting Bella's life in danger by being part of her world."

_Come out, come out, wherever you are, Edward._

Edward heard Emmett's voice in his head moments before he heard him and Jasper walk up to the cabin.

_Come join us for a hunt, Ed,_ Jasper thought quietly.

"Regardless of fate, Edward, you can't hide from the world." She smiled sadly. "We love you, and we miss you."

Edward chuckled along with her as Emmett and Jasper echoed her from outside.

"Yeah, dude, we miss you!" Emmett called.

"What they said," Jasper said with a laugh.

Esme got serious again when she turned back to him. "Can you at least try to spend a little more time with everyone? Go for a hunt with the boys. Carlisle's planning on meeting them out there when he gets home from the hospital."

_Please, Edward. It would mean so much to all of us, and I truly believe it will do you a world of good._

At the hopeful look and the silent pleading in her thoughts, Edward nodded. The smile and sheen of unshed tears made Edward realize he needed—and wanted, if he were honest—to spend more time with his family. He needed his own space still—those reasons hadn't changed—but he'd missed them all.

When Esme stood, Edward stood as well, and he pulled her in for a tight hug, whispering, "Thanks, Mom."

Esme smiled, cupping his face for a moment, and then gestured to the door with her head. "Go on. I'm going to go back to the girls while you boys hunt."

Edward smiled back at her and then turned for the door.

* * *

_A/N: Eek. We're getting there... Bella has a plan of action, sort of, and Edward is slowly returning to the land of the...well, not living, but close enough. ;)_

_And yes, I know Facebook wasn't around back then. Call it...creative license. ;D_

_Show me some love and let me know what you thought of Jake & the legends, Bella's plan for Facebook, and Esme's talk with Edward._

_I'll see you next Wednesday! Mwah! – Jen_


	9. Chapter 8

_A/N: Once again, you guys are blowing me away with your response to the last chapter. Thank you. :) It's because of all the love that you're getting an early update! :) Now, one quick thought since so many of you asked this: No, the Volturi aren't behind the Facebook page. You'll see why that isn't even a concern pretty much immediately in this chapter, but I wanted to address it directly. :) Also, remember... The Cullens aren't in Forks...yet. ;) Obviously it's safe to say that they WILL be in Forks, and soon. Heh Right now, they're living in Portland, Oregon, which is a little over four hours from Forks. So they won't accidentally run into each other or anything like that. But I promise you, things start to change THIS CHAPTER. So enjoy! See me at the bottom for a couple of important things._

* * *

**Chapter Eight**

Bella leaned back against the headboard and scrubbed her eyes with her hands. She was tired and frustrated...and getting nowhere in her search. Three days, and none of the posts she'd read had been helpful. There was a lot of talk about ghosts, psychics, and fairies. Even zombies. And unsurprisingly, there were a lot of posts about vampires. But most of the vampire posts made Bella cringe and roll her eyes. All the normal vampire legends were there: turn into bats, sleep in coffins, are repelled by garlic, burn in the sun, and have fangs. Some even claimed they themselves _were_ vampires. It was all ridiculous...and that thought made her laugh out loud.

_As if believing vampires exist isn't crazy all on its own?_

Sitting up, she put her hands on the keyboard and began typing.

"Does anyone believe in vampires that _aren't_"—she stressed the word as she said it aloud, even though that wouldn't come through on Facebook—"Hollywood or literature-based? Bats? Coffins? Garlic? Seriously?"

Frustrated, she shut the lid to the laptop in disgust. She needed to step away from the computer before she said something she would regret.

Setting the machine over on the bedside table, she opened the drawer and pulled out the framed picture that she'd kept with her for over two years. Amazingly, the drawing looked just as good as it had when she first laid eyes on it in the hospital. It had held up well. When the doctor cut her cast off, she'd asked him to cut the image of the bird in the wings out for her to keep. It had been drawn on the top of her arm, so flattening it out had been easy, and keeping it in the frame with the glass over it had kept it clean. She traced her finger across the glass, following the strokes from the marker Edward had used. A small bird wrapped in angel's wings. No matter how many times she'd tried, she'd never been able to replicate it. She'd come close, but then she'd quit trying. Nothing she could draw would top it, so why try?

She was still studying the drawing a few minutes later when she heard her dad call up from downstairs that he was home with dinner. Still holding the drawing, she slid off the bed and looked down at the bedside table. Beside the lamp was an open spot, and when she set the frame down, it fit perfectly.

Giving it one last look, she smiled and then turned to leave the room.

~oOo~

Between homework and work, Bella didn't have a chance to look at Facebook again until two nights after her message on the group. Her phone had nearly blown up with the number of replies she'd received, and as curious as she'd been, she'd decided to just wait and read them on the computer. Once in the group, she scrolled down to mid-page to find the right message.

Seventy-three replies.

"Holy crow," she breathed, shaking her head. She'd had no idea there'd been that many.

Settling into her desk chair, she began to read. Most of the messages were rather rude—although in their defense, Bella knew she'd been rude herself, so she supposed it was justified—and sarcastic. A few were even downright hateful. One or two agreed that the bat theory was a little out there, but they believed everything else. The ones that made Bella laugh were the ones from people who claimed to be vampires themselves. They were the same people she'd read in the other posts.

Not one of the seventy-three replies was from someone who agreed with her about the Hollywood tropes.

With a sigh, she moved up to the message that had come in that morning. Bella didn't recognize the name—Ali Brandon—and when she hovered over it, she didn't recognize the girl in the photo. She turned her attention to the chat window.

_Hi. You don't know me, but I'm in the group for the supernatural with you. I believe in a lot of supernatural things—vampires, werewolves, psychics—but I agree with you about Hollywood being a bunch of made-up stuff. I mean, bats? That's pure fiction, isn't it? Silly. You asked about vampires. I think vampires blend in well with humans when they want to. Otherwise, how would they keep their existence secret? Anyway, I'd love to chat more! I gotta get to school, but if you want, friend me, and we can talk._

There was a sticker underneath of an adorable, round, purple blog-like creature, its eyes squinched and its mouth turned up in a smile. Bella couldn't help but chuckle.

Bella quickly clicked Add Friend and then messaged Ali back.

_Hi. How cute! I love that little guy. Yeah, the bats one cracks me up. And sleeping in coffins? I mean, I get that, if they have to stay out of sunlight for some reason, they would have to find someplace dark to sleep, but a coffin? That's just... I don't know. It seems very fiction, not fact. And I agree about them blending in well with humans. I think they can look and act very similar to us._

_Do you think you've ever met a vampire? I'd ask out in the group, but...they kinda scare me. ;)_

This time, Bella clicked on the sticker of another blob—a gray and black with big blue eyes that looked a little frightened.

_I'd love to chat more. :)_

Seeing that Ali wasn't currently online, Bella closed the computer and went to fix dinner for herself and Charlie.

Before bed, Bella's phone dinged, and when she saw that it was a notice from Facebook, she grabbed her laptop and hopped on to the site. Ali had messaged her and accepted her friend request...and she was online.

_Maybe,_ Ali had written. _There were some kids at my old school that might've been. They never ate lunch. They kept to themselves. They seemed a little odd and really different._

Bella bit her lip and began typing. _Were they really pale and gorgeous?_

Ali was quick to reply. _They were, yeah. And when I passed papers to one of them in class, their hand was always so cold! I just figured they had circulation problems. What about you? Have you ever met anyone you thought was a vampire?_

Bella thought about what to tell Ali. She'd never given anyone more information than just Edward's first name when she'd told them he'd rescued her. For some reason, keeping secret anything else he'd told her just felt...right.

_I think I have,_ she typed out slowly. _I think I've met two._

_Wow, two? Who? Where?_

_Um, a couple of years ago, where I used to live._ She didn't want to give any more than that away—at least, not yet.

_Oh, you moved? I've moved a lot (my dad likes to transfer jobs every few years), and we just moved to Portland, Oregon, last year._

Bella gasped. Ali was close—very close. Portland was only four or five hours away, if she remembered right. She checked her profile, but she'd left her location blank, so there's no way Ali could've known. Grinning, she typed out her reply. _Portland? Wow! I live in a tiny little town a few hours west of Seattle. We're almost neighbors._

She put a happy smilie sticker underneath.

_LOL We are neighbors! That's so cool! I've got to go, Bella. My brother wants to see what I'm doing, and I don't think I want him to. He's so nosy, always wanting see my thoughts. I'll talk to you later!_

_Cya, Ali._

~oOo~

The next week and a half sped by. Bella was happy to chat with Ali a few times throughout the week. She wasn't sure what to think of the other girl. Ali had made hints about being able to see the future, and while Bella was more open to the idea now than she'd been before Edward, there was still a part of her that wasn't sure if she was experiencing wishful thinking about him and Dr. Cullen—and if she was, then Ali was probably just a little loony. But if she were right, then who was she to say that vampires were real but psychics weren't? Regardless, she needed to talk to someone, and Ali had an open mind.

_Hey, you around?_ she messaged her new friend.

_I am! What's up?_

Bella decided to be honest, without naming names. She told Ali about being in the World Trade Center that day two years before and about being trapped, and how the most gorgeous boy she'd ever met had been there when she'd woken up.

_Wow. I'm so sorry. :( I can't imagine how hard that was. Was he in the tower when it fell, too?_

_No,_ Bella wrote, and she took a deep before continuing. _He was there searching for survivors, I think. He talked to me and kept me calm for hours. If it weren't for him, I'd be dead._

When Ali didn't say anything, Bella went on. _I started feeling worse, and he lifted a steel beam off my legs and a concrete block off my stomach and chest. I saw him, Ali! He lifted them like they were nothing more than pillows or something. Then he must have carried me through the rubble until the rescuers could get to me, because I was told I was much closer to the surface than I know I was before then. I don't know. I passed out. But I know he saved me, even though no one else ever believed me._

It was another minute before Ali finally replied, and Bella felt like she held her breath the entire time.

_I believe you. I think there are a lot of things in this world that we can't explain. He must've been very strong to lift that stuff off you, and no human could've done that._

Bella nodded to herself and typed quickly, _And then...I think I met his...father? It sounds crazy, but I think his father was my doctor when I got to the hospital. See? I KNOW it sounds crazy! I mean, what kind of vampire is able to work at a hospital, around all that blood? But...they looked alike and both of them were cold to touch, even though it didn't bother me. Do you think I'm crazy? Like, totally bonkers?_

Again, it took a minute before she replied, but Ali's message put Bella's mind at ease.

_No, I don't think you're crazy. Bella, I'm psychic, remember? I believe in a lot of things that people would call me crazy about. Have you tried to contact your doctor? Maybe just come out and ask him?_

_I...I haven't,_ Bella admitted. _I guess I was a little afraid to? I don't know._

_Afraid? Of the doctor? If he'd wanted to kill you, he could've done it while you were there in the hospital, right?_

_Afraid of his reaction if I ask if he's a vampire, I think?_ Bella snorted. _Silly, I guess. He can always just tell me no, even if he is. I wouldn't know any different._

_I don't think it's silly. But I think you'll be fine if you call the hospital and look for him, Bella, really. Like you said, even if he is, if he doesn't want you to know, he'll just say no._

Bella smiled. _Thanks, Ali. I do feel better. I'll do that now, and then I've got to go. I'm going to the movies with some friends later, so I promised my dad I'd study for my Biology quiz._

_Let me know how it goes, and have fun tonight! My family and I are going camping tomorrow, so I may not be on for a few days. But leave me a message. :)_

Bella typed out her goodbye and told Ali to have fun, and then she closed Facebook and opened up Google to find the number for the hospital in New York.

It took a moment after she dialed to realize a woman had answered the phone. She only caught the second half of the sentence.

"...how may I help you?"

"Uh, yes, hi. I need to speak to Dr. Cullen."

There was silence for a second, and then the woman said, "I'm sorry, but there's no one named Cullen on staff here."

Bella shook her head. That couldn't be right. She knew she had the name right...didn't she? "Um, okay, could you transfer me to the nurses' desk in ICU?"

"Hold, please."

Some elevator-type music came on, and Bella sat drumming her fingers on the desk while she waited. Finally, a calm, older-sounding nurse picked up the phone.

"ICU, this is Sharon speaking."

"Y-Yes, hi," Bella stammered. "I...My name is Bella Swan. I was brought in after the...on...in September a couple of years ago. I was in the North Tower when it..."

"Yes, I understand," the nurse said, her voice soothing. "How can help you, sweetie?"

"I'm looking for the doctor that treated me when I was brought in. He...umm, did my surgery and then looked after me for a while until I was discharged." Bella felt her nerves ratchet up and began to babble, hoping the nurse wouldn't tell her to go away. "I never got to really thank him, and the therapist I'm seeing said if I could, that would be helpful. I'd really like to talk with him and tell him thank you for the good care he took of me after such a horrible—"

"What's his name, Bella?" the nurse interrupted calmly. "I'll help you if I can. Do you remember his name?"

Relief flooded Bella, and she sighed. "Dr. Cullen."

The nurse—Sharon—hummed for a second. "I don't think there's anyone here by that name. Are you sure you have the right hospital and doctor's name?"

"Yes, I'm positive," she said firmly. "I've spent two years remembering that day."

"I believe you." Sharon hummed again. "You know, we had a lot of visiting doctors in that day to help out. Maybe he was from another hospital. Do you remember what he looked like? I remember faces better than names sometimes."

Bella closed her eyes and thought about Dr. Cullen. "He was young—maybe late twenties, early thirties? Blond hair, really cute."

"Pretty eyes!"

Chuckling, Bella nodded to herself. "Yes, his eyes were really different."

"I remember him now." She was quiet for a minute. "I believe... I believe he was visiting from Rochester—Strong Memorial Hospital, if I remember right. He'd been in town visiting friends when the first plane hit, and he came here, offering his services as a surgeon."

"Thank you," Bella gushed, relieved to have someone else remember the kind doctor.

"It was my pleasure, sweetie. I hope you find him."

Bella hung up the phone and immediately searched on the laptop for Strong Memorial Hospital in Rochester.

The woman at Strong Memorial immediately knew who Bella was talking about when she explained who she was and why she was calling.

"Oh dear. Dr. Cullen doesn't work here anymore, honey. He and his family moved not too long after that day, if I remember right."

"Ohh..." Bella sighed. "I really wanted to thank him... Do you know where he moved?"

"I'm sorry, hon, I don't."

Just before Bella opened her mouth to say thanks anyway, the woman spoke again.

"You could try a search on the computer for Dr. Carlisle Cullen, though. That might pull something up."

Bella's heart skipped a beat. If her information was correct, then her Dr. Cullen was Jake's Carlisle...and Edward's, which meant he and Edward were both vampires. Shaking, she said quickly, "Thank you so much. I'll do that."

She hung up without waiting for a response.

~oooOOOooo~

Edward chuckled as Carlisle switched from reciting one of the medical books in his office to another, this one in Italian.

"It's keeping you out, isn't it?" Carlisle grinned and made the opening move in their second game of the day.

Nodding, Edward made a disgruntled face. "Chess is much more of a challenge when I can't see what move you're planning."

He couldn't help but shrug when Carlisle just laughed. Ever since Esme's talk in October, Edward had made an effort to spend time with the family, not only for their benefit, but for his. It had been the right decision. He still felt...off and lonely without his mate, but he no longer felt as adrift as he had. He knew that without Bella, he would never feel complete, but he had a family that loved him, and most of the time, that was enough. Barely, but it was enough.

He'd helped Esme in the greenhouse Emmett and Jasper had built for her, since it was the middle of winter in Portland and the flowers she wanted to plant needed more than the weather would provide. He'd hunted at least once a week with his brothers and a handful of times with the whole family. He and Carlisle had spent time each week playing chess and talking about some of the cases Carlisle had at the hospital. It all felt normal and took away at least a little of the ache of emptiness from inside Edward, for which he was grateful.

"I think Alice wants us to go pick a tree when they get home from school. Will you be joining us?" _It would mean a lot, Edward,_ Carlisle opened his mind to say.

Edward nodded. "Yes, she asked me yesterday. I told her I would."

Carlisle smiled and moved his pawn, capturing one of Edward's.

Play continued until his siblings' minds reached Edward's and the sounds of Emmett's Jeep on the driveway could be heard by everyone. Esme came into the living room and squeezed Edward's shoulder.

The four of them came in moments later, laughing and talking about their day. In a lot of ways, Edward missed being able to participate in those conversations, but he knew that being in high school again would only remind him of Bella and what he couldn't have. Maybe in time, he'd be able to handle that, but for now...

"Yo, Ed," Emmett called, tossing his bag down in the corner of the living room. "You going with us to get the tree?"

"Yeah. I promised Alice I would." Edward smiled at his sister, who beamed back at him.

"We'll change clothes and then be ready to go," Alice said, clapping her hands. "Edward, can you get the Christmas decorations from the attic?"

Edward nodded and looked at Carlisle. "Finish this tomorrow?"

Carlisle nodded. "Sure, son."

Two hours later, after everyone hunted, they gathered in the forest as Alice said to follow her. Having a psychic in the family took a lot of the fun out of trying to find the perfect tree, not that Edward would ever tell her that. Still, the fun wasn't in searching for the tree. It wasn't even in the cutting it down or the decorations. It was spending the time together that was important and fun, and Edward made a note to tell his sister that and to thank her for gathering the whole family together in times like this.

_You're welcome, Edward._

He smirked, shaking his head.

Under Alice's direction, Edward, Emmett, and Jasper carefully cut the tree down with the ax Jasper had brought, and then Emmett carried it with him back to the house as the seven of them ran the few miles home.

Once back at the house, Alice directed Emmett and Jasper into setting the tree in the stand—as if they hadn't done it enough times in their lives to know how it should be done—while Edward sat with Rose and Esme and unpacked the Christmas decorations and Carlisle started a fire in the fireplace. They didn't need the heat, but even Edward had to admit he liked the smell and the warmth it gave off was pleasant.

"I'm glad it's Christmas break," Rose said as she carefully pulled a delicate angel from the bubble wrap. She looked at Edward. "I don't know how you did it all those years. It's bad enough hearing their conversations. I can't imagine hearing their thoughts, too." She shuddered.

Edward smirked. "Yes, it can be tedious. Not everyone is like that, but a majority of high school students have banal, insignificant, and selfish thoughts. It's been nice having a break from it all."

Alice declared the tree ready, so Carlisle stood with the lights and offered the end to Edward, who stood and walked to the tree with him. Together, they wrapped it in the white lights that would twinkle and reflect off the windows and all the ornaments. As soon as the lights were on, Rose, Esme, and Alice began hanging the decorations, everything from the glass angel to handmade ornaments that Carlisle had managed to save from Edward's parents' things and ones that Emmett and Rose had both been able to sneak in and get years after their change. Jasper hung tinsel while Emmett helped Esme set out decorations around the house: wreaths on doors, garland around the banisters, a nativity for the fireplace mantel, poinsettias that Esme had bought the day before in every room, and candles scattered throughout the living room.

Once it was all finished, everyone stepped back to look, and even Edward had to give Alice credit. It was beautiful.

* * *

_A/N: Okay, so... Bella's now in contact with Alice, although she doesn't know that Ali is Edward's sister Alice. As for Alice... She knew that Bella's call to the hospital wouldn't result in much...except Bella now has another piece of the puzzle knowing that Dr. Cullen's first name is Carlisle, just like the Cold Ones in Jake's legend. I know Edward's part wasn't very long, but this part of the story, this part of their journey, is about Bella and her search for the truth, for Edward. I did want to show that he's making an effort into living and being normal—kind of like Bella tried in New Moon to be normal for Charlie after Edward & the Cullens moved away._

_Couple of big notes: One: I have a poll up on my profile about this story, and I'd like your opinions, so please, check it out & vote! :) Two: The Fanatic Fanfics Awards nominees have been announced, and I'm up for Best Beta for the first time, which is fantastic. Not only that, but In Pursuit by Sarge's Girls is up for Favorite Crime Fic. Also, Drotuno herself is nominated for several stories, and Beffers87—who does so many of my manips and banners—is up for several related categories. Voting starts 3/31, and there's a link on my profile, so please, check out all the nominees and then vote tomorrow! Deb, Bethany, & I would all really appreciate your votes!_

_Okay, leave me some love, and I'll see you back here on Wednesday! Mwah! – Jen_


	10. Chapter 9

_A/N: Once again, I have to say thank you for all the kind words of love you gave me for the last chapter. You guys are incredible. We're *thisclose* to 1000 reviews, which is so awesome! (By the way, in case you missed it, I did update this past Sunday as a treat, so be sure you read chapter eight! Now, I think you're all itching for this chapter, so I'll let you get to it. :) See me at the bottom!_

* * *

**Chapter Nine**

Bella got more and more discouraged as time went by. She'd been so hopeful before Christmas, when she'd found out Dr. Cullen's name and the hospital he'd worked for, but since that day, nothing had worked out the way she'd wanted it. She was no closer now, three months later, than she had been in December. In January, she'd even asked Jessica's cousin, Tommy, who was an officer in the police department, for help. She'd thought about asking Charlie, but she didn't want to worry him, so when she'd remembered about Tommy, who was always really friendly when she went into the station, she'd gone straight to him on a day that she knew her dad was out of the office.

_Bella poked her head into the small bullpen of the Forks PD. "Hey, guys." She smiled when the three officers looked up from the paperwork and whatever they'd been doing. "Tommy, got a sec? I need a favor."_

"_Sure, Bella." He nodded and motioned toward the observation room. "What's up?" he asked once they were in with the door mostly closed._

_Bella worried her bottom lip between her teeth as she sat in one of the two chairs at the back of the small room. "I... Can you help me find someone?"_

_Tommy's brow furrowed as he hooked his thumbs into his gun belt. "You couldn't ask your dad?"_

_Shaking her head, Bella frowned. "It has to do with...New York, and I don't want him to worry._

_Tommy looked pensive, but finally nodded. "Who?"_

"_The doctor who treated me at the hospital...after... Dr. Carlisle Cullen."_

_He looked like he wanted to ask why, but Bella was grateful when he finally asked instead, "You tried calling the hospital?"_

_Bella explained about her phone calls to both hospitals. "I thought maybe with, ya know, with your resources, you might be able to find him easier than I could."_

_Tommy nodded slowly. "I can try, but no guarantee since I don't even know what area of the country he moved to. If he hasn't committed any crime, I might not be able to find him, but I'll do my best."_

"_Thanks." Bella smiled and started to get up, but the look on Tommy's face stopped her. He truly looked worried. "Don't worry, really. I've been talking to some people, and they suggested that since I never got to thank him properly before I left the hospital, being able to do that might be a good thing."_

_His shoulders fell, as if the worry had been weighing heavily on him. "Ah. Good, good." He smiled. "I'll get on that right away and call you if I find something."_

_Bella left the station with a smile on her face, feeling hopeful._

Unfortunately, Tommy had been right in predicting that he might not be able to find Dr. Cullen. He'd called her a few days later and said he'd found no trace of the man, which he'd promised didn't mean anything. He'd said there were more intense searches he could try, people he could ask, but Bella had said no, that was okay. It had been worth a shot.

For over two months, she'd tried to put it out of her thoughts, concentrating on school and her friends, but she was feeling more and more discouraged. Angela and Jessica dragged her out as often as Bella would let them. And she and Ali had been talking almost every day and had grown close. But still, there was an ache in Bella's chest, an emptiness, that she couldn't explain and that wouldn't go away, whenever she thought of not being able to find Dr. Cullen...who was her best lead to finding Edward.

She was flipping through her sketch book, looking at the drawings she'd made in the months after the attacks, when her laptop beeped, signaling a new message. Setting the notebook aside, Bella pulled her laptop up to her on the desk and smiled when she saw the new message from Ali.

_You're gonna have fun on spring break!_

Bella laughed. Ali had more than proven that she was psychic. The first time she'd told Bella that she shouldn't get the normal pizza her dad liked, Bella had scoffed and ordered it anyway. Unfortunately, Charlie had come down with food poisoning and been sick for three days. Bella had been a believer since.

_What? Why?_

Ali put up a sticker of Snoopy doing cartwheels. _Cause your mom's coming into town and you guys are gonna stay in Seattle for the week and do the whole tourist thing. You're gonna love the Space Needle._

_If you say so,_ Bella typed, shaking her head.

Just then, her cell phone rang, and Bella grinned when her mom's picture came up on screen.

"Hi, Mom," she answered as she typed a message to Ali that she'd talk to her later.

~oOo~

"Are you still going out with Eric tonight?" Angela asked as she walked out of school beside Bella, who nodded.

"Yeah, he's picking me up at seven for the movie."

"He's been asking you out all year... What made you finally say yes?"

Bella shrugged. "My dad was worried about me. Jess is going out with Mike tonight, and you and Ben have plans, so..."

Jessica and Mike had started seeing each other at the end of January and had become inseparable. He'd had a thing for her for years, she'd said, but she'd finally given in and gone out with him, and much to Bella's and Angela's amusement, she was still in that "new relationship" phase, where she spent every waking moment with him. She hadn't been to a girls' night in months because of it, but Bella understood. Angela did, as well, since she was head over heels for her boyfriend, Ben, who she'd been going out with since freshman year.

Angela nodded. "We're just studying and watching a movie at home so I can watch my brothers while my parents go out. You were welcome to come over."

Grimacing, Bella chuckled. "And be a third wheel again? No thanks."

Her friend bumped her shoulder and then reached out and held her arm lightly. "Seriously, Bella. You're welcome to join us whenever, okay? But give Eric a chance. He's a nice guy. You might be surprised."

Bella smiled. "I will, Ang. Thanks. See you Monday?"

Angela gave her a hug and then hurried away to Ben, who was waiting by his car.

As Bella climbed in her truck, she thought about what Angela had said. Eric really was a nice guy. He was cute, in a dorky kind of way, and smart, with a dry sense of humor. But he was shy and hard to get to know, which was why most girls just tended to pass him by, especially since he was friends with the much more outgoing, All-American Mike.

After a quick dinner of leftovers, Bella washed the dishes and handed them to Charlie to dry.

"Go on," he instructed, gesturing to the stairs. "I'll finish these up. You've got a date to get ready for."

Bella smiled and thanked him before leaving the kitchen. She wasn't planning on getting too dressed up, but she did want to change out of the clothes she'd worn to school. She also wanted to send Ali a message before Eric got there to pick her up.

After changing into a new pair of jeans and a pretty green blouse, Bella brushed her hair out, added a clip to hold it up and out of her face, and then sat down at the desk and opened up her Facebook account.

Ali immediately popped up with a message. _Hey, aren't you supposed to be out on a date?_

Bella snorted. The girl knew everything. _I'm just waiting for him to pick me up. Tell me, oh psychic one... How long until he arrives?_

Ali's answer came immediately. _Ten minutes, fifteen seconds...no, make that eleven minutes. He forgot his wallet and had to run back in for it._

Laughing, Bella shook her head. _See? Plenty of time. I should've just canceled._

_Why?_

_Because my heart's not in it, Ali. I can't explain it. I don't know why my chest feels empty, why my stomach churns at the thought of going out with Eric, or Quil (who asked me again last weekend, by the way)...or anyone but..._

_But Edward_, Ali finished for her.

_Yeah, exactly. It...it feels like cheating. I know. That doesn't make sense. I met the guy once, almost three years ago. Who knows if I'll ever find him again and, if I do, whether he'll want me like I want him. I'm sure he's got some gorgeous vampire girlfriend, probably tall and blonde and stunningly beautiful, and he hasn't given the poor human little girl a thought since that day. But that doesn't stop my heart from wanting him. And, ya know, since Tommy couldn't find a hint about Dr. Cullen, my hope is dwindling that I'll ever find either one of them._

Ali was quiet for a long time, and Bella thought she'd disappeared, but she finally responded.

_I can't really tell you anything. I'm sorry. But I can tell you to not give up hope. Miracles happen every day. Fate... Fate might surprise you. It could still find a way to bring you and Edward together._

Bella shook her head. Fate. She wasn't sure she believed in fate. _Thanks for trying to help, Ali, but I think... I think it's time for me to make my own fate. Eric might not be Edward, but he's a nice guy. Maybe for my heart's sake, I should let go of the pipe dream._ As the doorbell rang, she quickly typed a goodbye. _I gotta go, Ali. If fate needs me, I'll be at the movies._

She shut the laptop without waiting for a reply.

~oooOOOooo~

Edward kicked out at Emmett from his position beside his brother on the couch. "Knock it off."

Emmett smirked. "What? I can't help it."

"Dude, not cool. I don't need to see Rose like that." Edward grimaced. "You're just trying to distract me so you can finally win one."

"Emmett..." Esme said sternly, smiling at Edward when he glanced her way.

"Aww, Mom," Emmett whined. He glared at Edward. "You got me in trouble." He shoved Edward, who saw his intention in time to avoid tumbling off the couch.

"Take it outside, boys. If you smash up my furniture one more time..."

"Sorry, Esme." Edward elbowed Emmett and turned back to their game.

It was August, and school was about to start up for his siblings. Rose and Emmett had spent the last month traveling, visiting some friends in Ireland. They'd just returned the week before. Alice and Jasper had stayed in Portland all summer, but they'd been gone for a few days, on a hunting trip up into Canada, and were due back the next day.

He was so caught up in the game a couple of hours later that their minds didn't register at first.

_Edward, family meeting. Carlisle's on his way home._

Edward looked at Emmett and Rose, who'd come down to watch them play and cheer Emmett on. "Alice and Jasper are almost home," he said, not needing to raise his voice for Esme to hear from the library, where she'd been reading. "She requested a family meeting."

"What about?" Rose asked, setting her magazine in her lap.

Shrugging, Edward finished off Emmett's character and ended the game, deftly hopping off the couch and away from his brother, who lashed out playfully. "Don't know. She didn't say, and she's hiding her thoughts from me."

Alice and Jasper came in minutes later. She was all smiles as she accepted a hug from Esme, but she still continued to keep her thoughts hidden by categorizing the clothes and shoes in her closet by color and season in her mind. Jasper looked happy to be home, but anxious as he gazed at his wife, which his thoughts confirmed to Edward, who raised his eyebrow at his brother.

_No idea, man. She wouldn't tell me. She got a vision earlier today and said we had to come home today, rather than when we'd planned._

No matter how much Emmett tried to get her to spill, Alice refused to tell them about her vision until Carlisle got home. "He'll be here in four minutes, seventeen seconds. You can wait," she teased, grinning when Edward snickered and shook his head.

Carlisle walked in the door just when Alice had said, and he took one look at everyone and made his way to Esme, sitting on the arm of the couch and putting his hand on her shoulder. His thoughts were a mix of joy at having his entire family together again and worry about what Alice had to tell them.

"Well?" Emmett prompted.

"We have to move," Alice said, finally allowing Edward to see the vision she must have had when she and Jasper were hunting.

_A red-haired girl—new at school, according to the whispers—with blue eyes, smiled shyly as she walked into Alice's science class. Alice stiffened in her seat, and Jasper, who was beside her, tried to catch her as she leaped at the girl. He was unsuccessful, and when Alice bit the girl, the scent of the girl's blood was too much for him. Between the two of them, they drained the entire class before Emmett and Rose stopped them._

Edward groaned, fisting his hair as he looked at Alice.

She nodded. "I think she's my singer," she said quietly.

"Would someone please tell us what the hell is going on?" Emmett growled, looking back and forth between them.

Alice explained to the others about her vision.

"What about just avoiding her?" Esme asked. _My poor, sweet Alice. That would wreck her...and Jasper. He's worked so hard and come so far..._

Alice thought to Edward, _Sorry, but it's not a vision I want to keep replaying,_ and then shuttered her mind as she had before. "I thought about that. No matter what I do, I still run into her and I still drain her." She frowned. "I thought about just not going to school, but I'd have to stay away from town for them to accept the excuse that I'd moved away."

Rose smiled at Alice and shrugged. "Well, it's not the first time, and it probably won't be the last," she said succinctly, and her thoughts were kind as they went back to the last time they'd had to move because of an accident: Emmett and a woman in Wisconsin back in the seventies.

Carlisle frowned and looked around at the family. _I hate to uproot the family once again..._

"Jasper and I can leave," Alice said when she looked at Carlisle. "That way you can stay at the hospital and Emmett and Rose can stay at school until it's time to move in a couple of years." She smiled at Jasper, who wrapped his arm around her, his thoughts agreeing that he'd follow her wherever she wanted. "We can go visit Carmen and Eleazar or go over to—"

"No," Carlisle interrupted. _I won't do that to Esme. I won't be the cause of the family being torn apart._ "No, we'll all move. We'll call the school and tell them we're moving and you won't be there this year. I'll tell the hospital a friend requested I come fill in for a doctor who just left their hospital and he needs me right away. We can leave in a couple of days."

Alice froze for a moment and then smiled, nodding. "I don't see a problem with that."

"Where should we go?" Rose asked. "Maine?"

"What about Forks?" Alice suggested. "We've never been there as a complete family. It's far enough from Portland and small enough to avoid running into anyone from here, and I'm enjoying the west coast."

"Works for me," Emmett said, smiling at Rose when she nodded.

Esme smiled, nodding. "Forks is a lovely little town. It will be nice to be back."

Carlisle looked at Jasper, who shrugged, and then at Edward. _What about you, son? Will you go with us back to Forks?_

Edward looked around at his siblings and then Esme, whose hopeful expression matched her warm thoughts, before finally turning his gaze back to Carlisle. "I'm in," he said, smiling.

~oOo~

The family had had enough practice that moving from Portland took them no time at all. They'd begun packing as soon as the decision had been made. Esme had called the school the next day to let them know that her "children" wouldn't be enrolling for the school year, and Carlisle had quit his job at the hospital the day after that. Edward had only taken half an hour to pack everything from his little cabin, opting to leave the small upright piano since Carlisle and Esme had kept his baby grand when they'd moved from New York.

"Wanna bet on who gets to Forks first?" Emmett asked, cracking his knuckles.

Edward smirked. He and Emmett had gone hunting the day before, but everyone else had opted to wait until today. Emmett was feeling awfully confident. It would be good to take him down a peg or two. "Yeah, sure. Terms?"

"I'd say winner gets to choose the loser's outfit for the first day of school, but the pixie would kill us...and you aren't going, so..."

Edward slid his hands into his pockets and leaned back against the car, popping his foot up behind him on the tire. "About that..."

Emmett's face lit up. "Dude, are you gonna go back with us?"

Shrugging, Edward looked off into the trees. "I was thinking about it." He'd spent enough time by himself that he'd begun to think he was going crazy. He'd been having conversations with Bella in his head at night, when he retreated to his cabin to let the others have their privacy.

"Awesome, Ed. Really." Emmett clapped him on the shoulder and smiled. "I know Ali's missed you. Hell, we've all missed having you there with us. It's a lot more entertaining when you can tell us what all the little humans are thinking."

Edward chuckled, and then his thoughts turned more serious. "I think I'll ask Esme to fix up the little cottage in the woods off the back of the house so I can stay there. I still..." He shook his head. It was hard talking about his feelings with his family, because he knew it made them feel bad, and he didn't want that. It wasn't their fault he was alone and they weren't. "I just need my space."

Emmett nodded. "I understand, man. We all do. You do what you need to do, and we'll all back you a hundred percent."

"Thanks," Edward said, and then he jerked his head to the side when he heard their thoughts in his head. "The others are coming back."

As soon as the others got close enough, Alice raced over to Edward and threw herself at him.

_I'm so glad you're going to school with us! I've missed having you there. I was going to say something, but Emmett beat me to it._

Edward laughed. "Yeah, it'll be...fun." As fun as school for the thirty-second time could be, he supposed.

"When I win," Jasper drawled, plucking his wife from where she was wrapped like a limpet around Edward, "you two have to actually eat lunch in the cafeteria—regular food from the lunch line, like normal students—every day for a week."

Emmett groaned. "That's just wrong, but since I don't plan to lose, I'm in."

"Me, too," Edward said, bumping fists with his brothers.

"Try not to get caught," Esme told them, rolling her eyes, although she couldn't hide the smirk, and her thoughts were full of love and amusement.

"They have to catch us first," Edward said, sliding into the driver's seat of his Volvo.

Just over two hours later, Edward pulled to a stop in front of the garage in Forks. Looking into the rearview mirror, he watched Jasper come into view in Alice's yellow Porsche. They were waiting on the porch while Alice opened up the house as Emmett came skidding around the curve of the driveway in his Jeep, a plume of dust rising behind him. His thoughts were sullen, and Edward couldn't help but chuckle.

"Come on, Em," he said as his brother got out and slammed the door on the Jeep. "Don't be such a sore loser."

"I had to stop for gas in that little hole in the wall town," he growled, shaking his head.

Jasper laughed. "Yeah, 'cause you didn't think to fill it up yesterday when you went into town. We did."

Emmett scoffed. "Whatever. You lost, too."

Their brother shrugged. "Yeah, but at least I got here only seconds behind Ed."

Emmett jumped at Jasper, and the two were still throwing each other around when the others pulled in.

* * *

_A/N: So...the Cullens are in Forks. Yay! It can't be long until Edward & Bella meet (or Alice & Bella, for that matter), can it?_

_I know you're going to ask... Bella couldn't find Carlisle because, like the others, he changes his name sometimes when they move, and the family is good about going on and deleting and changing his information from databases and computer systems._

_By the way, if you can't find the poll on my profile, make sure you're viewing the normal site, not the mobile version. I don't think you can see it on the mobile. :) Also, be sure you've voted in the Fanatic Fanfics Awards! I'm up for Best Beta, In Pursuit by Sarge's Girls is up for Favorite Crime Fic, & Drotuno & Beffers87 are up for a slew of great categories, so we'd all appreciate your votes!_

_Okay, leave me some love and let me know if you're excited that they're FINALLY in the same town...or curse me out that I left it THERE, with them SO CLOSE! (No, really, don't curse me out. I'd cry. LOL) I'll see you Wednesday! Mwah! – Jen_


	11. Chapter 10

_A/N: Quick thank you for all the love you guys are showing this story. I'm seriously, seriously thankful. Now, I KNOW you're all on pins and needles for this one, so I'll let you get to it. See me at the bottom!_

* * *

**Chapter Ten**

Jessica reached over to turn off the radio. "Where should we start?"

Bella was quiet in the back seat as her friends talked about which store to hit first. She, Angela, and Jessica were in Port Angeles to shop for school clothes. They were only five days from the start of their senior year, and all of them wanted new clothes—although Bella and Angela were more about comfort and function than style, like Jess.

_What a difference two years makes,_ Bella thought, remembering the summer two years before when she'd last gone back-to-school shopping with her mom. She'd had one of the worst panic attacks she'd had since right after the terrorist attacks. Getting out of New York had been the right decision. She hadn't had a panic attack since being in Washington, although she still had the occasional nightmare.

"What are you planning to look for?" Angela asked, looking in the rearview mirror at Bella, who smiled wryly.

"Jeans, some T-shirts, a few long skirts and some shirts to go with them. Couplea sweaters. Nothing too exciting."

"I need some new bras and stuff. Mike's already seen all mine." Jessica giggled, making Bella and Angela roll their eyes playfully.

"I need some, too," Bella admitted. She didn't have anyone to wear them for, but it had been a while since she bought new undergarments, so she needed them regardless.

Angela agreed, and moments later, they were pulling up in front of the first store, a little boutique named Teen Chic.

Jessica knew immediately where she was headed when they got into the store. Bella watched her pick up a black and white striped dress and hold it up, and then she turned to Angela.

"Know what you're looking at first?"

Angela nodded. "Tops, I think."

Bella turned, and the two of them moved to the other side of the store from Jess.

Twenty minutes later, the three of them headed into the dressing rooms. Bella gaped at Jessica's five dresses, four tops, three skirts, two jeans, and one T-shirt.

"Only one T-shirt, Jess?" Angela asked, echoing Bella's thoughts.

Jessica shrugged. "If I like it, I'll just pick out three or four more colors. They're the same, so I don't need to try them all on."

Bella nodded. It made sense...if Jessica didn't already have fourteen other items to try on. She held up her own two tops, two jeans, two skirts, and a T-shirt. "I'm good here."

Angela grinned, her own stack similar to Bella's. "Me, too."

Bella realized they'd each picked out a handful of new undergarments, as well—although, again, Jessica had double what she and Angela did.

After trying on everything and deciding everything she'd picked out worked well, she settled next to Angela on the little padded benches inside the main changing area to wait. She pulled out her phone and checked to see if she had any Facebook messages. Ali hadn't messaged her in a couple of days, but she'd said she would be busy with family stuff, getting ready for the new school year, so Bella wasn't worried. She did have an e-mail from her mom, so she opened it and smiled at the picture that popped up.

_Bella,_

_I wish you'd decided to go with us to the beach. Phil and I had an amazing time (see the picture someone took of me burying him in the sand up to his head!), but I missed having you with me. I know I just saw you on spring break and you worked a lot this summer, but I wish we'd been able to see each other this summer._

_I can't believe my baby's getting ready to be a senior. The years have flown by, haven't they?_

_I need to run. I signed up for a pottery class, and it starts in an hour._

_Love you!_

_Mom_

Bella swiped at her eyes so Angela wouldn't see the tears. She'd made the excuse to her mom about having to work over the summer. In reality, she simply hadn't been in the mood for the beach—or much of anything, for that matter. She'd hung out with Angela, Jessica, and the other people in their group, as well as Jake and his friends from the reservation, but she had a hard time always getting into whatever they were doing. Luckily, she'd always been pretty quiet, so no one had noticed that she wasn't participating as much anymore.

She typed out a quick reply to her mom.

_It was good to see your e-mail. Looks like you & Phil (you, at least!) had fun! How long was he cleaning sand off?_

_What did you make in pottery class? You'll have to take a picture and show me._

_I'm in Port Angeles with Jessica and Angela right now, shopping for some new clothes for school. I think Jess is trying to buy out the store. I got a lot for myself, but nothing like her!_

_I'll e-mail again when I know my class schedule._

_Love,_

_Bella_

When she looked up, Jessica and Angela were waiting. "Oh, sorry. Was e-mailing my mom back."

Jessica kept up a running commentary as the three of them went to the counter to pay and then out to the car, ending with, "I need shoes."

Angela nodded and steered the car to Heel and Toe, which was priced somewhere above Payless, but still affordable and, Bella had to admit, cute.

They spent half an hour shopping for shoes, and Bella ended up leaving with some new sneakers, a dressy casual wedge, and a cute sandal. She was set for the new school year, no matter how much Jessica whined that she hadn't bought enough.

Checking her watch, Angela said, "Time to go. I have to get back. Ben's taking me to the movies tonight."

Bella nodded. "I told my dad I'd cook tonight since he picked up food at the diner last night, and I still need to get groceries."

The trip home took about forty-five minutes, and Bella waved as Angela dropped her off and then pulled out of the driveway.

Her dad still wasn't home from work, so she ran upstairs and tossed her bags on the bed, then left him a note on the kitchen counter to tell him she was back in town and at the store in case he came home while she was gone. Then she grabbed her keys and left the house.

The grocery store was busy. Saturdays always were—at least as busy as a small town like Forks could get. Bella wound through the aisles, grabbing everything she needed to make chicken, broccoli, and rice casserole. Like Bella, Charlie had simple tastes, and while he wasn't fond of green stuff—his words, not hers—he actually liked the broccoli in that one.

Realizing she'd walked past the rice she wanted, she took a few steps back, only to run into another person—or solid wall, from the feel of it. "Oh, shoot. I'm sorry! I didn't see y..." Her voice trailed off when she turned around and saw that the woman she'd run into had also turned.

The woman was beautiful—reddish-brown hair that fell down her back in waves, a sweet smile on her face, and perfect white teeth—but Bella still felt a chill run down her spine. The woman's face was pale, and her eyes... Bella had only seen eyes that same golden honey color twice in her life: on Dr. Cullen and Edward.

"Are you all right?" the woman asked, looking at her with concern. "You didn't hurt yourself, did you?"

"I'm..." Bella shook her head. "I'm fine. I have to go."

Leaving her cart where it was, she nearly ran out of the store before panic could take over.

~oooOOOooo~

They'd been in Forks for twenty-four hours, and for the most part, they were already settled in. It didn't take long when everyone moved at vampire speeds. Carlisle was at the hospital to meet with the people in charge, Esme was at the grocery store to stock up the kitchen for appearance's sake, and the others were out exploring and hunting, so Edward was taking the time to enjoy the silence. He was at the piano, and the melody that had come to him in the wreckage of the Twin Towers as he watched over Bella was filling the room. _Bella's Lullaby,_ he called it in his head. He'd yet to play it for anyone but himself, as it was too personal to share.

Esme returned home first. Edward heard her mind before the car, and his senses went on alert at her thoughts.

_The poor girl looked shocked, like she'd seen a ghost. I've seen fear before, and caution, but never shock, like she knew me from somewhere._

An image of brown hair and deep brown eyes flashed through her mind, and before the span of a human heartbeat, Edward was out of the house and waiting in the driveway, waiting for Esme to pull up to the garage.

He barely registered her, "Edward?" as he stepped up to her when she climbed out of the car. His mind was screaming at him that it couldn't be, but the scent of her was all over Esme's back and in her hair. It burned his throat like the sweetest of fire, and he swallowed back venom.

_Bella._

"Where?" he growled softly. "Where was she? Why do you smell like her?"

"Who, Edward?" Esme's voice was gentle, and the sound calmed him a little. "Where was who?"

He fisted his hands in his hair and tugged. "Bella. Y-You smell like Bella, and you... You saw her."

"Oh!" Esme gasped, her hand moving to cover her mouth as her mind exploded.

Edward saw it all: someone bumping into Esme's back in the grocery store; a tired voice apologizing; a beautiful young woman, her mouth open in surprise; the groceries left behind as the young woman walked, fast, out of the store.

"Edward..."

It took a moment for Edward to realize that Alice was speaking to him. He'd been so wrapped in Bella's scent and Esme's memory of her that he hadn't heard her arrival back at the house. Slowly, he turned his attention to his sister, who was blocking her thoughts so well that he couldn't get anything aside from the catalog of celebrities who'd been on the cover of her favorite fashion magazines...since the seventies.

"What. Did. You. Do?" he hissed, taking a step toward her.

Jasper was suddenly between them, glaring at Edward. "Back off, Ed. I don't want to have to protect Alice from you, but I will..."

Emmett took hold of his arm, but Edward shook him off. "I'm not gonna hurt her, dammit," he growled. Looking over at Alice, he asked again, "What did you do, Alice?"

"I... I didn't want you to find out this way," she said, her voice pained.

Before he could beg her to tell him what she knew, she opened her thoughts, and the fight went out of Edward as he watched months of memories fly by.

"You knew," he breathed out, feeling his anger return. "You _knew_ she'd moved here. You sought her out and brought her into this life. What gave you that right, Alice? She's innocent. Human. She doesn't deserve—"

"She's your mate!" Alice cried, struggling against Jasper's hold.

"Yes, _my_ mate," Edward seethed. "Not yours. It wasn't your decision to make."

Her mind was still a whirlwind of thoughts of the conversations she'd had with Bella. "You were fading away, Edward, right before our eyes. I had to do something. She knew you and Carlisle were different. She figured out what you were before I contacted her. I saw that she started searching for you both."

"How could you move us here, especially without discussing it with me first? We could've gone anywhere else. I understood that we had to move, but here? Why would you..." Edward's voice trailed off as he caught a flash of something in her mind before she hid her thoughts again. The guilt that crossed her features made him freeze. "Oh, Alice," he sighed. "Tell me you didn't make up the vision about the girl in Portland."

Alice started to shake her head, but then she tore herself out of Jasper's grip and marched over to him. Emmett tightened his hold on Edward, but Alice said, "Let him go. He's not going to hurt me."

Edward ripped his arm from Emmett's hand and stepped up to Alice, his hands curled into fists at his sides to keep from grabbing his sister and shaking her. "Tell me, dammit. Tell me you didn't..."

She shook her head, her eyes filled with pain. "I had to," she whispered. "She was...falling apart, Edward. I had a vision—a real one." She opened her mind again, and the vision nearly brought him to his knees.

_Bella looked...different than the image from Esme's memory. She was too thin—like she'd missed more than an occasional meal—with dark circles under her eyes. He watched as Bella answered the phone, shaking her head before she told the person on the other end that she didn't feel like going out, that she was going to bed early._

"What the hell happened?" he growled.

"That," Alice answered, pointing to where he was rubbing the ache that had taken up residence in his chest. "She was losing hope, Edward. I've been hearing it in our conversations for the last few months, after she couldn't find any information on Carlisle after he left the hospital in Rochester. If she continued going the way she was, she would've faded away. She was lost, hiding from the world, from happiness...from living."

"She would've been okay," he tried to argue, but the image in Alice's head mocked him. His Little Bird looked wrecked.

Alice nodded slowly. "You see it, don't you? She looked just like you did before—"

"Before my talk with Esme," he whispered, closing his eyes against the pain in his chest.

Alice's voice was just as soft. "Yes. Would you rather have that kind of life for Bella—one of pain and emptiness—than one of happiness, of fulfillment...of love?"

"Our lives," he started to argue, but Esme stepped up and put her hand on his arm, and he let his voice trail off as he looked up to her.

"Fate, Edward," she murmured, reminding him in her head of their conversation.

With a groan, Edward scrubbed at his eyes with the heels of his hands. "I have to go," he sighed.

He turned and ran before anyone could stop him.

~oOo~

Edward ran through the forest, taking down a large bear and two deer in the process, until he reached the edge of town. He slowed to a stop just inside the tree line. He hadn't realized he'd been heading into town until the first thought from a passing motorist reached his mind.

Bella. He'd been heading to Bella, even though he didn't know where to find her.

He turned, but before he take off running again, his phone beeped. He curled his hands into fists for a moment and then reached in and pulled the phone out to check his messages.

_It'll be fine, Edward. Trust yourself._

Below it, Alice had included an address and directions.

Without conscious thought, he began running, keeping to the trees until he finally found the right house. Even if he hadn't had the address, he'd have known it was the correct one. The yard, the old red truck in the driveway...both were saturated in Bella's unique scent. It had been three years, minus the small taste he'd gotten from Esme, but the combination of strawberries and freesia hit him in the gut like a wrecking ball. He dug his fingers into the nearest tree, leaving impressions from each of his fingers before he relaxed and loosened his grip.

It was dark out, so he dashed from the tree line to the back of the house, out of view of any neighbors. Following her scent, Edward tracked Bella to the second story, a window at the side of the house. A large tree was growing right next to the house, and it was that tree that Edward climbed up into, perching within the leaves to peer inside the house.

Bella's bedroom.

It was empty, but just as he settled in to wait, the bedroom door opened and Bella stepped in. Edward groaned and nearly launched himself through the window as her scent got stronger. She was wrapped in a towel, her skin rosy and damp from the shower she'd apparently been in moments before. It took everything he had for Edward to remain where he was.

As if she'd heard the sound he'd made, Bella froze and looked out the window, as if she could see him. Edward moved back farther into the branches, even though he knew she couldn't see him, and watched as she shook her head and moved over to the dresser beside the door.

Bella was stunning. She'd grown...everywhere. Three years before, she'd still had a boyish figure with hints of a young woman in certain places. She'd matured since then, and her figure showed it, even through the towel. And when she dropped the towel to pull on the cotton underwear she'd grabbed from the dresser, Edward couldn't help but groan again.

She had curves where women were supposed to have curves. Her breasts were full, but not too big—just right for his hands. Her hips were rounded, her waist slender, giving her an hourglass figure.

Edward was moving before he'd noticed and stopped himself just before he got close enough to reach out and touch the window. He'd never felt the kind of emotion in himself before. There was lust, sure—she'd turned into a beautiful woman, and seeing her in Esme's memory had done nothing for the real thing—but more than that, the protectiveness he'd felt that day three years before was still there, and the love that he'd tried to deny he'd felt...the devotion and tenderness... Everything became so much more clear.

He could no more leave her now than he could cut off his own hand. He was hers, without reservation. If she turned him away, he would go, but he would always watch over her. If she didn't...if he was lucky enough to be accepted...he would be hers until the end of days.

When Bella pulled an old, well-worn Forks PD shirt over her head and then hurried over to the window, Edward shrank back in the branches of the large tree. He worried that she'd seen him as she held her breath. Not being able to hear her mind was as torturous now as it had been when he first met her.

Bella looked into the tree and then down below and around, and when she shook her head and stepped back, Edward frowned. She looked...disappointed. When she spoke, he jolted.

"Did you really expect Edward to be out in the tree, Bella?"

She sounded almost...mocking, but her voice had his fingers curling into the trunk of the tree, and hearing his name was like the sweetest of angels. But her next words nearly shattered him.

"Grow up, dammit. He's just on your mind because of that woman at the grocery store. You're never going to see him again, and the sooner you get over that, the better."

When she sank to the bed and began to cry, it took everything Edward had to jump to the ground instead of climb through the window.

As soon as he hit the edge of the forest, he pulled out his phone and turned back to watch Bella's window as he hit speed dial three. When the voice on the other end answered, he sighed and said, "Okay, Alice. I'm in. I'll... I'll be back in the morning, and we can talk then."

* * *

_A/N: *hides* Please don't hate me for the cliffie! You'll see more on Wednesday! :)_

_Leave me some love and let me know what you think about Bella running into Esme (literally!) and Edward learning about Alice's trickery and his seeing Bella for the first time since that day in New York._

_I'll see you Wednesday! Mwah! – Jen_


	12. Chapter 11

_A/N: Thank you, thank you, thank you. I love you guys. Seriously. One note about the last chapter. I know a few of you were upset that Edward just sat there and watched Bella undress. Let me say a couple of things that might explain where I felt like his head was at:_

_First, Edward didn't realize it would happen or he'd have left sooner. When it did happen, a) he's a 100yo vampire trapped in a 17yo boy's body, so he has the same hormonal urges that all 17yo boys have; and b) she's his mate, and he was in shock from finding her and seeing her for the first time in four years. It completely took him by surprise, so he didn't react quickly enough, and by the time he was reacting, it was all he could do to hide so he didn't scare her by appearing out of nowhere. Back to the mate thing:_

_"Edward was moving before he'd noticed and stopped himself just before he got close enough to reach out and touch the window. He'd never felt the kind of emotion in himself before. There was lust, sure—she'd turned into a beautiful woman, and seeing her in Esme's memory had done nothing for the real thing—but more than that, the protectiveness he'd felt that day three years before was still there, and the love that he'd tried to deny he'd felt...the devotion and tenderness... Everything became so much more clear._

_He could no more leave her now than he could cut off his own hand. He was hers, without reservation. If she turned him away, he would go, but he would always watch over her. If she didn't...if he was lucky enough to be accepted...he would be hers until the end of days."_

_So there was lust, yes, like a normal 17yo boy. But a lot of it was simply the mating bond kind of...cementing itself within him. I hope that helps explain my reasoning._

_Now, forgive the long author's note. This is a VERY important chapter, so read on! :)_

* * *

**Chapter Eleven**

Bella woke up with the sun after crying herself to sleep the night before. She'd spent an hour after her shower wishing whatever noise she'd heard outside her window had been Edward, while at the same time berating herself for being stupid. Edward, if he really did exist and it wasn't a huge set of coincidences, was out of her life, just as he had been for the last three years. No amount of wishing was going to make it true. After running into the woman in the grocery store, she'd messaged Ali on Facebook a handful of times, but a look at her laptop revealed them glaring at her with no reply.

_OMG. Let me know when you get back! The strangest thing happened! I don't know what to do!_

_Ali, please! I need to talk to you! You're the only one I can talk to._

_Where are you? I think I'm going crazy. :(_

Just as she was about to close the computer, a new message from Ali popped up.

_Calm down! What happened? Bella, are you okay?_

Bella sighed and pulled the laptop closer, telling Ali all about the woman in the store...finishing with her eyes.

_Wow, Bella! No wonder you were freaking out. :( The reason I didn't answer back earlier is...I'm coming to Forks! I'm already on my way. I wanted to meet you before school started. Is that okay?_

Bella grinned. _Yeah, sure! I'm off work, so I'll be here all day. My dad's working, though, so maybe I'll have to take you by the station._

She gave Ali her address and easy directions to the house and then said goodbye so she could shower, get dressed, and clean up a bit before her friend arrived.

~oOo~

Bella was working on a Sudoku puzzle a couple of hours later when there was a knock on the door. After tossing it onto the table, she stood, straightened her T-shirt, and made her way over to answer it. She took a deep breath before pulling the door open, and she started to say hi, but before she could get more than the first sound out, a few things registered.

_Pale skin._

_Beautiful._

_Golden eyes._

She swallowed as the words she'd planned to say died in her throat. Instead, she took another deep breath, trying to keep herself calm, and asked, "Do I need to invite you in?"

Al—whatever her real name was looked down for a moment and then shook her head and stepped over the threshold.

Bella shut the door behind her and quickly moved to the other side of the couch, putting as much distance between them as she could. She was shaking, so she reached out to steady herself on the back of the sofa and glared over at the raven-haired girl. "Wh-Who are you?"

The girl took a step toward her, and Bella quickly shook her head. With a frown, the girl nodded.

"My name is Alice...Alice Cullen. For all intents and purposes, I'm Dr. Carlisle Cullen's daughter...and Edward's sister."

Bella had expected something like that, but it still hit her square in the chest, and she gasped, stumbling back as she shook her head.

The girl—Alice—was beside her before she could blink. Bella shrank back.

"I know it's a shock," Alice said softly as she took a step back. "I didn't want you to fall and hurt yourself."

"I...I don't understand," Bella stammered. "Was this... Was it all a big game to you?" Her anger rushed back as her shock ebbed. "Did you enjoy hearing how crazy I felt? I _talked_ to you! I told you things I've never told another soul. You... You've been lying to me for _months!_ Did you and Dr. _Cullen_ and Edward _Masen_ sit around and laugh? 'Oh, let's toy with the human and her emotions. That'll be fun!'"

Alice tried to interrupt, but Bella wasn't interested in excuses as she continued to rail against the person she'd _thought_ was her friend.

"Did you know that I've cried myself to sleep more times over the last three years than not—and even more in the last eight months than in the previous two years combined? Of course you did! I told you!" She laughed wryly. "Or did you see that? I mean, I'm assuming you didn't lie about being able to see the future. If you did, you're a better actress than even I'm giving you credit for."

"I-I knew," Alice whispered, looking down at the floor. "I tried to help as much as I could. I hated seeing that and hearing you tell me about it."

Bella snorted. "You knew how hard I was looking for Dr. Cullen and how much I wanted to find... _Fuck!_ You knew where they were all along! You knew and you did nothing but screw with me." She gripped the couch like a lifeline, swallowing back bile that threatened to rise. "You listened to me go on and on about Edward...about how I felt, what I wished for... I'm sure he had a good laugh about that—you all did. The poor little human girl falling for the gorgeous, perfect, mysterious vampire."

"No!" Alice shook her head. "Carlisle and Edward didn't kn—"

"Get out," Bella seethed, unable to listen to any excuses. She was so mad, so hurt, that nothing Alice could've said would make her listen. "I never want to see or talk to you again. I won't be entertainment. I owe Edward and Dr. Cullen for saving my life, but I can't..." She shook her head. "Just get out."

"Bel—"

"Get out!"

Bella picked up the closest thing from the table beside the couch—an old hard cover book of Charlie's—and threw it at Alice, who dodged it without blinking an eye. Bella jumped when it hit the wall with a bang before falling to the floor.

Alice gave her one last look and then let herself out as Bella stumbled to the couch and sat, finally giving in to her tears.

~oOo~

When Bella could breathe again without feeling like she had to throw up, she got to her feet and made her way upstairs. She felt...dead inside, like every tear she'd cried had take a bit of her emotion away with it, until there was nothing left. Her heart was heavy, her stomach a roiling mess, as she pushed the bedroom door closed behind her.

Seeing her laptop open on the desk brought back some of the anger, and she knew what she needed to do. She pulled up Facebook and went to her Friends list. Finding "Ali" on the short list was easy, and she only hesitated a moment before clicking _Unfriend_. As soon as that was done, Bella's tears started again, and her anger surged. She opened the desk drawer and pulled out the notebook from underneath everything else. When she opened it, Edward's face—the first one she'd drawn after the attack—stared back at her. In a fit of rage, she tore it from the notebook, crumpled it into a ball, and threw it across the room. It felt so good that she did it again with the next.

_His perfect smile._

_His sharp, sexy jaw._

_His perfectly imperfect nose._

_His crazy hair that looked like he'd just rolled out of bed._

_The golden eyes that had reminded her of warm honey, but now only looked back at her mockingly._

Picture after picture, she tore from the notebook, crumpled, and threw away, until there was nothing left but blank pages.

"Shit!" she growled. "Shit, shit, shit!"

She glanced around the room, and her gaze came to rest on the framed picture on her nightstand. Her heart aching, Bella moved over to the bed and grabbed it, taking it back to the desk with her. She was openly sobbing as she stared down at the little bird enfolded in the angel's wings. How wrong she'd been, thinking he was her angel. He'd saved her life, only to rip her to shreds emotionally. She wasn't sure which would've been worse: what he, Alice, and Dr. Cullen had done, or leaving her to die alone in the wreckage.

Bella set the picture on the desk and reached for the stapler, which was heavy and sturdy and perfectly suited for what she wanted to do to the image that was nothing but a lie. She raised it over her head and was just about to slam it down onto the picture when a pained voice caused her to freeze.

"Don't, Bella. Please."

~oooOOOooo~

Edward watched as his voice and words registered to her. She stopped moving, the stapler frozen over her head, as her heart began to race so quickly that he was honestly afraid it would beat right out of her chest. If his had still been beating, it would've been thudding just as heavily.

"_No, no, no. He can't be here in my room,"_ Bella muttered without looking up.

At first, he thought she was talking to him, but then he realized she was speaking aloud, probably without conscious thought. When she lowered the stapler, he felt his shoulders relax, but he held his breath when she turned.

"_Fuck,"_ she breathed. A beautiful blush rose on her cheeks and spread down her neck and onto the top of her chest, which was rising and falling rapidly. Moisture gathered in her eyes, but she didn't move to wipe it away.

He started to say something, but she began mumbling again as she clutched the stapler to her chest.

"_How can he be even sexier than I remember? So much better than my drawings."_

Edward couldn't help but look over at the pile of crumpled pages against the far wall. His movement jolted her out of the fog she seemed to be under, and he watched as what seemed like a thousand different emotions flashed across her face.

Hurt, anger, attraction, fear... Each of them pierced his heart and felt like a kick to the stomach.

"Bella—"

"Wh-What are you doing here?" she asked, fumbling to put the stapler on her desk. Her voice was sarcastic and angry as she continued. "Didn't Alice do all the talking for you? Aren't I already embarrassed enough?" She reached up and swiped at the tears that had begun to fall. "Shit." Turning angry eyes on him, she seemed to steel her resolve as she asked once more, "What are you doing here, Edward? Is it Masen...or Cullen? Did you just have to come show me that my memory didn't do you justice? I'm sure _Ali_ showed you the photo of the drawing that I sent her over Facebook. Or did you come here to silence me because I figured out your secret?"

She threw up her hands, making her T-shirt catch on her breasts, and Edward couldn't help but watch as it molded itself to her curves. Her voice brought his gaze back to her face.

"Surprise—or not... I've known for months—almost a year—and the only person I've ever told was your sister. Your secret's safe with me. I'm not going to go spreading it everywhere." The next part was muttered as she looked down at her feet, but Edward heard it clear as day anyway. "Not like anyone would believe me. No one ever believed me."

Edward wanted nothing more than to kiss her in that moment, if for no other reason than to get her to be quiet so he could explain. But he knew even without Alice's future-sight that it was way too soon for that. Instead, he sat down in the chair in the corner of her room and waited her out.

Bella continued to mutter to herself as she paced back and forth in front of her desk. Finally, she sank to the desk chair, leaned forward with her elbows on her knees, and sighed, looking anywhere but at him.

Deciding now was his chance, Edward was quiet as he spoke. "First of all, I'm sorry for Alice. She contacted you...befriended you...without telling any of us—even Jasper, her husband."

"H-Husband?" Bella shook her head slowly. "You said he was your...foster brother." Her heart thudded heavily. "Was anything you told me true?"

Edward frowned. "Little Bird—"

"Don't call me that," Bella interrupted hotly. "You haven't earned the right. Not anymore."

Nodding slowly, Edward started again. "Bella, you have to understand... What I am...what my family is... It's something that _no one_ can know." Before Bella could protest again, he shook his head. "No, I don't mean you. I trust you. Alice did, as well, or she wouldn't have told you about her talent." He watched as Bella mulled that over, and not for the first time—or even the tenth—did he wish he could read her mind. When she nodded, he continued. "When I found you..."

Edward groaned and stood, moving to the window. He felt short of breath—an odd feeling, given that he didn't need to breathe—like he always did when he thought of how close he'd come to losing Bella underneath the wreckage.

"When I found you," he began again, still facing the window, "you were only just turning fifteen. You were...dying. I couldn't tell you the truth then."

"And after? Why'd you leave?" There was still anger in her tone, but her heart wasn't beating as hard and the way she spoke, much softer now, told him she was listening. "You could've told me after I got out of the hospital."

He shook his head as he turned to face her. "My life... It's not a safe world I live in, Bella. You haven't asked me the most obvious question. Aren't you curious?"

Shock jolted through him at her answer.

"No. I know you don't drink from humans." When he raised an eyebrow, she smirked. "My friend, Jacob, told me about the legends from his tribe, about how the 'civilized' vampires drank from animals instead. Your eyes..."

Edward nodded slowly. "Jacob?"

"Jacob Black. He's a member of the Quileute tribe from—"

"La Push," Edward finished. "Yes, I remember. I was here with Carlisle when we made the treaty with Jacob's...great-grandfather, I believe."

Bella nodded. "That's how I figured out..." She waved her hand at him and then put it back on her lap, twisting her fingers together. "I... I wanted to find you," she admitted quietly, looking away from him again. "I don't understand why, but I've never..." She swallowed nervously, and Edward listened to her heart skip a beat before she spoke again. "I haven't been able to stop thinking of you. A part of me felt...missing"—she put her hand over her heart—"here."

Edward closed his eyes at her admission. He'd hoped that she felt the same, but he hadn't expected...no matter what Alice had told him. Without thinking of what he was doing, he reached up to rub his chest in the same place she had, feeling the scar of his tattoo under his shirt. "I know," he finally whispered. "I felt it, too."

He was amazed when Bella stood and made her way to the bed. He didn't sense any fear as she patted the blanket beside her.

"Would you...sit with me?" she asked tentatively.

He was up and on the spot she'd indicated before she could blink, and when she whipped her head around to face him, there was surprise in her eyes and she laughed nervously.

"I thought I'd imagined it earlier when Alice moved that quick."

Edward smiled and shook his head. "It's a...perk, I suppose."

"What else?" she asked quickly. "I want to know everything." Then she frowned. "I mean, if...if you trust me to keep it to myself."

He slowly reached out and laid his hand over hers, worried that she'd pull away from his cold touch. Relief had him nearly shaking as, instead, she turned her hand over and laced her fingers through his.

"I didn't imagine the cold," she breathed, and he started to take his hand away, but she held tight. "I didn't notice it with you...before. But I remember Dr. Cullen in the hospital, when I was recovering... His hands were always colder than normal."

"It doesn't...bother you?" Edward asked slowly.

Bella shook her head. "Will you tell me more?"

Edward began to speak, swearing to himself that he would tell her everything she wanted to know. He told her about their strength—reminding her of how he'd moved the steel beam and concrete from her that day—and about his own talent.

"Wait," she interrupted. "So you can read _everyone else's_ minds, but not _mine_?" When he shook his head, she laughed. "I hate to say it, but I'm kinda glad. Sometimes even I don't understand what's going on up there. I'd hate to subject you to that."

He shook his head and smiled softly. "I'm not. You have no idea how much I want to hear everything about you, Bella."

Bella smiled and looked down at their joined hands. "What about the others in your...family?" She phrased it like a question, and he nodded. "Do they have talents like yours and Alice's?"

Edward explained about Jasper's ability to sense and manipulate emotions. "Other than the three of us, there are no other real 'talents.' Emmett is stronger than any other vampire I've ever met, and Carlisle... He has the ability to work in a hospital, so he has an amazing ability to ignore the burn from the smell of blood," he finished.

"Burn?"

Reaching up with his free hand, Edward touched his throat. "Blood, human more so than animal, smells...good," he explained with a grimace. He was waiting for that moment that Bella learned something about him that made her run. "It makes us feel as our throats are on fire."

Bella tensed. "Am I hurting you right now? I mean, being this close to you?"

Edward swallowed. The burn was there, but muted. "No, Lit—Bella," he said firmly. "It's...less with you."

"Why?" She shook her head and smiled wryly. "Not that I'm not glad, but..."

He knew why. She was his mate. Rose had noticed the same thing when she found Emmett, and even Carlisle had noticed with Esme. But Bella wasn't ready for that discussion yet—and frankly, neither was he. Instead, he shook his head. If she accepted him when it was all said and done, then he would tell her.

She nodded, looking down at their hands. He'd been rubbing hers gently back and forth with his thumb as they talked, and she watched the movement for a minute before speaking again.

"Tell me about your family? Are you all really related?"

Edward smiled. "No, not by blood, but we are a family regardless."

Knowing he'd have gotten permission from them all, he began with Carlisle, telling Bella how everyone had come together as a family. After Carlisle, he explained his own story.

"So you really are seventeen? You didn't lie about that?"

Shaking his head, Edward said, "No, I'm really seventeen. I've just been seventeen for a very long time."

When she smiled, he continued. He glossed over some of the details of Alice's and Rose's stories, but when he told her Esme's, Bella's eyes filled with tears.

"That's so sad," she said with a sniffle. "She's lucky Carlisle found her."

Edward reached up and gently wiped away a tear that had fallen. The feel of her soft skin under his fingers made him ache to touch her more.

Bella started to speak and then stopped, repeating that a few times as he waited. She seemed to be wrestling with what to say, so he wanted to give her time.

"Are you... Where do you live?"

"We just moved back to Forks," he admitted. "That's another secret Alice was keeping from everyone. None of us knew you were here, Bella. If I'd known..." He shook his head.

Her hand tensed in his. "If you'd known...what? You wouldn't have come?"

Edward nodded his head slowly. "You have to understand, Little Bird..." He froze, waiting for her to call him out on the name. When she didn't, he continued. "For three years, I forced myself to stay away from you, no matter how much it hurt. You're...safer if you aren't in the middle of my world."

"But now?" Her voice was small, unsure.

He squeezed her hand gently and reached over with a finger under her chin to force her to look at him. When she did, he shook his head.

"Now, if you want me to leave, you'll have to tell me to go. Otherwise, I'm not going anywhere."

* * *

_A/N: Did you REALLY think I would make Edward wait to surprise Bella at school, in front of other people? *shakes head* You guys crack me up. No way would I want their reunion to be public! Hehe_

_I know that was another...sort-of cliffie. On a good note, you MAY get another post on Sunday. We'll see. I've been busy lately so haven't been writing as much, so I'd like to get another chapter finished in order to stay ahead, so if I can finish the one I'm working on, I'll post then. If not, I'll post next Wednesday. But rest assured, neither of them are going anywhere! ;)_

_Now leave me some love and let me know what you thought of the chapter! Did the Bella/Alice confrontation happen like you thought? What about Edward's reveal? I can't wait to hear what you think!_

_See you guys in a few days to a week! Mwah! – Jen_


	13. Chapter 12

_A/N: I didn't get written what I wanted to, but you guys have been so great that I wanted to give you part two of E/B's reunion now. :) It's a thank you from the bottom of my heart for all the love you've given me. So enjoy!_

* * *

**Chapter Twelve**

The thought of Edward leaving made Bella nearly break out into a cold sweat. She squeezed his hand—amazed at how...solid he felt, like marble covered with smooth, cool skin—and shook her head quickly. She didn't know why it scared her, but it did. The ache she'd felt for the last three years had disappeared the moment she'd heard his voice, and to have it flare for a moment when he said he'd leave if she wanted him to was frightening. She didn't know how, but she knew that he was important and she needed him in her life.

She had so many questions, but she didn't know where to start. Opening her mouth, she started to ask what his plans were now, but she closed it with a snap, not sure if that would seem pushy or not.

"Just ask, Little Bird," Edward said with an indulgent smile. "My life is an open book for you, so anything you want to know, you just have to ask."

After hesitating for only a moment, Bella decided to just go for it. "What are your plans—your family's plans—while you're in Forks? There's...not a lot to do since it's such a small town...as you're aware, I'm sure." She knew she was babbling, but found herself unable to stop. "I imagine you travel a lot. Do you plan to leave soon? Where will you go? How long—?"

"Bella, breathe," he instructed, chuckling when Bella gulped in a nervous breath. "Yes we do a fair amount of traveling, but part of what sets my family apart from...others of my kind is that we like to settle down, live as human an existence as we can."

"How?" she couldn't help but ask.

"As you know, Carlisle is a doctor. He doesn't have to work—between Alice's talent and mine, as well as our long lives, we've amassed enough money to live more than comfortably—but he chooses to. He's said it's because it gives him a purpose and direction and helps to keep him grounded and living as the man he was."

Bella smiled softly, remembering the kind-hearted doctor from New York. "He's good at what he does," she murmured. "How does he do it? I mean, I assume he was using a different name when I couldn't find him..."

Edward nodded. "He truly loves it. And yes, he was using another alias after we left Rochester. We have a contact that helps create them, although all of us are now adept at it all on our own, as well. Carlisle uses false papers when he changes identities, although he has gone back to school several times to keep up-to-date with advances in medicine."

Bella's mind was whirling with the information, but she pressed on. "And the rest of you? What will you do while he's working?"

"We'll attend school," Edward said with a grin as Bella felt her eyes widen.

"Yeah?"

He nodded. "Again, it's something we do to blend in and to be able to stay somewhere for several years. We've done the homeschooled bit a few times, as well—where Carlisle tells people at work that Esme teaches us—but surprisingly, people tend to speculate less when we're seen daily at school instead of holed away at home all the time."

"How many times have you been to high school?"

"We're nearing twenty-five." He smiled when she blanched. "Plus college four times."

"Wow..." Bella shook her head. Edward's thumb, brushing back and forth softly across her skin distracted her for a moment, but then she hummed in thought. "Hey, I wonder if we'll have any classes together. It's not that big of a school..."

Edward laughed. "I'm sure we will. I'd almost bet that Alice has somehow made that happen. If not, I can speak to the person in the office. I'm sure I could charm my way into rearranging my schedule." His grin faded and he looked unsure, which didn't sit well in Bella's stomach. "If that's something you want, I mean."

"Yes," she interjected quickly, feeling her cheeks heat. Deciding a change of subject was in order, she asked, "How does school work? What do you tell people about how you're related?"

"Normally, Alice, Jasper, and I would go in as sophomores, while Rose and Emmett would be juniors, since that would leave us three years before we graduated. Rose and Em either use the year to travel or work on a car at home, using the story that they're waiting for us to graduate before going off to college." He paused while Bella shifted, turning to face him more fully, not letting go of his hand. Once she was settled, he continued. "This time, since you're a senior, we decided that, if you were okay with us staying, Esme would enroll us all as seniors."

"But what about next year?" Bella asked, her brow furrowing.

Edward shrugged. "We'll move. I told you, Little Bird... I'm not going anywhere. I...can't be apart from you anymore."

Again, he rubbed his chest with his free hand, and Bella nodded, understanding the feeling.

"Okay." She smiled. "So what will you tell the school about how you're related?"

"Alice and I will be Esme's twin niece and nephew. Rose and Jasper will be twins, as well, except they'll be Carlisle's niece and nephew, since they're both blond like he is. Emmett will be their foster son."

Her mind spinning, Bella asked, "Is it complicated, having to come up with a story like that every time you move?"

Smiling, Edward said, "It can be, sure. But perfect memory is another perk of being a vampire, and we've done it enough that it's second nature now."

Bella fell silent, trying to figure out what else she wanted to ask Edward. Finally, she settled on, "Where did you all go after Rochester? I tried to find Dr. Cullen—" at his look, she corrected herself "—Carlisle, but they didn't know where he'd gone, and a friend at the police station couldn't find him."

Edward smiled sadly. "Yes, I saw from Alice's thoughts. He changed his name in case someone from the government went looking to talk to the doctors who'd treated vi...people after the attacks."

Bella knew he's started to say victims and changed his mind. In her experience, a lot of people worried about calling her and the others victims to her face. She'd felt like a victim for a long time, but having it pointed out was uncomfortable, so she appreciated it. She nodded for him to go on.

"After you got out of surgery and Carlisle assured me that you were going to be okay, I went to Alaska." At her raised eyebrow, he smiled. "There's another family there...like us."

"Animal eaters?"

He nodded. "We like to call ourselves vegetarian vampires," he said, and from the tease in his voice, she couldn't tell if he were serious or not, but she giggled, motioning for him to continue. "There's Eleazar, sort of the...head of the family, I suppose, and his...his wife, Carmen. Then there's the sisters, Kate, Tanya, and Irina, as well as Kate's...significant other, Garrett."

Bella wondered for a moment if Tanya and Irina had husbands or significant others, and if not, if Edward had ever... _Cut it out, Bella. Not the time, and it's not really your place,_ she reminded herself, tuning back in to Edward's story.

"I stayed there for a few months. That's where I got this." He reached up and touched his chest. "Garrett did it for me. Anyway, a month later, the rest of the family moved up to Alaska from Rochester. I helped them build a house up there and then moved in with them again, but in August, I...had to leave. There were too many couples, and it was all too much to hear both in my head and not."

Bella frowned, squeezing his hand. "I can't even imagine," she finally said, although she bet it was similar to how she'd felt once she was back at school—out of place and uncomfortable.

"I traveled for a year—London, a small island off the coast of Brazil that Carlisle bought years ago for Esme, and then I came home...to Portland."

Startled, Bella frowned. "That's... You were that close for that long?"

"I had no idea you were in Forks already. If I'd know..." He shook his head. "I'm not sure I'd have been able to stay away. It was hard enough when you were across the country, but only four hours away..."

They were quiet for several minutes, and then Bella asked him something she'd asked herself many times over the last three years.

"Why did you draw the bird wrapped in angel's wings?"

Edward seemed to be considering his answer for a few long moments. He stared down at their joined hands, and Bella looked down, too, to watch the movement of his thumb over hers. When he spoke, his voice was quiet.

"I was...determined to leave so you would have a normal human life, Bella. My world is dangerous, so no matter how much I wanted to stay, to watch you mature and grow into the young woman you've become, I knew that leaving was the only way to ensure that you stayed out of danger from others of my kind. I was also sure that given time, you would forget about me, forget about the hours we spent together. It was what I wanted...yet, it also wasn't.

"Part of me wanted to give you a tangible reminder of me...of our time together—something good among the tragedy of that day. A swallow represents protection, warmth...home, as well as a hardship survived. All of those things reminded me of you, of what you went through and what I wanted for you. And swallows..." Edward shook his head, his voice trailing off. "I...I kept that reminder with me, as well."

Bella gasped when he let go of her hand, only to reach down and tug at the bottom hem of his T-shirt, pulling it up so his chest over his heart came into view.

"Oh, Edward," she breathed. "It's beautiful."

~oooOOOooo~

Edward breathed deeply as he pulled up his shirt after showing what he had yet to share with anyone—including his family—except Alice, who'd seen the tattoo in her vision, and Garrett, who'd done the actual work.

"I chose this to show you, my Little Bird, flying free, living life. It was all I wanted," he admitted. He didn't voice the other reason he'd chosen that bird to draw for her and then mark himself permanently: the swallow mated for life, much like he was hers—his mate—for the rest of eternity.

He could smell Bella's tears as she reached out tentatively. When she hesitated, he brought his hand up and gently guided it to his chest. Both of them breathed sharply when her finger began tracing the tattoo. Edward felt her touch all the way to his core, warming him from the inside out. Everywhere she touched came alive. He grew hard behind his zipper as her slender fingers delicately followed the lines of the bird soaring free above his heart. He cursed his erection. Now wasn't the time, and he didn't want to scare her away with his feelings and the desire that had made him hard.

"How?" she murmured, her eyes still glued to the tattoo. "It looks like...burns?" She said it like a question, and when she looked up into eyes, she must have seen the answer.

"Oh, Edward..." The tears that had gathered finally spilled over and ran down her cheeks. "Why? That had to have hurt..."

"Worth every pain," Edward told her honestly. He explained a little about the laser and venom mixed with ink. "Our skin is too hard for any kind of needle. This was the only way."

When her voice broke on a sob, he reached out brushed her tears away, and she turned her face into his hand so he was cradling her cheek. They sat that way for several minutes, not saying a word as her gaze flickered between his face and the tattoo. As the sun came out from behind the clouds, sunlight came through the window and fell over her bed, and Bella gasped as her room was suddenly flooded with the reflection from Edward's skin.

Edward tore his hand away, ready to leave if it was too much for her. Bella reached out and pulled it back, holding his hand in one of hers and reaching out to touch the skin of his arm under the sunlight.

"So pretty," she said so quietly, he wasn't sure it was actually meant for him.

He scoffed. He wanted to say that it wasn't pretty, that it was just another sign of how unnatural he was. Instead, he teased, "Pretty? I'm a guy, Bella. I'm not _pretty._"

Bella smiled and reached out to cup his face with one hand, her thumb stroking softly across his cheek. "You're very pretty," she said firmly. "When I was trapped down there..." She shuddered, and he squeezed the hand that was still holding his. "What I remember most from that day is your voice, keeping me calm and talking to me. But I also remember how pretty—" she smirked when he scoffed again "I thought you were. It showed in every drawing I did of you." She gestured to the other side of the bed, and he glanced away long enough to see the pile of crumpled papers that she'd thrown away before he'd come into her room. "Your eyes... They're so different, but in a good way. They're beautiful and warm, and they tell so much. Your lips..."

She traced his lips with her thumb, and he stopped breathing, shocked by how much he wanted to take her thumb into his mouth and taste her skin—not her blood... The burn was there, but the desire for her blood had all but disappeared.

"Your lips are so full, and I..." She shook her head, moving her hand back to cup his face. "Your jaw... It's so strong. It defines your face and gives you a masculine beauty unlike anyone I've ever met."

Edward took a deep breath in and realized her scent had grown stronger—her arousal permeated the air so strongly that he wanted to revel in it. She was leaning in, holding her breath, and suddenly, it became too much.

"Breathe, Bella," he murmured, leaning back slightly. As much as he wanted to kiss her, he knew it still wasn't the right time.

Bella gasped and jolted, as if coming back to awareness. Her cheeks pinked as a flush worked its way over her, and he couldn't help but breathe deeply again.

"Sorry," she muttered, trying to pull her hand from his.

He smiled, shaking his head. "I was...right there with you, Little Bird. Please, don't apologize."

She started to speak, but a deep, rumbling growl interrupted her, and her blush deepened.

Edward couldn't help but chuckle. "Did you have lunch?"

Grimacing, Bella looked down at their hands, which were still joined. "No... I was waiting for Ali—erm, Alice, I guess—thinking we'd eat together." She laughed dryly, but her anger and hurt were clear.

"C'mon," he said, standing and pulling her gently to her feet. "Is it okay if I keep you company while you eat? I could leave and come back later if you need some time..." He didn't want to presume.

"No," Bella said immediately. "You can come down."

Smiling, Edward followed as she led him from the room.

~oOo~

Edward watched Bella fix a sandwich, adding a foul-smelling mayonnaise to both sides of the bread. He grimaced, which Bella caught out of the corner of her eye.

"You don't like the smell?" She waved the plate of mayo-slathered bread under his nose, grinning.

"No." Edward glared at the offending food, making her giggle. He couldn't help but chuckle as she pulled it back and began piling on thin slices of turkey. "I much prefer mountain lion," he added offhandedly, waiting for her reaction at his casually mentioned diet.

Bella froze for only a moment and then nodded. "I'm sure it's...delightful." She made a face, which made him chuckle. "What about the others?"

He explained that for the most part, his family preferred carnivores, but Emmett and Rose—who enjoyed bears and caribou respectively—were the only ones with a specific preference.

"Emmett wrestles bears?" Bella's jaw dropped. "Isn't that...dangerous?"

Edward chuckled again, tapping his forearm with his other hand. "Impervious skin, remember?"

She nodded slowly. "Oh, right..." Shaking her head, she finished adding cheese, lettuce, and tomato to the sandwich before turning back to the refrigerator. When she came back out with the carton of milk, Edward laughed. "What's so funny?"

"Out of all the foods and drinks we've ever encountered, milk is one of the foulest. We can't explain why." As he told her about the bet he'd made with Emmett and Jasper, her eyes grew wide.

"That's... That's hysterical," she finally said with a giggle. "I can't wait to see that. Poor guy."

Edward scoffed. "Poor guy nothing. He'll be fine. He lives for those bets."

Bella grabbed an orange and came to sit down next to him at the kitchen table. "What happens when it's sunny?" She gestured up and down his body. "I mean, obviously it's safe for you in the sun, but you can't exactly stay...conspicuous."

"We go 'camping' a lot," Edward explained, using air quotes around camping. "Because our grades are always good—"

Bella snorted. "I should hope so, Mr. I've-Been-to-High-School-and-College-a-Thousand-Times."

Smirking at her, Edward continued, "The schools don't usually put up too much of a fight."

"I'm jealous," Bella said after taking another bite of her sandwich.

She picked up her orange and began trying to start the peeling with her thumb. Edward reached over and plucked it from her hands, making quick work of it before handing it back to her, peeled and split into sections.

Blinking, Bella laughed. "Thanks."

He shrugged. "Don't be jealous... I used to enjoy it—it gives me a reprieve from all the teenage minds, which can be...hard to take—but now? I'd much rather be at school with you."

Bella's cheeks pinked, and the scent of her blood so near her skin had him hard as a rock again. He reached over and brushed the backs of his fingers over her cheek.

"I love that," he said softly.

Bella swallowed the bite she'd taken of her orange, and Edward couldn't help but reach over and capture the drop of the juice that had spilled from her lips. Her arousal spiked when he put the tip of his finger in his mouth and tasted it, and to hold himself back from tasting her mouth with his, Edward gripped his thigh so hard, he heard the fabric render before he released it.

When Bella was finished eating and had rinsed her dishes, she looked over at him. "Wanna sit down here in the living room and talk?"

Edward nodded, smiling when she took his hand.

~oOo~

As much as he hated to leave Bella, by half past five, Edward was hunting, taking down three deer in an effort to keep himself well-fed, while Bella had dinner and spent time with her father. He planned to go home, change clothes, check in with his family, and then be back in Bella's room, waiting for her when she went upstairs later in the evening. Her anxiety that he would leave for good was palpable, and only the promise that he would leave his phone on so she could contact him anytime was enough to calm her fear.

Edward walked in the door of the big house and was immediately stopped by Alice in the hall.

"How is she?"

Aware that the rest of the family was listening, Edward said, "She's okay. Better than she was when I got there."

Alice's thoughts gave her away before she could voice it aloud. "Did she—"

"No, she didn't say she wanted to speak to or see you."

"But—"

"Look, Alice," Edward sighed, shaking his head. "What you did... I understand why you did it—and honestly, I forgive you because you brought me to Bella—but she's not ready yet." She hadn't said it specifically, but he knew, based on the few times she'd mentioned his sister.

Alice nodded, frowning. The vision that flashed through her head showed them as friends, so he knew it would happen, but he wasn't going to force her. When she was ready, she'd tell them.

"I'm going to shower and then go back over."

He brushed past Alice and jogged up to the third floor, stripping off his clothes as he walked into the bathroom.

His shower was quick. He almost gave into temptation to touch himself as he remembered how Bella looked without clothes, how soft her skin was, and how...good she'd smelled when she was aroused, but more than relief, he wanted to get back to her, so he ignored his erection and finished cleaning himself. Once he'd dried off, he pulled on clean jeans and a long-sleeved T-shirt and then pulled on his sneakers.

Carlisle and Esme were waiting for him in the living room when he got downstairs.

"Can we talk?" Esme asked when he poked his head in.

Edward thought about brushing her off, so intent he was on getting back to Bella, but the hope and love in her eyes made him change course and sit down on the chair across from the sofa. From the quiet in his head, he knew that they were the only three in the house.

"How is she, really?" she asked softly.

"She's..." Edward took a deep breath and smiled. "She's amazing. We talked all afternoon. She still loves to draw, and her favorite classes are still art and English. She likes a wide range of music, including classical and country, but not rap—which will please Jasper... Emmett, not so much," he said with a grin as they chuckled. He sobered and looked at them. "It... It seems that she felt the same thing I did while we were apart." Edward absently rubbed the spot on his chest, feeling the tattoo beneath his fingers.

"That doesn't surprise me," Carlisle said, smiling as he looked over at Esme.

"No," Esme agreed. "Me, either."

"Why?" Edward shook his head. "She's...human and was so young..."

"I felt some of that, too, when Carlisle left me after fixing my leg." Esme reached over to take hold of Carlisle's hand and then looked back at Edward. "It wasn't to that degree, because the circumstances were very different. We only spent less than an hour together, while you were with Bella for much longer. But my heart recognized that he was different, special, and I never forgot him."

"It's because you're mates, son," Carlisle chimed in. "Even a human mate is affected."

Edward nodded and then looked to the door. His skin was almost itching because he so badly wanted to get back to Bella.

Esme laughed, drawing his attention again. "Go to her, Edward. We'll talk more later."

He sighed and stood as they did. "Thanks," he murmured, surprising them both with hugs before he stepped away.

* * *

_A/N: So you got the tattoo reveal. :) I know some of you are upset that he hasn't had the mate discussion with her, but I promise, he will. Bella is a bit...overwhelmed right now. Give her a chance to acclimate to her new normal, and I promise, he'll talk to her. :)_

_Voting for the Fanfic Awards ends tomorrow, so be sure to check my profile for a link!_

_Leave me some love! I can't wait to hear what you think about this one. :) Mwah! – Jen_


	14. Chapter 13

_A/N: You guys! We're *thisclose* to 1500 reviews, which is amazing! I can't say enough how thankful I am that you're loving this as much as you are and how you've shown me that love and support. So thank you. :) Okay, see me at the bottom. :)_

* * *

**Chapter Thirteen**

Ten minutes after Edward left, Bella shook herself out of her thoughts. She knew she needed to get to the grocery store—yesterday's stop had been a bust, since she'd left the full cart of food in the middle of the aisle—so she grabbed her keys and headed out to the truck.

As she drove to the store, Bella couldn't help but rub her chest. It ached, a horrible hollow feeling that felt like it had cracked wide open, and she wasn't sure she understood why. She'd felt it a lot right after the attacks and off and on the past three years, but she'd attributed it to her panic attacks. But then it had been so much stronger after Edward left the house a few minutes before. She didn't know what to think. It almost felt like...like she'd lost her other half.

Bella scoffed. There was no way that could be it. They'd really just started to get to know one another. How could she have fallen for him that quickly?

_You've been falling for three years._

Fighting against her thoughts, Bella shook her head. Surely not...

She wasn't sure if she wanted her rational side or her romantic side to come out on top.

Rather than continuing to argue in her head, Bella decided to go with the flow and let it play out. She had no illusions... The attraction was there, sure, and she felt...off without him beside her, especially now, but whether that equated to love, she had her doubts.

After climbing out of the truck, Bella pocketed her keys and then headed into the store, putting thoughts of Edward as far back in her mind as she could.

~oOo~

Bella was in the middle of finishing off the pasta to go with the chicken when Charlie came in the door an hour after she'd returned from the store.

"Hey, Bells," he said when he walked into the kitchen. "Smells good."

She smiled. "Thanks. Chicken Parm tonight."

He came over and peeked into the bowl on the counter, making a face. "Green beans? Aww, Bells. You know I hate green stuff."

Bella laughed, shaking her head. "It's good for you, Dad. You'll eat it, or you won't get the strawberry shortcake I have for dessert."

Charlie backed off, his mustache twitching in amusement. "Yes, ma'am."

"Dinner's ready when you are." She turned off the burner and moved the pot to the sink to drain it. "You going to change first?"

He nodded and hurried out of the room. By the time he returned in a red and black flannel shirt open over a gray T-shirt and jeans instead of his uniform, the table was set, including glasses of milk for them both, and Bella was dishing up her plate. When she first moved in with him, she'd started dishing his up, as well, but he'd shooed her hand away, saying she didn't need to serve him. He hadn't fought her on the cooking, since he couldn't boil water to save his life, but he was a whiz at the dishes. The arrangement had worked out well for both of them.

As they ate, Charlie told her about the preteen boys he'd picked up for tagging with spray paint around town. When there was a lull in the conversation, Bella brought up the Cullens. She'd spent some time trying to figure out what she was going to tell Charlie about them, and she thought she had a story that would work.

"It's a really small world," she said in between bites. When Charlie looked up, she smiled. "Guess who just moved to town?" When he just looked blankly at her, she said, "Dr. Cullen and his family."

Charlie's eyebrows shot up, and he set his fork down. "The doctor who treated you in New York?"

Bella nodded. "The very one."

He watched her carefully as he asked, "Are you going to be okay with seeing him?"

"Of course," Bella said with a smile. "Dr. Cullen helped me a lot...after. It'll actually be good to see him again and thank him, since by the time I was feeling up to it, he'd already left the hospital.

"Anyway, they have five kids—"

Charlie's eyebrows shot up again in surprise.

Bella laughed. "Yeah." She explained the Cullens' story like Edward had to her. "I met their daughter Alice briefly once while I was in the hospital when she came to visit Dr. Cullen. When she left, she gave me her e-mail address, and I found it in my notebook when I finally started drawing again after I was home from the hospital and comfortable. We've e-mailed back and forth a couple of times a month since then.

"Anyway, when Alice learned where they would be moving, she thought about telling me, but decided to let it be a surprise. They'll all be starting as seniors in a few days, too."

"Five teenagers under one roof..." Charlie grunted. "More power to them. I just hope they're no trouble."

Smirking, Bella shook her head. "I don't think they will be. Neither Dr. Cullen nor his wife seemed like pushovers when I met them."

"We'll see," Charlie muttered before taking another bite of pasta.

"Anyway, Alice called a few hours after the store, and she and one of her brothers came over for a while this afternoon. I told them all about the school and the kids there. All that good stuff. They're really nice."

"That's good. It'll be good for them to know someone before school starts."

Bella took a deep breath. This next part was tricky, and she hated lying to her dad, but especially about this. "Yeah, and...the other one is named Edward."

Charlie's gaze shot to hers, and she nodded slowly.

"He mentioned that he'd been by the hospital to see his dad the day I came out of surgery, so...I probably overheard them talking, or heard the nurses mention his name or something. That's where I got the name to go with the story my mind had made up. Alice had always called him Eddie or E in her e-mails, so I hadn't put it together until he introduced himself this afternoon." As much as she'd hated to, Bella had stopped talking about Edward to everyone—everyone but Alice, but Bella wasn't ready to go there yet—not long after she'd moved to Forks. She'd been tired of everyone telling her that he wasn't real. So now, she had to act the part, even though she now knew without any doubts that she'd been right.

Charlie stroked his mustache, nodding slowly. "I guess it's good to know, finally, huh?"

Bella agreed with a nod, focusing her attention on cutting up a bite of chicken.

"Are you okay, Bells? With Dr. Cullen moving into town and learning about his son..."

She assured him that she was. "It's probably the best I've felt since...that day." He didn't look convinced, but it was the truth. "I swear, Dad."

Finally, he smiled and nodded, and to Bella's relief, that was the end of conversation.

Three hours later, Bella stood from the couch and stretched as Charlie turned off the movie. He'd asked if she wanted to watch _The Matrix,_ and she'd agreed, even though all she'd wanted to do was go upstairs and see if Edward had come back like he'd told her he would.

"Night, Dad. I think I'm going to go draw or read or something before I crash."

"G'night, kid." Charlie smiled as he clicked the TV off. "I'll be up in a bit, too."

Bella nodded and then turned, holding herself back from taking the stairs at a run.

When she opened her bedroom door, he was there, leaning against the wall across from her. He smiled and held out his hand. She quickly closed her door before rushing over to him. Relief had her ignoring his hand and wrapping her arms around him, shaking as she gripped the back of his shirt.

"Hey, hey," he murmured, his hand moving up and down her back gently, soothing her. "What's this, huh?"

Bella mumbled into his chest, not particularly wanting to admit her fear.

Edward's arms tightened around her, just enough that she felt secure without being too tight, and then he pulled away. With a finger under her chin, he lifted her face so she had to look him in the eye.

"Little Bird, I'm not going anywhere, remember?"

She nodded, looking down for a second before looking back up into his eyes. "You'll have to be patient with me... It might take a while to sink in."

He smiled and brushed a finger down her cheek, making her shiver not from the cold or fear, but awareness. "We have all the time in the world. We'll get there."

The two of them settled on her bed, with Bella's back against the headboard, her legs crossed, and Edward across from her. She hadn't let go of him since she'd gotten to the room, and by the way his hand held hers, she didn't think he wanted to let go, either.

"What'd you do while you were gone?" she asked, leaning forward to trace around his eyes lightly with her finger. "They're a brighter gold than they had been. Did you...?"

He nodded. "I hunted before going home."

She grinned, remembering their earlier discussion. "Mountain lion?"

Edward smirked and shook his head. "Deer."

Pretending to be horrified, Bella dropped her jaw and gasped. "You ate Bambi?"

He laughed and reached out to gently poke her side, making her giggle and squirm away from his touch, but his other hand held her firmly...until he suddenly whipped his head to the door. Dropping her hand, he whispered, "Get your cell phone out," and then before she could blink, he was out the window and the room was like he'd never been there.

Bella understood as soon as Charlie knocked on her door.

"Come in," she called, pulling her phone away from her ear and tossing it onto the mattress as her dad poked his head in.

"Were you on the phone, Bells? I heard laughing..."

"Yeah, Dad, sorry. I was talking to Angela. Sorry I was so loud."

He waved off her apology. "I'm going to bed. See you tomorrow after work if you're not up by the time I leave in the morning."

"'Kay. G'night."

Bella waited patiently, and a couple of minutes after the bathroom door shut, Edward slipped back into the room. She smothered a giggle as he sat back down on the bed.

"Oops?"

Edward nodded with a grin and tapped his temple. "This and the enhanced hearing comes in handy sometimes," he said softly.

He continued to speak quietly as he told her about the rest of his trip home while she'd spent time with Charlie. When he mentioned Alice, Bella shook her head.

"I'm not..." She sighed.

"You're not ready," he said for her, squeezing her hand when she nodded. "I know, and Alice knows, too. She'll wait until you are."

Bella mumbled, "Okay," and then was quiet, listening as Charlie came out of the bathroom and closed his bedroom door behind him.

"I'm gonna go..." She pointed to the bathroom, feeling her cheeks warm.

At Edward's smile and nod, Bella climbed from the bed and gathered her nightclothes, opting for sleep shorts and a tank top, rather than the old T-shirt she normally wore. She gave him one last look before she slipped out of the room, closing it behind her.

~oooOOOooo~

Edward's phone vibrated in his pocket moments after Bella left the room. He pulled it out and opened the text message. Jasper.

_Everything good? Alice said you almost got caught..._

Edward snorted silently and quickly typed a reply. _All good. Is she pouting?_

Alice's reply came moments later. _I'm not pouting. I get it. She has every right to be upset. She'll forgive me, though._

He hoped Bella made her sweat, just to show his sister that she could stand up to her and not fold easily.

Jasper's reply had him snickering. _Like hell I'm answering that, you fool. My wife is a lovely, patient woman-and always correct. Talk later, brother._

Edward slid his phone back into his pocket and listened to the sounds coming from the bathroom.

Bella was in the shower already. He could hear the water hitting her skin, her sighs as he imagined it relaxing her muscles. Groaning, he thought about how she must look: droplets glistening over skin pink from the hot water; long, dark wet hair smoothed back from her face; nipples puckered from the cool air.

Edward adjusted himself and stood, needing off the bed, where the temptation to bury himself in her scent was too great.

A few minutes later, the shower shut off, and he could hear the gentle _swish, swish, swish_ as she used the towel on her newly cleaned skin. The water ran in the sink as Bella brushed her teeth, and then all was quiet aside from the soft sound of what he thought had to be the brush through her hair.

When Bella came in shortly after that, Edward closed his eyes and groaned aloud as the vision of all her creamy skin—still pink from the shower—and the warm, concentrated scent coming from the bathroom hardened him. He fisted his hands and held himself still, trying to keep himself under control. He was shocked when he felt her warm palm cup his face.

"Edward?"

He could feel the warmth coming from her, and it took everything he had to open his eyes without moving.

Bella gasped and stepped away. "Your eyes..."

Edward didn't have to look to know they were black. "It's all right," he assured her in a rough voice.

"You said they got that way if you're thirsty..."

He nodded slowly. "And aroused," he mumbled behind his hand as he scrubbed his face.

He heard her quick intake of breath and felt her step close again, and then her hand was on his, pulling it away from her face.

"I'm sorry," he said quickly. "You don't have to be worried."

"It's okay." She smiled, shaking her head. "Is there anything I can do?"

He could see the trust in her eyes, and it made him swallow around a sudden lump of emotion. "No, I'm okay. It was just"—he waved a hand around in the air—"everything, I guess. Are you ready for bed?"

She shook her head. "I wanna talk more. I'm just not ready for this day to be over." She blinked up at him. "Is that okay?"

He smiled and used a hand on her lower back to turn her to the bed. "Climb in. We'll talk."

As Bella got comfortable under the sheet and blanket, Edward turned on the lamp beside her bed, switched off the overhead light, and then sat on the floor near her head. Leaning forward, he was able to rest his arms on the bed and reach Bella's hand, yet still be face to face. She curled up on her side and reached up with her free hand, tracing her finger over his skin in a random pattern, like she couldn't quit touching him. He was glad... He couldn't quit touching her, either.

"Bella?" he asked a moment later when she'd been silent. "Can you tell me about why you moved to Forks?"

"Alice didn't tell you?" She sounded skeptical.

He shook his head. "I avoided her as much as I could. I wanted to hear it from you."

She smiled, but it was a sad smile, and then nodded.

"My mom..." She sighed. "She was always worrying about me, and because of it, she hovered. Like, a lot."

Edward listened as she gave him examples of how her mother had driven her crazy with questions of whether or not she was okay. He had to admit to himself that if he'd been in her mother's shoes, he might've reacted the same way, but it was only because they both loved her and worried.

"What finally pushed me over the edge was Sarah's sister, Kaycee," Bella continued.

Sarah... One of the friends who'd died that day. Edward nodded for her to go on.

"Toward the end of my sophomore year, the incoming freshmen were touring the high school, and I saw Kaycee with her group. It had been almost two years, and the hate in her eyes..." Bella was shaking, and he reached up with his other hand, rubbing her arm gently. "She blames me for being alive when she isn't."

"And you couldn't face her?" He wasn't sure he'd have been able to, either.

"No, that's not it," Bella said firmly, surprising him. "I didn't want her to see me every day and have one more reminder that I was here and her sister wasn't. I came home that day, and my mom could tell I was even more upset than normal. So when she asked if I was okay, I kind of...exploded. I apologized later, but by then, I knew I needed to leave. Between all of that and the panic attacks and nightmares..."

Edward felt protectiveness sweep through him, and he nodded. "I'm sure."

She snorted softly, interrupting him. "She told you that, did she?"

He said hesitantly, "After I figured out you were here, yes."

Bella nodded. "I had them from the very beginning."

As she told him all about the nightmares of falling into blackness and never waking up, of being trapped under the wreckage alone and not having him there, and of the other kids at school coming after her for living when Sarah and Ashley had not, his heart broke for her. She curled in on herself as she told him about the panic attacks from being up too high and being worried that the building would come crashing down, or being down in a basement and feeling like the walls were closing in. Her heartbeat and breathing began to quicken. Tears welled in her eyes, making him hurt deep inside.

"Shh, Little Bird," he murmured. "It's okay. Stay with me, okay? Just breathe."

Finally, Bella began to breathe normally again, and her heart slowed to much more of a normal rhythm.

"I'm sorry I wasn't there," he told her softly when she opened her eyes to look at him. He reached up to wipe away the tears that had fallen.

She smiled tremulously. "It's okay. You're here now."

Edward couldn't help but repeat what he'd told her several times already. "And I'm not going anywhere unless you tell me to, sweetheart."

"What if you meet someone else?" she asked, looking down and away from him.

"Bella..." He waited until she was looking at him before continuing. "When a vampire meets"—he wanted to say his mate, but decided instead on—"that special person, their feelings don't change. Ever. So you don't need to worry about me finding someone else and leaving. My feelings are forever, sweetheart."

Bella's heart rate picked up, but he didn't see or smell an ounce of fear. There was arousal in her scent and curiosity and...something else, something he was afraid to name, in her eyes, but when she spoke, she was much more calm than she'd been.

"You said you don't sleep..." At his nod, she asked, "Would you stay with me tonight? At least until I fall asleep," she hurried to add. "I know it would be pretty boring to be here all night. But it's been a long, emotional day, and I'm worried about...about nightmares after everything."

She looked lost, and he couldn't help but reach up and brush a hand down her cheek softly.

"I'll stay."

Bella graced him with a smile, and then she closed her eyes. "Thank you...for coming to me this morning, for listening, and for staying."

Her breathing evened out as she fell asleep before he could reply.

A few hours later, Edward was still sitting beside Bella's bed when she made a squeaking noise and then groaned.

"Bella?" he asked softly, but when she didn't reply, he settled back against the nightstand and picked up the sketchpad and pencil again. He was using the light from his phone to see, having turned off the bedside lamp after she fell asleep.

Not long after, Bella made another sound, and then another, but the soft cries of fear and shock cut him deep. He turned off the light on his phone, slid it into his pocket, and turned to look at her. She was on her stomach, her face turned toward him, with the sheet and blanket tangled around her legs. He pulled them up to cover her and then sat down beside her.

Brushing her hair back from her face, he said, "Hush, Little Bird. You're safe. I'm right here."

"No!" she cried. "Please! Someone help!"

"Bella... Wake up, sweetheart," Edward said, keeping an ear out for Charlie Swan, who was snoring in the next room. If Bella woke him, Edward needed to hear so he could hide in time. "C'mon, love. Wake up. You're safe."

"E-Edward," she mumbled, beginning to shake.

"Yeah, Little Bird. I'm here."

"C-Could you hold me? P-Please?"

Edward swallowed and then nodded, even though he knew she couldn't see him in the dark. Moving to the other side of the bed, he slid on top of the mattress, leaving the blanket between himself and Bella. He closed his eyes and held in his groan as she shifted to put her back right to his front. Her hand came back and felt for his, and he allowed her to pull his arm forward to wrap around her waist.

"Th-Thanks," she stuttered, still sounding afraid.

"Always, love. Sleep. I'm not going anywhere, Bella."

He began humming the melody he'd hummed back in the wreckage, flowing into the rest of her lullaby. He'd only gotten about halfway through before she was asleep once more.

* * *

_A/N: So there you have it. :) Chicken Parm for dinner. I know so many of you were wondering! LOL_

_Not a lot to say about this one until you guys have questions. Charlie knows about the Cullens moving back to Forks, and Bella had to lie to him about Edward. Poor thing._

_There probably won't be an update again until next Wednesday. I'm going to be shipping my laptop off to HP in a day or two to have them check the mouse button on the touch pad. It's making a horrible clicky noise, and since it's still under warranty, it's best to get it checked now in case it is breaking. Plus, it's frickin' annoying! LOL So I'll be using my husband's laptop while it's gone, but he doesn't have everything installed that I do, and I'm going to have enough trouble doing what I have to do for work and what not. So...yeah. But I promise you'll want to stick around for the next update. :) Morning after, meeting the family, etc... ;)_

_Leave me some love. I'll need it to get me through the next week without my laptop! LOL Mwah! – Jen_


	15. Chapter 14

_A/N: You guys... Once again, you blew me away with your response to the last chapter. A big chapter, so I'll let you get to it, but see me at the bottom for some exciting news!_

* * *

**Chapter Fourteen**

Bella stretched and rolled over, shielding her eyes from the sunlight shining through her windows. When she finally peeled her eyes open, she realized she was alone. Edward had left at some point during the night.

Had she imagined the nightmare? It had been similar to all the ones she'd had in the past—talking about why she'd moved to Forks had prompted it, most likely—except in this last one, Edward had left her in the dark alone instead of staying with her. His voice had been the only thing to calm her. She could swear that he'd climbed onto the bed and held her...

When she rolled back over, she noticed a paper folded and propped up against the picture frame holding Edward's drawing. Her name was written in perfect script on the front. With a smile, she reached over and grabbed it, pulling it over to read.

_Little Bird,_

_I wish I could've been there when you woke up, but you were sleeping so soundly that I didn't have the heart to wake you. You felt so good in my arms that I hated to leave when Alice texted me and told me I needed to be home before the sun came up because it would be sunny all day._

_I know yesterday probably gave you a lot to think about, but if you so choose, I would love to see you today. Would you come to me since I can't come to you? My family would love to meet you, too._

_You have my phone number. Call or text anytime._

_Yours, always,_

_Edward_

Bella let out a little squeak. So she hadn't imagined him holding her... She glanced down at the address and directions he'd included and then reached over and grabbed her phone from the nightstand.

_Thank you for the note. Is it okay if I come over after breakfast?_

Once she'd sent the text, she climbed out of bed, grabbed her clothes, and headed to the bathroom to do her morning routine. Ten minutes later, she was back in the bedroom, face washed, hair up, and clothes on.

A text was waiting for her.

_It's more than okay. I'll be waiting._

Bella smiled, slid her phone into her pocket, and grabbed her keys. She would grab some Pop-Tarts for breakfast, brush her teeth, and then go over to the Cullens. Even though she was looking forward to seeing Dr. Cullen again, she was nervous about meeting the rest of Edward's family—especially after freaking out on Mrs. Cullen at the grocery store—and she wasn't sure how she felt about seeing Alice again. She still felt so...betrayed and embarrassed.

A few minutes later, Bella parked her behemoth of a truck behind a silver Volvo and one of the biggest red Jeeps she'd ever encountered. Her heart was hammering in her chest. The Cullens' house was huge and beautiful. Three stories, lots of wood, floor-to-ceiling windows on all three floors... She'd had no idea there was anything like this in Forks. It was surrounded by a nice-size front yard and trees everywhere. Like Charlie's house, the Cullens' seemed to back up to the forest, although theirs was clearly in the middle of it, rather than just butting up against it.

Taking a deep breath, Bella stepped out of the truck, grimacing when the door closed loudly with a bang. When she looked up, she couldn't help but smile as Edward stepped outside.

"Hi," she said when they met halfway.

"Good morning." He smiled, gesturing to the house. "I apologize now for my family..." At Bella's raised eyebrow, he explained, "Emmett is like a little kid at Christmas, he's so excited to meet you."

Bella chuckled. "From what you told me yesterday, I'm looking forward to it, although I'm afraid he'll crush me," she admitted as they got close to the front door.

A booming laugh from inside made her jump.

Edward rolled his eyes. "That's Emmett. He heard you."

Bella's cheeks heated. "Right. Super hearing..."

Grinning, Edward nodded. "Ready? Last chance to back out..."

She couldn't help but tease him a little. "What will I find in there? Coffins? Maybe a dungeon?"

He looked serious as he replied, "We keep those in the basement. Only the...lucky get to see them."

Snorting, Bella shook her head. "Such a disappointment... I get vampires, but no bats? No coffins or dungeons? You don't even have fangs!"

Edward laughed and pulled the door open, ushering her inside.

Bella's jaw dropped as she took in the inside of the house. Warm colors on the walls, cream-colored sofa, and dark woods all complimented the modern, warm wood on the outside and looked elegant, but comfortable. "I can't believe you guys just moved in the other day..."

Hands in his pockets, Edward smiled and shrugged. "A product of having moved as many times as we have and not having to sleep."

Bella nodded, even as she continued looking around. On one side of the room, opposite the TV, was a beautiful piano—a baby grand, she thought. "Is this yours?"

Edward nodded, smiling as she ran her hand lightly over the keys. "It was in storage for a while until we moved here. It's been nice having it back."

She turned to him and smiled. "I bet." Looking back at the piano, she said, "I'd love to hear you play sometime."

"Anytime...but not now. The family really wants to meet you."

Bella looked around, but didn't see anyone.

He smiled. "They didn't want to overwhelm you."

"Oh. Umm, they can come in anytime," she murmured, twisting her hands together in front of her.

"Hey, sweetheart," Edward said, stepping in front of her and taking her hand. "Don't be nervous. How about just Carlisle and Esme first?"

She nodded again. She could handle Dr. and Mrs. Cullen.

A minute later, the stunning couple walked into the living room, and Bella's eyes filled with unexpected tears at the sight of the familiar doctor.

"Bella?"

Bella waved Edward off and smiled as she wiped her eyes. "I'm okay. Just...overwhelmed. It's good to see you again, Dr. Cullen."

The blond man smiled. "It's good to see you, too, Bella. Please, call me Carlisle."

"Carlisle, then. I didn't get to thank you...before, about taking such good care of me."

"No thanks necessary," he said with a shake of his head. "I'm just glad to see you looking so well."

Bella turned to Mrs. Cullen. "I'm sorry for bumping into you at the grocery store and then just...running off like I did. That was rude, and I apologize, Mrs. Cullen."

Mrs. Cullen smiled softly. "You were surprised. It's understandable. It's lovely to finally meet you, Bella. We're not big on formality around here. Please, call me Esme."

Smiling, Bella turned her head just in time to see the biggest man she'd ever seen walk through the doorway with a beautiful blonde beside him. From Edward's description, she knew they had to be Emmett and Rosalie. Before she could stop herself, she blurted, "That's your Jeep outside, isn't it? I can't imagine you driving a tiny little car every day..."

Emmett's chest puffed up as everyone laughed. He came over and scooped her into a hug—much more gentle than she'd expected. "You know it. Good to meet you, Bella. I promise not to crush you," he teased in her ear before he set her down.

Bella grinned, feeling instantly more at ease. "I'd appreciate it, Emmett." Turning to the blonde, who was watching them with an exasperated smile on her face, Bella said, "You must be Rosalie. I love your hair!"

Rosalie nodded. "Call me Rose. Thank you." She tucked a lock of the long blond hair behind her ear. "It's nice to meet you, Bella. Alice has had nothing but good things to say."

Bella froze at the mention of Alice, and only Edward's hand slipping into hers brought her back to the moment.

"Jasper would like to meet you," he murmured, "but if you don't want to see her, he'll go with Alice and meet you later."

Shaking her head, Bella said, "No, that's okay. I'd like to meet him."

A minute later, Alice walked into the living room, holding hands with Jasper, who was just as Edward had described him.

"Hello, Bella," he said, and the slight Southern accent had her smiling, despite her reservations about seeing Alice again. "It's nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you, too," Bella murmured before looking at the smaller woman with sad eyes beside him. "Alice."

"Hi, Bella..." She smiled at Bella, but it faded when Bella just stepped closer to Edward's side and looked away.

"Wanna see my room?" Edward asked quietly.

Bella nodded, and he guided her out of the living room with a hand on her lower back.

Edward gave her the ten-cent tour on their way upstairs. On the second floor were three bedrooms—all but Edward's—plus offices for both Carlisle and Jasper. The third floor only held two rooms. The first he showed her was a massive library and computer room. The door at the far end of the hall was his.

When he opened the door, Bella stepped inside and felt her eyes widen. She'd never seen so many CDs in one place, except the store. Edward's chuckle behind her had her turning.

"You just kind of...stopped," he said with a grin. "What was it? All the music?"

Chuckling, Bella said, "Yeah. There's...a lot."

He shrugged unapologetically. "I like music and like owning it."

"Nothing wrong with that," she murmured as she turned her gaze back to the room.

It was pretty, yet masculine. The walls were a few shades darker than the cream-colored carpet, and the dark navy of the curtains contrasted nicely with them both. There was a single dresser, a simple desk with a laptop, and a black leather sofa...but no bed.

Bella turned to him. "No bed?"

Edward shook his head. "Don't sleep, remember?"

"But the others..." Her voice trailed off and she felt her cheeks heat as she realized why the others would need beds. "Never mind. Got it."

~oooOOOooo~

Watching Bella look around his room made Edward nervous. Would she like it? Think it too impersonal? Her room was perfectly Bella. There were pictures of her family and friends, books scattered around, drawings she'd done up on the walls and in notebooks throughout the room—not messy, but lived-in and loved. His room was neat, orderly...rather boring. Even his CD collection was organized by genre and year. Bella's room was full of personality. Looking at his now, it felt devoid of all personality.

When she realized why he had no bed and the others did, her face flamed. Not for the first time did he wish he could hear her thoughts. To take her mind off things, he guided her to the wall of windows, which overlooked the Sol Duc River.

"So pretty," she breathed, gazing out into the forest.

"Yes, it is," Edward agreed as she leaned back against him. "Bella..."

"Hmm?" She turned in his arms and smiled up at him.

"How do you want explain..." He hesitated, unsure of how to phrase what he wanted to ask.

"Us?" Bella finished with a smile. "I could say I met you over the summer...but I didn't go anywhere," she huffed with a laugh. "Maybe it would just be best to give the same story I gave my dad."

"That we met briefly in New York a few years ago and you and Alice kept in touch?" Edward nodded slowly as Alice called up in her thoughts that that story would work. "That's okay with me if that's what you wanna do."

Bella smiled. "Works for me."

She looked as if she wanted to say something, but then she bit her lip, and Edward waited to see if she would voice whatever it was. Not being able to hear her mind was definitely a test of patience.

Finally, she asked, "You held me last night?"

Edward nodded slowly, unsure of how she felt about it.

"Thank you," she whispered, throwing her arms around him and hugging him. "It helped."

"Good."

"Did you...hum to me, too?"

"I did."

Her heart was thrumming in her chest, and she took a deep, stuttering breath. "Was it...I mean, did you..."

He smiled softly, reaching up to brush a finger down her cheek. "It was the same thing I hummed to you that day, yes."

"But more," she added. "I don't know it... What—?"

"It's my own composition," Edward admitted.

"Yeah?" At his nod, she asked, "Would you play it for me?"

Edward listened to the rest of his family. Alice and Jasper were in their room, Rose and Emmett were in the garage, and Carlisle and Esme were in his office. The living room was quiet. He held out his hand, smiling when Bella slid hers into it.

In the living room, he sat down on the piano bench, patting the seat beside him, and once she was comfortable, he closed his eyes, let the music flow from his heart to his fingers, and began to play.

It started out slow, tentative, but quickly became light and airy, and he was instantly transported back to that day in 2001. He'd called her Little Bird because she seemed so fragile and delicate, and the song reminded him of a bird in flight and finding peace. The end slowed down again; his feelings of being away from her had helped shape it into what it was.

By the time he finished, Bella had tears in her eyes and the rest of his family had gathered back in the room, although he wasn't sure Bella had noticed. Her attention had bounced between his hands and his face.

"It's beautiful," she finally said after taking a deep breath and releasing it slowly.

Edward reached up and brushed away the fallen tears, smiling.

Esme shifted, which drew Bella's attention to the rest of the room, and her heart quickened for a moment when she turned to see the others.

"Oh! Sorry, I didn't know anyone had come in." Her cheeks pinked, and she giggled when Emmett was his usual self.

"I may be built like a grizzly, but even I can be stealthy when I wanna be," he teased.

Edward leaned down so his breath brushed across her ear. "Do you want to go back upstairs?"

Bella shook her head. "I don't mind. I'd love to talk to everyone more."

He smiled and stood, taking her hand when she held it out.

Once they were seated beside Esme on the couch, Edward watched Bella look quickly at his family and tried to see what she was seeing. Carlisle was again perched on the arm of the couch next to Esme. He and Esme both were watching Bella with warmth. Rose was seated in one of the chairs, with Emmett behind her, leaning casually against the wall. He'd worried that Rose would have a problem with Bella knowing about them, but nothing in her demeanor or thoughts showed that to be the case. Jasper was sitting in the other chair, with Alice sitting on the floor in front and to the side of him as she leaned over against his legs. He was cautiously optimistic, assuring Edward in his thoughts that he still felt no fear from Bella, and Alice was trying not to show how upset she was that Bella still refused to look at her.

For a moment, it seemed no one knew what to say, but then Emmett, being Emmett, used his humor to break up the tension. "So how'd you figure it out?" he asked. "About us, I mean."

Bella smiled, looking first at Edward and then turning to Carlisle. "My dad's best friend is Billy Black."

Carlisle shot Edward a look. _Any relation to Ephraim?_

Edward shrugged minutely and listened as Bella continued.

"I'm friends with his son, Jake, who goes to school out on the reservation. Last year, I had to do a report for History and chose to do it over the Quileute Nation. He told me stories..."

She hesitated, and Edward squeezed her hand, silently urging her to continue.

"Alice didn't tell you all this?" she asked without looking at his sister.

"No, I didn't tell them," Alice voiced quietly.

Bella nodded before continuing. "Jake told me stories about his people turning into wolves and about the Cold Ones—and specifically the one named Carlisle, whom his great-grandfather had made the treaty with. I put two and two together with his information and what I knew of Edward and Dr. Cullen from New York, and I came up with..." She waved her hand in the air, as if saying all of them. "Do they really turn into wolves?" she asked suddenly.

Carlisle spoke before Edward could. "I haven't heard anything about wolves recently, but then, yes, they did. Ephraim was a shifter himself. Jacob hasn't...?"

Laughing, Bella shook her head. "He wants to, he said, but he hasn't."

"Hmm," Carlisle mused. "I wonder what triggers it." _Is it possible... Could it be our presence?_ He looked to Edward, his face and thoughts showing his worry.

"I don't know," Edward murmured too quietly for Bella to hear.

When no one said anything more, Bella spoke again. "Jake said you made a treaty with his great-grandfather to stay off their lands..."

"We did. We agreed to stay off their lands, and he knew he could trust us to refrain from preying on humans, so they agreed to leave us in peace." Carlisle looked thoughtful. "Who is the current chief of the tribe, Bella?"

"Billy Black," she answered.

Carlisle nodded. "Maybe I should give him a call and suggest that we meet at the boundary to let them know we're back in the area and to discuss the treaty... We do have two more members of the family now."

Bella pulled out her cell phone. "I have their phone number, if you need it." When Carlisle nodded, she read out the number, and Edward committed it to memory.

"Thank you, Bella." Carlisle smiled. "I'll give him a call tomorrow."

"No offense to Bella, 'cause I know you won't say anything," Emmett started—Edward wanted to object to what he was going to say next, but he knew it needed asked, and better Emmett than himself—"but should someone do something about this...cub spilling all our secrets?"

"No!" Bella gasped, looking fiercely at Emmett. "He didn't know he was saying anything more than legends."

"I mean no harm," Emmett was quick to say, and his thoughts were apologetic about upsetting her. "Really. I don't wanna hurt the kid or anything. But our secrets have to stay...well, secret, and legend or no, he obviously felt free to tell you about them. Who knows who else has been told, ya know?"

"I'll speak to Billy Black about it when I talk to him about meeting to discuss the treaty. I'm sure it's fine, Emmett. The chances of word making it to anyone is almost nil."

Edward was barely listening. Bella's adamant objection and defense of the boy made his gut twist. Was there something...more between them than friendship? She hadn't said anything, but then, they hadn't known each other that long. They hadn't defined their relationship at all—if, in fact, they even _had_ a relationship.

Edward let that stew as the family continued to talk, asking Bella questions about school, the town, and herself. Edward was amazed at how quickly she relaxed and even began to joke outright with everyone, although she was still cool with Alice, much to his sister's unhappiness. And the family seemed to love her.

_She's darling, Edward,_ Esme thought. _I think I speak for everyone._

Edward smiled and nodded minutely to show that he'd heard her.

When there was a lull in the conversation, Alice finally spoke aloud. "Bella, do you think... I mean, could we talk, just the two of us? Please?"

Bella looked undecided, and Edward was just about to tell Alice to back off, but then she finally nodded. She stood when Alice did and then turned to him.

"I'll be right here."

She nodded and then turned to follow Alice up the stairs.

Edward watched her go, a frown on his face and his heart heavy with worry for her.

"She'll be fine, Ed," Jasper said. "I'll keep an eye on her emotions, okay?"

He nodded distractedly. "Thanks."

* * *

_A/N: So, Bella's met the family and seen Carlisle again for the first time since New York. It went well, didn't it? And now she's ready to listen to Alice. :)_

_Some huge news! The Fanatic Fanfiction Awards were handed out on the 21st, and not only did I get 2nd Place Best Beta, but In Pursuit, the fic I co-wrote with drotuno under Sarge's Girls got 1st Place Favorite Crime Fanfic. (Also, drotuno herself won 4 HUGE awards, and Beffers87, who does our manips and banners, won a ton herself, too!) Check out my profile for a link so you can see all the winners and find some new stories for yourself!_

_On a sad note, I read something on TwilightLexicon the other day that I wanted to mention here. MTV's Larry Carroll, who has been a huge supporter of the Twilight films and fandom from the beginning, recently lost his daughter, two-and-a-half-year-old Savannah. He has set up a fundraiser to give to another little girl. The story is heartbreaking, heartwarming, and I couldn't help but share. If you voted in the Fanatic Fanfiction Awards, or if you've ever voted in any fandom awards...or if you are a fan of MTV & Larry's coverage of Twilight, please, do me a favor and check out his story and then give what you can: $5, $15, $25, $50...or more. Any amount will make a difference. You can find links to the TwilightLexicon story, as well as directly to Larry's fundly campaign, on my profile. Please, please check out the story of Savannah's Stolen Moments. Let's show him once again that Twilight fans not only thank him for his support, but want to support him and a lucky little girl in return._

_Now, leave me some love. It'll probably be next Wednesday for the next update, but who knows... Maybe I'll slip one in on Sunday. ;) Mwah! – Jen_


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